


Honeymoon Avenue

by Danganphobia



Category: Vinland Saga (Anime), Vinland Saga (Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Comedy, Drama & Romance, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Epic Friendship, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Found Family, M/M, Teen Angst, Teenage Drama, Trans Canute (Vinland Saga), arranged marriage but also not, author makes attempt to acknowledge the Fuck of a bloodline the jomsvikings have with each other, bc they're just tryna to get canute and thorfinn together without them killin each other, everyone's gay and pining, hell lets throw some einar/snake in here too, i think its the modern au we all need where the viking family are just bad parents, if vinland saga were a netflix teen drama this would probably be it, more cast ensemble cameos appear as we go along, side gudhild, we know they lesbians harold
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-09 17:39:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 40,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27620126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Danganphobia/pseuds/Danganphobia
Summary: Askeladd's trying to get a promotion and raise up in the field again after he lost his old job. Fortunately for him, his boss Sweyn's got an candid eye for his abilities and offers the opportunity.Only under one condition.If he gets his son, Canute, to befriend Askeladd's recently orphaned and now troublesome son— Thorfinn.Unlucky for them both, Thorfinn hated everyone. Canute's just trying to exist peacefully, Askeladd really wants this new promotion, and Bjorn and Thorkell are there, too. Including everyone else, to cause problems.
Relationships: Askeladd/Bjorn (Vinland Saga), Canute/Thorfinn (Vinland Saga)
Comments: 28
Kudos: 87





	1. The Dinner Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Thorfinn gets sent home from school, which is nothing new. But Askeladd has a better proposition for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New fic!! And YES its a modern au. I saw a bunch of cool modern AU art on twitter around the time I was still watching the anime and I was surprised that no one's hopped on that shit yet. So I wanted to make something cute and fluffy and funny to COPE after I finished it myself. (yes im still hurt)
> 
>  **EDIT** : LMAO so the research I did for Sweyn's surname is supposed to be Sweynson so IM GOING TO CHANGE IT TO THAT FROM NOW ON
> 
> A few notes:
> 
> -Public high school Hell  
> -Throwing canon out the window  
> -Ylva and Helga are acquainted with Asky and let him take Thorfinn into custody for Reasons  
> -The viking family's still horrible  
> -Ensemble cast will either be Thorfinn's age or slightly a little older  
> -Everyone's fucking alive because I say so  
> -They work regular jobs but who says they're good at it

Thorfinn leaned back on the chair, bouncing his leg. He watched the other kid just beat the shit out of leave with their parent like five minutes ago, and he had no interest in making conversation with the guidance counselor.

Where the fuck is Askeladd. He’s tired, and at this point he already knew he’s about to get sent home.

The bruise on his lower lip hurt. The more he licked his lip it did little to numb the sting and he tasted blood on it.

“Thorfinn?” Another voice called out from the doorway.

He didn’t say anything, knowing already. “Your dad is here to see you.”

“Your dad is here to see you, my ass.” He mumbled under his breath. Unfortunately the poor guidance counselor heard that.

“Sorry I’m late!” Askeladd rushed in, _this man had a latte in his fucking hand._ “You know, just… phew, traffic!”

Thorfinn picked up his backpack and turned around, not making eye contact with him. “But you had time to go to Starbucks.” he sneered, brushing past him.

“My apologies.” Askeladd sweetly apologized to the staff that basically held him hostage for the past hour.

“Oh, don’t worry about it. We’ll see him again soon.” The teacher who informed Thorfinn of his dad’s presence saw them off. Yeah, Thorfinn agreed to that too.

Askeladd’s oh so beguiling demeanor faded the second they left the school building. “What’d you do this time, Thorfy?”

“Put a sock in it, dick.” Thorfinn scowled. “Some fuckhead called my hair a mop today.”

“That’s a little less creative than I expected.”

Thorfinn glared at him. “So I hit him with a chair.”

“Hmm.” Askeladd hummed, “how’d he take it?”

“He cried.”

“Ah, thatta boy.” Askeladd laughed, “Surprisingly this is only the what, third fight at your new school?”

“Three and a half.” Thorfinn muttered, “last kid pissed his pants and ran away to the playground.”

“Okay, as much as I don’t mind you play fighting with other kids at school—”

“—it’s not play-fighting.”

“You never liked it when I said bullying.”

“It’s not bullying either.” Thorfinn didn’t bully other kids. If anything, people liked to say shit about him that got him pissed off. He’s aware he’s gotten suspended more than a normal amount (as if suspension was supposed to be common, uncle Thorkell said it was because he also did— Asgeir said it wasn’t common) and was known for transferring schools due to fighting to avoid the risk of expulsion on his record, because Askeladd was such a kind influential businessman the staff wanted to kiss his ass and avoid getting sued in favor of ignoring the complaints from other teachers, parents, and students that their child was throwing hands with a degenerate.

Usually Askeladd’s excuse was that Thorfinn wanted to fight everyone, he’s a teenage kid. (“Is it supposed to be called emo?” _“God,_ if you don’t shut up old man.”) Surely if he kept sweet-talking them (with money, a no-brainer) their eyes would sparkle and they’d agree to not do shit about it. So yeah, Askeladd was pretending Thorfinn was an angel of a son for the sake of keeping him in at least, a single school to avoid homeschooling him. If Askeladd had to homeschool him Thorfinn would end up biting him like he did in grade school.

He didn’t know how to control his emotions and sometimes punching things didn’t solve all your problems. In Thorfinn’s case— it did if it meant people shutting the fuck up.

“Not even two weeks at this school.” Askeladd whistled, “well that’s a world-record. It ain’t the best one on the block either so I don’t blame you.”

Like he ever gave a shit about sending him off to a private school or boarding school when he clearly had the money to pay for it. Thorfinn refused when the suggestion came up the first time, because he’d end up fighting somebody there too. It’s inevitable.

His therapist told him that this was just a thing that’d fade away once he graduated and high school wasn’t a good time for everybody. Thing is, Thorfinn didn’t give a shit about school in general. Why was he obligated to care about the shithole that came after this one? He’s only going here because he’s forced to, not because it’s convenient. Yet his teachers liked to praise him for doing so well when he felt like it and constantly remind him about his _hidden potential._

“Hope I don’t get expelled from this one.” Thorfinn joked.

“You could at least make one friend.”

“No.”

“Find a nerd to bully, or something.”

Every social clique just avoided him or wanted to talk to him as little as possible. It’s not because they were scared of him, most people were just annoying. Most. The only person Thorfinn could tolerate was probably Bjorn and that was because he wasn’t an annoying shithead like everyone else he knew. Which wasn’t much to begin with.

Sometimes he didn’t understand why him and Askeladd were friends, the old man was insufferable.

“Hurry up.” Thorfinn got in the passenger seat, shutting the door behind him. “Being here is suffocating.”

“Not until you buckle your seatbelt first.” Askeladd reminded him.

“Don’t tell me what to do.” Thorfinn buckled his seatbelt anyway.

“...Say, are you sure you don’t wanna make any friends?”

Thorfinn was surprised he even cared. “Put this in the coaster for me.” Askeladd gestured to the coaster next to the stick shift. Thorfinn snatched it from him. “It’s a caramel latte, wanna try it?”

“No.” Thorfinn did, but no way in Hell was he going to drink from Askeladd’s cup. He put it in the coaster.

“Which question are you answering?”

“Does it matter?”

“It’s just strange how all the years you been goin’ to school for you never befriended anybody.”

Thorfinn shrugged. “I don’t like people.”

“You won’t get anyone to like you back that way.” Glaring at people just came easier to avoid interaction.

“How did _you_ make friends?” Thorfinn immediately regretted asking that once Askeladd got into that same fucking spiel about _oh back in my day I had to work hard because everyone doubted me, just like they doubt you_ —

“ _Nevermind_ —” Thorfinn gritted out, “ _forget I asked.”_

Askeladd gave him that shit-eating grin and cackled, “anyway, it’s different for me. In case you’re wondering.”

“I’m literally not.”

“You don’t make friends the same way you do now. They’re just colleagues. Co-workers.”

“Bjorn is not a colleague.”

Askeladd cleared his throat, “ _well he is_ because we work in the same branch—”

“—you were friends in high school.”

“I can’t use him as an example of both a colleague and a friend?”

Bjorn came over literally every other morning so they could carpool to work together, sometimes he tagged along to drop Thorfinn off at school while he had to listen to him and Askeladd talk and giggle about shit— he came to every family gathering, all of Thorfinn’s school events that of which he participated in against his will. Yet Bjorn was just a colleague, okay then.

This was basically like the bastard’s second house, when he had his own fancy ass flat he lived in— which he ignored completely to come over to their house.

“What is your point anyway?”

“I’m just sayin’!”

“Don’t need you telling me what’s good for me.”

Askeladd sighed, leaning back. Thorfinn frowned. The Hell was up with him today?

“...You think your dad would’ve liked it if this is what you did with your life? I mean, I doubt Ylva or Helga do either. I'm very good friends with them."

"They fucking hate you." He's only just recently gotten in contact with them since the accident and they're still accepting the fact that Askeladd decided he'd take custody to "take the weight" off their shoulders, worst decision Thorfinn couldn't decide for himself. But they're literally across the country right now.

"They love me. I'm the nicest person they've ever met because I'm doing them a favor and taking your crazy ass off their hands." Askeladd argued.

“Don’t.” They were not doing this. Absolutely fucking _not_.

“Fighting kids at school? Getting suspended?”

“Thorkell says it’s good to get suspended at least once.”

“...I mean, we’ve all been there. But you get what I mean.”

“Living with you is not what I wanted to do with my life.” But he didn’t have a choice after the accident and he was left orphaned up until Askeladd and Bjorn waltzed in— decided maybe they wanted to take a six year old problem child into custody just because they wanted to suffer, who the fuck knew the reason. Not that Thorfinn preferred to stay at the orphanage either— but it wasn’t under Askeladd’s _roof_.

“Look on the bright side, you get to be around normal kids your age! But then…” Askeladd let out a dramatic sigh and gestured to Thorfinn, “You’re not normal!”

“Fuck off.” Thorfinn jeered. He’s not wrong, and he didn’t have any rebuttal for that.

“Someone called your hair a mop today.”

“I hit that person with a chair.” He didn’t give a damn what anyone thought of his hair. He washed it when convenient. He didn’t see what was wrong with it. “If you trick me into going to a barber shop again I will bite you.”

“You don’t want handsome hair like mine?”

“Your hair is ugly, the same as your face.”

“Oh, Thorfy…”

 _“Don’t call me that_.”

“For once I’m making a pretty tame suggestion in my opinion and yet it never works.” Unfortunately Thorfinn was the type of the person to do things on his own and fuck up miserably instead of asking for help. He’d rather stab himself with his shiv he carried around than ask Askeladd for genuine _advice._ But the same went for anyone.

It’s not that Askeladd hadn’t _tried_ many times to help Thorfinn get his shit together. Whether it be telling him not to wear the same shirt for three days in a row to school or not to blast his music out loud and slam his door shut when people are over, buy him at least decent clothes that weren’t dirty or tattered (Thorfinn argued he washed them) and he’d just end up hoarding new clothes in his drawer and continue wearing the old ones that he fought Askeladd for to not send to GoodWill as of Bjorn’s request.

“I’m not being homeschooled.”

“We already decided that wasn’t an option.” Askeladd said. “I mean. I get it. You don’t like me. I’m still figurin’ out how to make this work. Can you blame me for being tired we have to run around and do all this nonsense?”

Thorfinn never asked him to pay hundreds of dollars just to keep his ass in a classroom— not even to pay off school lunch debt or other expenses, it’s to make sure that the staff didn’t immediately settle with expulsion because there’s always a complaint one way or the other.

If he just ran away to become a nomad in the fields somewhere far, far away— he wouldn’t have to worry about algebra homework being due the next day. He wished history wasn’t exactly what it was. _In the past._ Sounded like fighting to the death as vikings would rather be much simpler than the pythagorean theorem. He thought about the homework he had due piling up and wanted to smash his head open with a textbook. None of this was fucking necessary. Was he going to prove a triangle existed _anytime_ in the near future? _Absolutely the fuck not_. What knowledge would he ever use solving binomials for? Nothing.

It didn’t make any fucking sense and yet Askeladd said if he went to college for business then he could finish high school and figure out what the fuck he wanted to do with his life. It’s normal to have crises in life, _just look at Thorkell_ — he said, he’s a walking existential crisis and yet he managed to become a P.E teacher. Thorfinn just thought he scared somebody shitless into giving him that job because he’s surprised kids want to step a foot near that man and not shit themselves in general. He can’t even walk in a building without hitting his head on the ceiling.

“Can I drop out?” Thorfinn asked nicely.

“Nice try.” Askeladd started up the car. Thorfinn pouted. Well, it was worth a shot.

Something was up with Askeladd.

Normally, Thorfinn just ignored him whenever he’d start acting weird like that. Like when he’d want to take Thorfinn out for some _quality father-son bonding time_ — which Thorfinn despised doing. He’d get all excited and had the audacity to demand that they go out and that he didn’t spend his weekend playing video games all day.

The most fatherly thing he’s done was offer to buy him happy meals when he had a shitty day at school.

He did it _again_ when he was playing video games online when he heard a knock on his door, first, he ignored it because he had headphones on— and then he heard someone shout, _“THORFINN KARLSEFNI-CASTUS_ —” and _God fucking damn it_ —

Thorfinn ripped his headphones off and threw it at the television.

“ _WHAT?!_ ”

“Get ready.” Askeladd’s standing at the doorway like the _motherfucker_ that he was, “We have a _very_ important dinner with my boss tonight.”

“You’re telling _me_ because?!”

“Get off the video game.”

“ _Fuck you_ I’m still playing.”

Askeladd didn’t give a fuck. Most of the time he’d leave Thorfinn be if he didn’t want to do anything asked of him, the exception being chores, but if this was urgent he wasn’t taking no for an answer. Storming over and pulling the plug on the television just as Thorfinn was in the middle of a match.

_“What the fuck?!”_

“C’mon, kid. Can’t afford to miss out on this damn meeting because of video games.”

“I was in the middle of—”

“— _Shut it_.” Askeladd silenced him, “get dressed.”

“I’m not going to your stupid dinner. Go by yourself.”

Askeladd laughed. “Okay. Unless you want me to take away your console—”

“—what—” Thorfinn gawked, “—you weren’t even the one who bought this for me! Thorkell did!”

“It’s still under my roof, so!” Askeladd shrugged with nonchalance, “I can take it away if I wanna.”

“Bullshit.”

“I will and you won’t get it back until Christmas.”

Thorfinn fucking hated this family.

“Be down in fifteen minutes.” Askeladd ordered, “oh, I’d suggest you shower again since you got back from school a couple hours ago.”

“Fuck you old man.” Thorfinn left his bedroom to head toward the bathroom.

“And wear a suit!” Askeladd chimed in. Thorfinn ignored him. He took the quickest shower he could muster since he didn’t have much fucking time on his hands— but he didn’t think this was worth getting ready for. He ignored all the clean suits in his closet and went for a plain shirt and jeans to wear with a leather jacket with the only pair of converses he had worn out at the soles.

He registered _this_ was why Askeladd was dressed up all nice and swank in his blazer and cravat, it was for this dinner shit. Thorfinn descended the staircase and Askeladd was in the middle of a busy phone call, his eyes landed on Thorfinn in immense distraught.

“I’ll see you there, sir, yes we’re on our way.” He hung up, “there’s no way in Hell you’re wearing that.”

“I’m not wearing a suit.” Thorfinn grumbled.

“ _Thorfinn._ ” Oh, not _Thorfy_ this time huh.

“You know I hate wearing those.” Thorfinn refused. They’re tight and itchy, plus it was still hot because it was in the middle of September. No way in fucking Hell was he going to wear that shit— he had no idea how Askeladd could wear suits every single day for work without suffocating.

“This is a dinner with my boss.” Askeladd said.

“I’m coming to this stupid shit, aren’t I?” Thorfinn compromised, “unless you want me to plug my shit back in no way I’m wearing a suit.”

Askeladd sighed. “You—” he clicked his tongue, “God damn little brat.”

Thorfinn said what he said.

“Let’s go.” Askeladd said.

“How long is this supposed to take?”

“As long as it needs to be.”

“I should get something out of this, baldy.” Thorfinn insisted. “At least for you ruining my game I was _winning_.”

Askeladd opened the door, throwing on his coat. Thorfinn walked out the door, Askeladd shutting it behind him.

“I give you everything you want.”

“Bjorn’s the one who gets me stuff because you don’t even know what to get me.” His birthday he received an Olive Garden coupon because he thought that was what’s hip these days. Thorfinn gave it to Thorkell at Christmas and said he could go hog wild with it. He got his favorite t-shirts, video games, and history books because he might’ve told Bjorn he liked them. Only because he asked what was in his collections one day anyways and guessed from there.

Askeladd laughed, “I mean— you could always tell me if you wanted anything! Of course I’d give it to you.”

“Shove it. I want something _I_ want and not a happy meal toy you pulled out your ass last minute.”

“Okay, I’ve got money. You know I landed that big job after I got fired from the last one.” Thorfinn never heard the end of that up until someone fell for his sorry ass’ charms.

“A motorcycle.”

“...You sure you don’t want an action figure?”

“I turn eighteen in a few weeks, dipshit!”

“Hmm.” Thorfinn stroked his chin, “well what type?”

“Harley Davidson.”

“Well those certainly don’t come cheap.”

“I’m sure you said that to the people you roped into your pyramid scheme you got busted for.” Thorfinn mumbled. He’s surprised the bastard’s not in jail like some of the people in their family whom he knew related to mafia shit, he’s positive it was.

“If you’re gonna go with me dressed like that, I gotta take what I can get.” Askeladd agreed to it.

“That better be a promise.” Thorfinn said.

“Can’t guarantee anything ‘till you make a good impression. These are really important people. Rich family. Make the boss like me and gimme that promotion? Good money for me!”

Thorfinn’s pretty sure Askeladd worked his way up the ranks already given the money he’s making. Guess he wanted to go bigger since he had to start over again.

“Why the fuck am I tagging along then?” He asked heatedly.

“You’ll see.” Askeladd grinned sinisterly.

Thorfinn wanted to spend a shitty day being sent home from school shouting at noobs through a headset— now he’s spending it sitting at a dinner table with a guy Thorfinn’s never seen have so many fucking pimples on his face.

He might’ve mistaken him for a homeless man if it weren’t for him being well-dressed and the way Askeladd shook hands with him when they entered the building. It’s a posh restaurant, and everyone here dressed formally. Thorfinn knew people were eyeing them down, him in particular— once again, he’d just glare right back at them. Like he wanted to fucking be here.

There’s another person with them, though. Someone standing beside the pimple-faced old dude.

His hair a resplendent shade of _golden_ it even shimmered under the bright chandeliers. He was almost standing behind the man, who Thorfinn would presume was Askeladd’s boss. Hiding, that is.

Bright blue eyes made eye contact with Thorfinn, hands shoved in the pockets of his jacket. Jeez, he understood he was underdressed severely. He’s wearing a red blouse, a beige coat, dark pants, and black shoes. He noticed that they had heels on them because he stepped away from the boss when he coaxed him to introduce himself.

“This is Mr. Sweynson my boss. Mr. Sweynson, this is my son Thorfinn I was telling you about!” _God_ , Thorfinn cleared his throat. The biggest attempt he’s ever done was greeting someone professionally. Askeladd gestured over to him.

“Hey.” Askeladd nudged his arm. “H-Hello, Mr. Sweynson…” Thorfinn nodded, hiding his annoyance by ducking his head.

“Hello Thorfinn. You could call me Sweyn if you like.” Thorfinn was sure he wouldn’t be able to last addressing him by that with a straight face. “I’m sure you’ve probably met my son Canute! He goes to Vinland!”

_Wait._

“Um,” Canute stretched a hand, his voice gentle, bashful— still holding a little firmness, “Nice to meet you Thorfinn.”

“ _You go to Vinland?”_ Thorfinn asked, and his genuine confusion and outburst startled Canute. Askeladd smacked him on the back of his head.

“Where the Hell is your damn manners, kid? _This is my boss_ we’re speakin’ to.” He gritted out threateningly.

“It was just a question!” Thorfinn hissed, and he looked at Canute again— backing away just a step out of caution. He didn’t realize he was glaring because that was his face by default. “I just. Didn’t, know. I guess.” he was too stunned to accept his handshake.

“Well then!” Askeladd motioned them toward the dinner table, “well shall we? Come now.”

Askeladd and Sweyn were the first to take their seats— and Askeladd motioned Canute’s way for Thorfinn. But Thorfinn wasn’t understanding his signal here.

“Be a gentleman, would you? Make a damn good impression.”

“How the fuck am I supposed to—”

“Take his coat for him or push his chair back.”

Thorfinn was about to ask _why_ but he just sat down and ignored his confused look. Thorfinn stared at Canute, who stared back at him, blinking.

“Take off your jacket.”

“O-Okay.”

Thorfinn yanked his chair back as well, hard enough a short screech stretched across the room and broke the pleasant silence of everyone else who came here to dine. Askeladd looked like he was about to murder him, and Sweyn’s just staring, puzzled. But he didn’t seem to mind much, nothing more than a concerned glance.

Canute handed his coat to Thorfinn. “Thank you.” he smiled. The gloss on his lips. Thorfinn quickly snatched the jacket away, feeling his cheeks heat up for some odd reason. Canute took his seat, and Thorfinn put the coat on the chair— remembering to go to his seat next to Askeladd.

If he’s being honest— he couldn’t give a damn about what the two men were talking about at the table. It’s definitely related to work, that was, but he realized he hadn’t eaten anything since lunch and it didn’t help that the waiter offered menus and he didn’t know a damn thing on here.

Askeladd seemed to read his mind, knowing he was hopeless. He said they’d just get the same thing, as long as it was _good_ , Thorfinn just shrugged.

“Good choice.” Sweyn laughed, “I have been here a few times, sometimes I like to switch things up.”

“Good to know we fancy similar tastes.” Askeladd marveled. He nudged Thorfinn whenever he tried to look at his phone to pass the time. He didn’t know where else to look, given Canute’s just looking elsewhere and whenever they’d make eye contact he’d look away because Thorfinn glared into his soul.

Apparently he had to eat _properly_ if he made a good impression as well. He might’ve heard a quiet snort coming from Canute’s direction when he looked up, aggravated, but he’s scolded quietly by Askeladd before he’s able to say anything.

“What’s next, if I go to the bathroom I have to wipe my God damn ass with a handkerchief?” Thorfinn jeered at Askeladd, hushed. Askeladd was eating in a way Thorfinn never saw him eat at home in his damn life. He’s not as much as a messy eater as Thorkell, that man had no mercy at the dinner table it was disgusting how nonexistent his manners were (not that Thorfinn had any either) but there’s no way he learned up proper dining etiquette in one night and mastered that skill so easily.

He’s really trying to please this old fart.

Askeladd took Thorfinn’s handkerchief and tossed it in his lap, “you used that to wipe your hands.” he said, irked. “Might not be how we do it at home but get used to it, and smile a little, would you? Sweyn doesn’t need to know you got a stick shoved up your ass.”

“Choke.” Thorfinn glowered, taking a sip out of his water. Askeladd chuckled, easily answering to something Sweyn was talking about, “yes, yes of course!”

Canute was a slow-eater, and reminded Thorfinn of a snail the way he sliced through his duck breast. Thorfinn wasn’t supposed to finish his entire plate, because Askeladd warned him to slow the Hell down.

The dinner dragged on for way longer than it needed to be.

Askeladd and Sweyn just keep fucking talking about bullshit. Thorfinn fidgeted, relieved when they handled the bill and rounded up to leave the place. They’re still talking, though. He noticed Canute looking at him.

“What?” he glared.

“N-Nothing. Just. Why are you not…?”

“I said I’m not wearing a suit.”

“That’s against the dress code here.”

“You got a problem with that?”

“Thorfinn!” Askeladd placed a hand on Thorfinn’s back, and he clapped it hard. “Bonding already, I see!”

“ _We’re not._ ” Thorfinn scowled, shoving his hands in his pockets. He pretty much just insulted his greaser get-up. They probably still allowed him in because of Sweyn, but at least he managed to slip past dress code formalities. He didn’t do fancy dinners. Thorkell preferred to go to Red Lobster.

“I thank you for attending this dinner with us. Canute and I are extremely pleased.” Sweyn told them both. “And Thorfinn, you and Canute should get acquainted with each other. I’m sure he’d be happy to make new friends. He’s quite popular.”

Thorfinn barely paid attention to anyone to pick up on that fact— let alone the fact that Canute went to his school. He looked like he went to a catholic school, or a private, at least. What the Hell’s he doing at Vinland? It didn’t add up. Not with his clean image and record.

Canute cleared his throat, eyeing Thorfinn. “Thorfinn.” he said, curt. “I’ll… I’ll be seeing you.”

“I won’t.” Thorfinn replied with a scoff, then he walked away. Askeladd’s apologizing to Sweyn with a laugh, saying he’s also _shy_ and didn’t know how to communicate with peers his age because he didn’t get along with them too much.

For some reason, Thorfinn could still smell the jasmine from when he took Canute’s coat from him earlier.

It smelt nice.

He was absolutely disgusted, admitting that at all.

This dinner was a waste of time alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: bro idk this was a spontaneous idea but if you guys like it maybe???? i'll keep going with this.
> 
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> 
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	2. Being a model student is suffering

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which they start rolling out with the grand plan but Thorfinn needs to do his part, which he's already so terrible at.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys rlly seemed to enjoy this so I started writing the second chapter akjdknfjkns WELL there's many paths and ideas I have in mind where to take this now and I'm just formulating it in some coherent order as I go!!

“I did the fucking dinner thing.”

Askeladd quickly turned around and looked back at Thorfinn, panicked. “Could you at least wait until we’re out of earshot—” he flashed a smile and waved at Sweyn and Canute, who were talking to their chauffeur. “We can’t let him know that we clearly don’t give two shits about this dinner.”

Thorfinn shouldn’t be surprised, and yet he was anyway. Their car was brought to them and he’s just staring flatly at Askeladd.

“What?” Askeladd’s acting as if there was nothing wrong with what he said.

“ _Can you explain why the fuck you brought me here?”_ Thorfinn vexed. “Why’d you even bring me here at all?!”

“I mean, still was important.” Askeladd snorted. “Fake it ‘till you make it, right?”

“You don’t even give a shit about this, is what you’re saying?”

“Of course, son!”

Thorfinn’s permanent scowl deepened.

“Listen— Sweyn’s offerin’ me this _reeeeeally_ big promotion.”

Thorfinn laughed. Not out of genuine entertainment— he barely laughed at anything that wasn’t out of spite. It was hysterical.

“That’s new.”

“You know my last thing landed us in hot water, and then we pinned the blame on Frode and he got sent to jail for it but I also lost my job. Then Bjorn helped me out from gettin’ my ass behind bars. Remember that?”

“No I remember when you guys conned people and fucked them over I think. Your point is?”

“Think about how rich I can be once I get this position as president and COO. I have to actually consider being a good person for this, admittedly, which is something that’s a bit of a challenge for me. But Sweyn likes me.”

“You still never explained what I have to do with any of this.” Thorfinn said. “I don’t care if you need a stupid promotion, I did what you asked, I want that motorcycle.”

“Whoa!” Askeladd laughed, “slow down there, Thorfy. C’mon, you need to put a little more work in than a work dinner.”

Thorfinn’s eyebrows furrowed. “The fuck do you mean?”

“You and Canute seemed to hit it off back there.”

“...No.”

“That’s a start. Come back to me once you two start minglin’ better.” Askeladd said with a coy wink, “if you know what I mean.”

Thorfinn immediately knew where this was going. “I’m not making friends with a rich kid.”

“Then you won’t get that motorcycle.”

“I’ve been wanting that for years, asshole! You promised you’d do it!”

“I can’t get that promotion if Canute doesn’t become your best buddy.” Askeladd shrugged, “sorry ‘bout that.”

_Motherfucker._

Thorfinn’s going to rip Askeladd a new one. If the bastard’s going to con him out of this at least come up with better terms and conditions.

So great. He had to become friends with Sweyn’s pretty little rich kid. It _sounded_ easy. Only if it weren’t for the fact that Thorfinn had trouble making friends with everyone.

Bjorn came over to make breakfast next morning and Thorfinn sat at the kitchen table, glaring at him.

Bjorn slid a plate of bacon, eggs, sausage and pancakes Thorfinn’s way. “‘Sup kiddo?” he already knew that Thorfinn had something on his mind even if this wasn’t all that different from his normal facial expression. He just communicated with everyone that way— and slowly the family picked up on his little quirks and tidbits. It made it better for him if he needed to say shit that was on his mind easier and Bjorn understood.

“Askeladd’s blackmailing me.”

Said bastard’s also in the shower, still— singing very loudly from upstairs. Bjorn’s usually the one who’s ready and had to wait for him while he made breakfast and waited to drop Thorfinn off.

He’s also the reason why he missed first period class, sometimes the first two, _half of the time_.

“What’d he do this time?” Bjorn asked knowingly. He’s almost apologetic. Almost.

“You know about that promotion.”

“Oh. Yeah. With Sweyn?”

“He made me go to a dinner yesterday so I can meet his kid.”

“Usually when Askeladd does anything it’s to benefit himself and not other people.”

He got it. Thorfinn clicked his tongue. “I won’t get a motorcycle if I don’t make friends with his kid.”

“Lemme guess,” Bjorn set down a glass of apple juice on the table for Thorfinn, which he drank out of immediately to calm his nerves. “No motorcycle if no promotion.”

“More like I don’t get it if I don’t be friends with his stupid kid.”

“How’s he like?”

“Uh.” Thorfinn was about to say stupid, because he called everything stupid. Instead, his brain decided to rewire itself to say _“pretty.”_

He’d bang his head against the table and kill himself before saying that out loud. “I don’t know.” Thorfinn’s lips jutted in a pout, “we barely spent more than… two hours together. And we didn’t even talk much.”

In case you counted taking off his coat and being surprised he went to Vinland, the little conversation they had where Canute insulted him for looking like a greaser— that’s the most Thorfinn can go off of. “He’s a preppy rich kid and acts like one.” he settled with that.

Bjorn shrugged, “should be easy.” the table got set up with so much finesse Thorfinn almost forgot the extra plate was for the bastard singing George Michael in the shower, the same fucking song every week.

Another five minutes passed and they’re both already done with their food when Askeladd came skipping down the stairs— he’s not even fucking dressed all the way, he’s just got his slacks on, shirt and blazer slung over his shoulder like this was the boys’ locker room or some shit.

“This is the fucking kitchen.” Thorfinn blanched.

Askeladd ignored him. He whistled, “damn big bear, could already smell it from upstairs and I couldn’t resist!”

Thorfinn wanted to throw up his apple juice at the sound of that nickname.

“At least come downstairs when you’re not fucking half-naked.” Thorfinn glared.

Bjorn laughed, clearing up their table aside from Askeladd’s plate that hadn’t been touched yet. “He’s got a point.” he grabbed a washcloth hanging off the rack and Thorfinn just had to be watching the exact moment Bjorn playfully whipped it at his ass. “Eat your damn food ‘fore it gets cold, Asky.”

“God, what the fuck.” Thorfinn’s stuffed but he felt like he lost his appetite entirely. “Could you hurry the fuck up so I can go to school?”

Askeladd slipped on his shirt, “didn’t know you were this eager to go to school when you’d be begging me to let you stay home for the day.”

“Yeah, well—” Thorfinn stopped, Bjorn casually buttoning up Askeladd’s shirt for him, _“it’s different this time_.” he snapped. He can’t stand another fucking second here.

“Somethin’ important?” Bjorn asked, and neither of them seemed to notice Thorfinn’s discomfort when he fixed Askeladd’s tie for him.

“Wait, I get it!” Askeladd cackled, “you finally decided to try out for football!”

“Fuck no.” Thorfinn said. He already told them he wasn’t interested in any of the sports there when they basically fought each other for sport every morning and liked to go hunting out in the woods in their freetime and do basic hunting activities. If anything, that wore them the fuck out as it was more than running around with a football and smashing into someone else’s skull would.

“Good. It’s for pussies.” Bjorn agreed. Askeladd threw on his blazer and joined Thorfinn at the table.

“They should just bring back dueling.” Askeladd said. “Kinda like— what’s that French sport—”

“Italian.” Bjorn gently corrected him. “Fencing.”

Askeladd snapped his fingers, “don’t even see the fucking difference,” he muttered.

“One is French, and one is Italian.” Thorfinn elaborated, miffed. “No way I’m doing that shit either.” He wanted to inflict pain on people with an actual sword than whatever the fuck a fencing stick was meant to be.

“See, they’re gettin’ there. But it’s too mild. Not much action.”

“You still like to watch football anyway.”

“It’s different! People actually attack each other! _And_ do damage!”

“We do that every year when we go on family hunting trips.” Thorfinn said.

“I remember when one of Bo’s buddies broke his spine when Thorkell gave him that backbreaker.” Askeladd recalled, “left him in the hospital for months.”

“You stabbed Sten in the stomach.” Thorfinn added blandly.

“Hmm, at least he didn’t die.”

 _“This time._ ” Bjorn punctuated flatly.

“We should bet on the worst injury for this year’s.” Askeladd grinned at his colleague, who gave him a cautious look.

“I think we should prevent it.” Bjorn countered.

“Oh, big bear, you’re no fun! Who _moderates_ things these days?”

“You, when you said that I should be the moderator in case we kill someone on the hunting trip.” Bjorn answered.

Thorfinn picked up his bag, shrugging on his jacket. “Whenever you two are done whining I’m like, thirty minutes late.” He finished the rest of his juice and left the kitchen table, slinging his bag over his shoulder.

“Okay, remember kiddo.” Askeladd reminded him, “smile. Say hi. Wave, even. Y’know, people do that to other people because it’s called communicating like a normal human being.”

“Eat a dick.” Thorfinn parroted back.

“Socialize.” Bjorn clapped him on the shoulder. “Asky wants that promotion. So do him a solid.”

“I’m only doing this for the motorcycle you promised.”

“Yeah, well, make me proud.” Askeladd said, “...oh yeah, that also means you gotta stop fightin’ people and shit. As much as it’s funny to hear parents complain you pushed their kid into a garbage can.”

Thorfinn frowned, “what do you expect me to do if they say shit about me?”

“Easy.” Bjorn shrugged. “Ignore it.”

“That’s… easily the most bullshit advice I’ve ever heard from either of you.” Even Uncle Thorkell would agree that’s bullshit, given he’s a teacher and was meant to be a role model to other children he knew they had a knack for trying to commit homicide against each other and thought whatever the reason may be was absolutely valid. Within moderation, of course. That was still a _job_.

“Sweyn ain’t that much of an airhead, he’s gonna wanna make sure you’re legit. Considerin’ he wouldn’t just let his kid hang around anyone.” Askeladd said, “I might’ve said that he has every reason to trust you.”

Bjorn snorted, “which is a damn lie.”

“Shh!” They’re still in the fucking parking lot and Askeladd was acting as if there were people other than loud teenagers in their cars bumping to their speakers were listening into what he had to say, “Look, kid, can you pretend to be a model kid for like. I dunno. For as long as this shit pans out?”

“Do I look like I can be a model kid to you?” Thorfinn questioned sincerely. Look at his record. He might as well be a perfect candidate for the slammer.

“Whaddya think?” Askeladd asked Bjorn, because he didn’t know the answer to his question himself. Thorfinn rolled his eyes. “I mean— we— we basically brought ‘im up—”

“Fuck no.” Bjorn wheezed, and Askeladd cackled too. The two men laughed _at_ him and Thorfinn was genuinely confused.

“Okay.” Thorfinn opened the door.

“Wait— wait— hold on, hold on.” Askeladd stopped chuckling, and Thorfinn shut the door.

“What.” He refused to look at them. He didn’t even know why he took offense to failing to look like a model student when that was never his intention in the first place.

“...well I’d be lying straight to your face with the pep talk that deep inside you’re a good kid, because we know the answer to that already.” Askeladd said, “well, forgettin’ that bullshit, ‘cause I’m a much cooler dad than that—”

“—no you’re not—”

“—you want that Harley?” Askeladd leaned in and pointed a finger at Thorfinn’s face, “do not blow this shit for us.”

“He could live without the promotion.” Bjorn said, “not that serious.”

“Big bear!” Askeladd whined, “can’t you see I’m giving Thorfy genuine pep talk! Y’know, like how a dad should? An _amazing, considerate_ father? _Unlike some people_?”

“I’ve seen Thorkell give better advice to Liv, and she’s like five months old.”

“Aren’t you the _worst_?”

“You made that promise to Sweyn and now you put yourself into this situation. And that dude’s shady as you are.”

“Why do you go along with this?” Thorfinn asked. “Knowing that he always drags me into his shit eventually?”

“Oath.” Bjorn sighed. Askeladd smirked. “Should’ve never made that blood pact, JV.”

Thorfinn was too afraid to ask what that blood pact entitled to. “Good luck.” Bjorn said. Thorfinn left the car in wordless silence.

He came out of that pep talk retaining… zero of the things that were discussed inside that car. One thing, though.

He shared AP English with Canute, and he just happened to share Algebra II.

Also, this was the first time this week he didn’t skip either classes because Askeladd’s dumbass was flirting with Bjorn and caused him to be too late to even bother attending, so he usually spent time in the cafeteria until next class. Thorfinn was wondering where he’d start, given this was such a big school and he saw faces of people he didn’t fucking recognize, ever, every single day.

Ugh, now he had to _remember faces_ now.

His Algebra teacher told him to take off his headphones, given she, unlike his English teacher, gave a fuck when people weren’t engaging in discussion just because they weren’t raising their hand. A no phone policy was understandable, everyone just ignored it. People could smoke weed in the bathrooms and stink up the whole hallway but hoods weren’t allowed to be worn. It’s getting colder, and Thorfinn’s been told to take down his hood more than he could count already— ignoring the glances his sent his way at his brooding energy.

They’re taking attendance and he raised his hand lazily when his name was called, tugging his earbuds through the sleeve of his sweater and placing a hand on his ear— so he could still listen to music on lower volume while class was in session.

“Anyone who fails to put away their devices is getting a zero for participation.” She said sternly. Everyone slowly piped down and put their shit away, but Thorfinn’s much more slick with it compared to these amateurs. Someone already got their phone confiscated shortly after, their classmates snickering among themselves. It’s another loudmouth jock who blatantly lied he wasn’t texting when he was caught red-handed.

Thorfinn’s eyes landed on Canute, sitting two seats in front of him. One row to the right. A comfortable white, wool sweater, hair tied into a messy bun and round glasses perched on his nose, black mary janes on his feet. His friends are talking to him, Thorfinn can’t hear what it’s about. But he’s not speaking at all— not since their teacher made it clear she wanted them to shut the fuck up so she could take attendance and the class could get started, slowly going down the list in alphabetical order.

Thorfinn paused his music because Askeladd sent him a text message about what model Harley bike he wanted.

 **Thorfinn [11:34 A.M]:** im in the middle of class dumbass

 **Fucker [11:34 A.M]:** Like you’re even paying attention.

 **Fucker [11:35 A.M]:** C’mon. It’s for research.

 **Thorfinn [11:36 A.M]:** Can’t tell you right now, gonna get caught

“Sweynson… _Cunt_?” Thorfinn looked up. He saw Canute’s face turn beet-red, and more snickers filtered through the room. Thorfinn included, leaning back. He noticed the other boy turn around nervously, wanting to find the source. Thorfinn leaned back in his chair, smirking a little.

“ _Canute_ , Mrs. Gro.” Canute firmly corrected her.

“Sorry, I can never seem to get these pronunciations right. As far as all of you know it’s still new to the school year and I’m terribly bad with names. Feel free to correct me whenever you can.”

“It’s just spelled a little… different.” One of his friends piped up, a bunch of ass-kissers, really. Running in to defend him when no one really cared to begin with. At least two or three people in every class had to correct their names at the beginning of the year because teachers fucked it up.

Askeladd kept sending him texts throughout class— and believe it or not Thorfinn was getting annoyed because he wanted to _learn_ and do what he _asked_ , and he blissfully ignored it by putting his earbuds back on.

As soon as the bell rang for lunch everyone grabbed their bags, pushed their chairs back and booked it out of the door.

Canute was still grabbing his things, waving at his friends and promising to meet up with them at lunch. He’s right there. Thorfinn could just walk up to him and talk to him.

But whenever he walked up to talk to anyone it was to beat the shit out of them, so that was a challenge, there.

Thorfinn threw his bag over his shoulder, not bothering to push his chair back in.

“Thorfinn?”

_Shit._

He made eye contact with Canute just as he finished a conversation with Mrs. Gro. He looked… _surprised_ to see him, that he attended the class that happened to be the same one he had. Normally, Thorfinn would say hi back. Smile. Wave. Whatever the fuck Askeladd advised.

Instead, he turned his heel and ran out of the classroom like he stole something he shouldn’t. Tailed it out of there all the way to the lunchroom, and fast.

Askeladd’s waiting for him when school was over. Thorfinn noticed Canute leaving with friends, and he rolled his eyes, walking toward the parking lot and out of sight and opening the door.

He nudged Thorfinn on the shoulder, “so how’d it go, huh?”

“I.” Thorfinn thought it’d be good to say the truth this time. But then he didn’t. “Didn’t find time to talk to him.”

“Oh, really?”

“I guess.”

“That’s a shame.” Askeladd hummed, “...well did you at least _see_ him around?”

“Why does that matter?”

“You need to give me specifics! Maybe you just missed him when he stopped by, or something.”

Thorfinn did see him. Not just in the halls, but directly. Face to face. He just panicked and ran off.

“There’s like hundreds of kids that go here.” Thorfinn said, “not easy for me to just expect to magically find the dude there.”

“So you don’t share a class?”

“...We. We do.”

“Which ones?”

“Math and English, also gym.” But he downright skipped gym entirely most days. He’d have to stop doing that, too if he wanted to avoid a shitty looking report card he’d wipe his ass with and smack in Askeladd’s face for forcing him to do this.

“Great!” Askeladd clapped, “that’s a good start. There’s no way you can’t find a way to talk to the kid when you’re in the same room together.”

For fuck’s sake.

“OH,” Thorkell was filled in on Askeladd’s current exploit at home when he came over. Asgeir was working his late shift at the bar again so he couldn’t show up. “Haha, still got it in you don’t cha, Askeladd!”

“Normally I’m not one to boast.” Thorfinn’s fucking holding one of Thorkell’s babies, Astrid, because he didn’t feel like doing it himself apparently. Bjorn’s holding Liv while Askeladd gloated at the dinner table about his grand plan he’s stirred up.

“You’re always boasting.” Bjorn rocked Liv in his arms. At least babies didn’t give a shit about what was going on. Just braincell-lacking beings.

“He wants me to represent the company. I can already feel it.” Askeladd explained, “after the dinner he kept thanking me at work about how much of a good time he had and enjoyed havin’ me around, really thinks I have what it takes to be in this leadership position.”

“Ain’t he like, sick or something?” Thorkell asked.

“His health is just shit because he’s a deadbeat.”

“How the fuck is he still alive, then?” Thorfinn asked curiously. Astrid’s giggling in his ear and he stared at her big, brown eyes, feeling sorry that she had to be raised by someone like Thorkell. Actually, he felt bad for her and Asgeir. They started to get fussy when their father wasn’t giving them too much attention given that he wanted to talk to Askeladd, came into the house with the two kids hoisted up on his shoulders and Bjorn offered to hold Liv and Thorfinn hold Astrid against his will, feed her, and pamper her until the two men are done fucking around.

“He’s rich.” Askeladd said, “the fucker’s got the best doctors in the city tryin’ to keep his ass alive.”

“Can they cure your Alzheimer’s?” Thorfinn asked, and he ducked when a knife was hurled his way, instead, digging into the wall behind him. He smirked. “You missed.” Astrid simply laughed.

“I don’t have Alzheimer’s.” Askeladd muttered.

“But we got tested for it—”

“— _it was wrong_ , Bjorn—”

“—was it really—”

“ _Yes_!”

“How’re you supposed to hunt with us if you’re dying?” Thorkell asked, concerned.

“Who said I was—” Askeladd changed the subject, “okay back to the main point I was talkin’ about, he’s fuckin’ rich and it’s gonna make me a lot of money after I become the president of the company. I can put Bjorn on the board of directors. If he entrusts the business to me after he dies of an aortic aneurysm, guess who fuckin’ owns the company in a few years?”

“You wouldn’t last more than five years in HR.” Bjorn said.

“Not without you!”

“Why can’t you just kill him?” Thorkell asked, “makes the job faster!”

“We need to come up with better plans than making people die under mysterious circumstances.”

“Is he a shitbag to his employees?”

“Absolutely.”

“So kill him.”

“How’s your school principal?” Bjorn asked Thorkell, and Liv started playing around with his long goatee, “hey now!” he stopped her from tugging too hard. She smiled, tugging again.

“Goat beard.” She beamed.

“He’s a pretty cool dude, that’s why I choose not to kill him.” Thorkell said. “Plus, he treats us well and makes sure we do our job right.”

“I’m surprised you kept one.” Thorfinn muttered.

“I’m not doing it for my money, I like kids! Plus it’s a good way to keep ‘em energized and in shape.”

“I’m sorry for them.”

“Do you even trust him running a company?” Thorfinn asked Bjorn.

“Well.” Bjorn sighed. “He’s kinda done it before, except, it just backfired on him.”

“Exactly.”

“Think about this!” Askeladd said, “I’m not talkin’ outta my ass here. I gotta kiss his ass for a little while longer. But I can’t do it if his son ain’t gettin’ sweet-talked by Thorfy here. Said somethin’ about transferin’ from a catholic school ‘cause of some shit and wants a willing, _trusted_ beneficiary to handle responsibilities for the sole protection of his kid since his older brother wants fuck-all to do with the business and branched off to start his own. He needs somebody else.”

“And he chose you because?” Thorfinn questioned.

“Well— he didn’t exactly choose me yet.”

“I like it.” Thorkell said, “‘s not a bad idea.”

“By far the most tame compared to most.” Bjorn agreed. Thorfinn handed Astrid over to Thorkell.

“I got homework.” He said.

“Thorfy!” Askeladd called after him, “need you to give me updates on how it’s goin’ between you and Canute!”

Thorfinn flipped the bird, taking the knife Askeladd threw at him so he could add to his collection upstairs. They’re laughing boisterously upstairs. How are any of them occupied with normal working jobs under their schemes, he had no idea.

He started playing video games after he finished homework, making sure to shove a knife under the door so no one fucking barged in this time and he could have his privacy. Taking a short break and idly scrolling through Instagram on his phone.

He found Canute’s account randomly, and he was about to leave and go back to playing. Curiosity got the best of him, clicking on his username and visiting his account.

Jesus Christ this shit looked like every basic bimbo’s Instagram, only if they belonged to a family dynasty that made bank, and if they looked like a prince more than a model, or both. Not that he considered admitting that. He’s scrolling through fancy pictures, swank buildings, dinner that looked like it cost an arm and a leg to eat but disgusting, pretty selfies, cooking, food, and more selfies.

He scrolled too fast and unconsciously tapped on a photo that was taken a few weeks ago, wanting to throw his phone out the window. _“Fuck_.” Thorfinn swore, he unliked it— pretty sure that would do nothing to undo what he just did.

Fuck Askeladd and his stupid plan.

He kept chickening out whenever he saw Canute in the halls.

One time he might’ve threatened to lunge at him and made him run away from him that time— but it didn’t help they were barely speaking more than a few words to each other.

He didn’t expect Canute to be the one to storm up to him when he was listening to music in the cafeteria, sitting at his usual corner where a group of dickheads liked to play cards at the farthest right near the aisle, as long as it was far away from him and he could eat in peace he didn’t care who sat at the same table.

Everything he did was with elegance, the way he walked, talked, held himself up like he knew he was better than everyone and was being modest about it. Only dickheads do that shit. Thorfinn didn’t even pay him any mind until he saw flats when he stared at the ground.

“If you don’t got anything to say bite your tongue and choke on it.” Thorfinn said.

“What is your problem with me?” His tone was enraged and just not the energy he was expecting to be greeted with this afternoon. Thorfinn hadn’t been bothering anyone the past _week_ — as per Askeladd’s wishes. He’s actually minding his own business, and now the school’s little prince wanted to start shit with him.

“Huh?” Thorfinn tugged off his earphones, and now they’re earning a few looks.

“Ever since we met you’ve been nothing but _rude_ — is that just how your kind—? Your—”

“—My kind.” Thorfinn said, “what’s my kind?” he asked, challenging.

“— _Just!_ You know exactly what I mean, Thorfinn! It’s _mean_ , every single time I’ve tried to politely approach you all you do is answer me with hostility for what reason? Just because _it’s your brand_?”

“Kinda.” Thorfinn shrugged. “Maybe a _hey Thorfinn_ would be nice?”

“Don’t you dare turn this on me.”

“You’re the one who stormed up to me with your panties in a twist.”

“I know you desperately have something to say to me.” Well, shit. He’s not wrong there, either. Being a dick is just an easier approach because socializing was difficult.

“I don’t.” Thorfinn lied. “Nevermind.”

“So I’m supposed to believe whatever grudge you hold against me is non-existent?”

Thorfinn snorted, “fuck, you really talk like you’re in the fucking royal family on a normal basis?”

“Makes sense.”

Now it was Thorfinn’s turn to scowl now, “what does?”

“The rumors about you.” Canute folded his arms, “if you don’t wish to speak to me then say it to me directly.”

“Alright, hey,” Thorfinn nodded at Canute, and there’s a stretch of silence before he said, “fuck off. Come back when you have something nice to say then.” he smirked.

Someone else came up to them, standing close by Canute’s side.

“Something wrong here?” The other boy asked Canute, frowning at Thorfinn with caution.

“No.” Canute said, clearing his throat. “Just wanted to clear up a misunderstanding.”

“You know this guy?”

“I know you?” Thorfinn asked the stranger.

“Edmund,” Canute placed a hand on his shoulder, “it’s fine.”

“Come back to our table, then.” He and Thorfinn had a stare-off before he convinced Canute to walk away with him.

Thorfinn texted Askeladd the type of Harley model he wanted.

 **Fucker [12:10 P.M]:** Aaaaalright, knew you’d come around and trust me. I gotcha.

Thorfinn’s face retracted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: thorfinn tries to do the thing where you make a friend except he's still a little bad at it. bare with him.
> 
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	3. Making a god-awful deal: dating a prep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Thorfinn runs into a certain someone getting robbed on the street after-school. He calls off the deal with Askeladd and decides he'd find a job himself for the bike... instead he ends up getting asked for a super important favor by Canute and drags him back into the whole deal once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I finished chapter three AND four in a mad productive haze lmao

Dr. Davis was a pretty nice lady. Thorfinn’s been visiting her for the past year— he might’ve… nearly attacked the guy before her. He’s still an angry person, but— as Ylva and Helga suggested, he should learn how to manage that anger better.

“You mentioned you recently hit a kid in your class with a chair.” Dr. Davis said. The office wasn’t unbearable. The colors were bland, if anything. Just white walls, brown couch, a few plants around, some pictures of her husband and two kids, both boys. She said they’re kind of like him in a way, so she understands. A little doubtable, but it made sense where she’s coming from.

Thorfinn shrugged.

“Why did you do it?” She questioned.

“Fucker called my hair a mop.”

She’s not like Askeladd— she’s a professional, so she didn’t laugh. She nodded, though, processing that.

“I’d assume what he said provoked some anger in you.”

“‘Course it did. He shouldn’t have said it.”

“But do you genuinely think inflicting harm on others is a way to go about… _expressing_ that anger?” Dr. Davis asked.

Thorfinn bounced his leg, “I just don’t get why punching someone in the face if they make fun of you isn’t a valid response for anything.”

“You have to consider that people react to certain things differently, especially when provoked. It’s perfectly normal to feel offended, or upset, that someone… has _offended_ you in a way you didn’t like.”

“I’m not apologizing for that.” Thorfinn refused.

“Thorfinn, I want you to assess how your actions affect yourself and the people around you.”

Ignoring things was supposed to make you the bigger person, Thorfinn already established he’s not the bigger person if he would rather throw rocks at somebody. “I don’t get your point here.”

“How did it make you feel after you attacked this person?”

“Fucking great.” Thorfinn answered, with little thought. “I wanted to do it again, actually. Then they had to break up the fight, so, that sucked.”

“How do you think it made the other person _feel_?”

“In pain.”

Dr. Davis nodded slightly, then she shook her head. Leaning forward on where she sat on the couch across from his. “...Dig a little more deeper, Thorfinn.”

“Like shit.” Thorfinn said, with barely any effort to use another word for it.

“The objective.” Dr. Davis clarified, “tell me the objective of the action you decided to take against this hostile provocation toward your appearance.”

“Make him feel like shit.” Thorfinn replied. “I mean you don’t go around saying that fucking shit to people and walk away not expecting to get your ass beat.”

“I’m sure from a moral standpoint, the right response wouldn’t be to hurt this person physically. From something that was said to you verbally, that is.”

“My hair doesn’t look like a mop.” Thorfinn countered, defensive. “You don’t think so too, do you?”

Dr. Davis appeared uncomfortable, not wanting to answer the question. “Where I’m getting at is that you need to work on controlling this temper given this situation is considered to be more mild, though your response is reasonable.”

“Don’t see why we can’t just throw chairs at people.” Thorfinn laughed.

“You had to face dire consequences for your past actions, not just this one.” Dr. Davis solemnly reminded him. “What does that tell _you_ , about what needs improvement?”

Well fuck. She’s speaking some facts, here.

He left Dr. Davis’ office, taking a walk to the store so he could get his hands on a cigarette. He just got back from the gym and coming here helped him take a breather and relax because he didn’t want to go home right away most days. Some days, Asgeir’s bar after a session (he only served soda to anyone who wasn’t twenty one, as much as Thorkell coaxed him into serving some hard liquor he didn’t budge when it came to rules regarding alcohol. All ages were still welcome however.) Usually he preferred to smoke them after school’s therapy sessions because Askeladd complained of the house smelling like shit if he smoked in his room. The smell was a bitch to get out by cracking the window open and the whole place would just get stuffy until he felt like suffocating.

There was this gas station down the block, the guy at the store didn’t give two fucks if a robber broke in and asked for the money at the register— and he most definitely didn’t care if Thorfinn asked for a pack of cigarettes. He slid a ten and two singles over the counter. He’s not sure if this was the dude’s exact name, but they called him Chef. They, as in the regulars that often came in here when he did around this time.

They give each other a nod-up, and then Chef handed over the pack of Marlboro.

Thorfinn had a match in his pocket, lighting it up once he left the store. He checked the time on his phone, eight twenty-three flashed on the screen.

Askeladd probably left his dinner on the kitchen table so he could take it upstairs. He stared at the smoke wisping from the rear end of the cigarette, taking his time walking to the nearest bus stop two blocks away. The street lights turned on once dusk hit, a couple cars passed by, people walking to and fro every now and then.

He’s at the end of the block, waiting to cross the street to walk to the bus stop when he saw someone else walking the same direction across the street— then they were stopped by another figure.

Thorfinn casually paid no mind to it, kids from another school down the block often hung around until late to fuck around instead of going straight home like everyone else did. He’d even seen faces from Vinland. He noticed though, that the person was trying to pass after their conversation ended and the other person wouldn’t let him.

The stoplight was still green, cars drove past the intersection. Thorfinn put in his earbuds, slinging his backpack over his shoulders— pulling up one of his playlists and hitting play.

A minute passed, and those two are still talking.

...The more he looked at it, only out of mere curiosity, it appeared strange. The person who was stopped by the other individual stepped back, in such a way that two friends who frequently talked to each other wouldn’t do.

Matter of fact, the sketchy person talking to them didn’t even look like a student at all. Thorfinn examined the gray beanie on his head, the dark, gray flannel…

His thoughts vanished abruptly when the man reached out to grab the other person’s purse.

_Keep walking, Thorfinn._

No wonder why it looked sketchy. The fucker was looking to _rob_ the person.

Thorfinn’s seen all kinds of shit in his neighborhood— all around this city— and he preferred to think as long as he minded his own business he wouldn’t have to deal with shit. It’s enough that the people Askeladd’s pissed off hold him accountable when he had nothing to do with the shit he did, however, this was different.

When he checked his phone, the bus was going to come in another two minutes. He can just cross the street and wait at the bus stop. Let what’s going on pass, and pretend he didn’t see shit.

“Please!” he heard a familiar voice plead, panicked. The stoplight turned red.

Thorfinn tugged out his earbuds, shoving it in his pocket. The streak of luminous blond hair. The black turtleneck, the plaid skirt.

At times like this was when his therapy sessions with Dr. Davis started fucking with his head— even if he knew fully well Askeladd would tell him to whistle his way on out of there if it didn’t benefit him in any way.

“Oh, shit.” Thorfinn walked right past the bus stop completely, and he crossed the street again so he could see what the Hell was going on.

“Is it my money that you want?” Canute asked, Beanie Guy’s irritated, as if it wasn’t fucking clear enough he was trying to mug him. “It is, yes?”

“The fuck do you think?”

“I have more where this comes from.”

“Man, I don’t have time for you to tell me some bullshit! Gimme what’s in the bag.”

“I have a lot of money. I assure you I am not lying to you. I come from a wealthy family. I could easily take you to the bank down the street.”

“You think I’m fucking stupid, bitch?”

Thorfinn wanted to laugh. He’s considering _bribing_ a robber into giving him even _more_ money than he had to offer. The poor guy’s so baffled by the audacity he wasn’t buying into it a single bit.

“Five grand? Six? Seven? We can negotiate.”

“Or I can just take what you’re hiding in the _damn bag_."

Thorfinn could give it to him. Canute’s pretty ballsy to bargain with a crackhead, of all the people he’d have to unfortunately encounter in this neighborhood.

“You can walk away from this with more than I can give right now unless you accept my offer.”

The robber nodded, “I’ll accept your offer.” he said, and Canute looked relieved. Until the fucker pulled out a gun from inside his pants, and Canute immediately stepped back. His hands slowly raised up, apprehensive. “‘Less you gimme that bag, I ain’t doing shit.”

“Sir, please.” Thorfinn was stalking right behind them now, “I can give you both the bag and the money once I’ve withdrawn the money at the bank.”

“I’m asking for it now.” The robber threatened Canute by pointing his gun up at him. “Gimme the bag. _C’mon_!”

Thorfinn flicked his cigarette into the trash bin out of courtesy.

Canute winced, hugging the purse close to his chest. He nodded slowly, handing it over to the man, reluctant. Idiot.

Thorfinn stepped right in-between them just as he had.

“And who the fuck are you?” The robber sized him up, even if Thorfinn stood shorter than he did, he didn’t flinch once the gun was pointed at him. He’d had this shit happen before and there was nothing unusual about it. Canute stepped back again, stumbling on the heels on his feet.

“Thorfinn—” he swayed, voice shrill, “just— just walk away—”

“Give him back the bag.” Thorfinn demanded lowly.

“You heard what he said?!” Sounded like the bastard was at his limit, infuriated due to his lack of patience, “walk away before I blow both your brains out.”

Thorfinn took the gun in his hand roughly, and pressed it against his forehead. His fierce glare was prominent in his eyes, “so you gonna shoot or are you just a pussy?”

The robber didn’t seem to like that one bit, fuming.

“I’ll give you three seconds.”

“Thorfinn.” Canute tried again, stern. “Don’t.”

“Stay out of this, princess.” Thorfinn bit back, his gaze still on the other man’s. “Three seconds. Shoot me, right here, right now.”

The man shoved the gun against his forehead, his face red with rage. Thorfinn could feel his hand shaking.

“Three.” Thorfinn counted down, patient. He stepped closer, and the robber stepped back. “ _Two_.” he had his hands resting in the pockets of his sweats, still.

“You’re not gonna do shit.” The robber laughed, trying to ease his own startled nerves. “I can kill you right here, and right now.”

"One." Alright, Thorfinn gave him a time lapse. He decided to be a dumbass. He had no choice now but to beat his ass. His hands left his pockets and he grabbed the man’s hand with the gun. He’d shot at the air, and Canute ducked down, a pitched gasp leaving his lips— terrified. He smashed his head into the robber’s nose. The impact was hard enough for it to break and bleed, and swiftly shifted behind him, bending his arm back and taking the gun out his hand.

He screamed in pain, Thorfinn taking his arm and lifting him over his shoulder. Slamming his body right on the hard concrete and knocking the air out his lungs. He stomped his sneaker right into his chest and bent down, meeting him at eye-level.

“I gave you three seconds.” Thorfinn said. “If you don’t want him to call the cops, run.” He kicked the gun into the opening that led right into the sewer beneath the curb of the sidewalk, letting go of his arm. He stood up, and lifted his foot off his chest.

The robber scrambled up to his feet. He turned around and ran away as fast as he could. Thorfinn grabbed the purse on the ground.

“Are you stupid?” He threw the bag at Canute, and he struggled to catch it in his hands.

“E-Excuse me?”

“Walking around with a fucking _Gucci_ bag around this neighborhood?” Thorfinn gestured to his bag with a cock of his head, “are you asking to get mugged?”

“ _What_ — I didn’t plan for this to happen!” Canute argued, “and did you not see that _his gun went off_ just a minute ago?”

“It didn’t shoot either of us.”

“He had a gun on him!”

“And I broke his arm and threw it in the sewer before he could do anything with it.” Thorfinn answered, “you gonna call the cops?”

“I _think_ it should be necessary.”

“Don’t bother.”

“ _Why should I listen to you?_ ” Canute asked, arrogant.

“This is coming from the guy who planned to bribe someone who’s mugging him.” Thorfinn snorted, “something tells me you’re more of a natural at this.”

“I was doing it to _save myself_.”

“You rich people are fucked.” Thorfinn said, galling, “Around here you don’t just offer people more money to save your skin. You’re lucky he didn’t shoot you.”

“I didn’t need you to come here.” Canute insisted. It’s so easy to rile him up it was entertaining. “It was working until you intervened.”

“Good to know you preferred to have your brains blasted by someone’s glock.” Thorfinn almost wished he went back to the bus stop. Almost. He realized the bus that was meant to come… already stopped by five minutes ago, and passed right by. “What, are you gonna pay me to keep quiet about it? ‘Cause I don’t want your money.”

“He almost shot you.” Canute said, perplexed. “You’re not even the least bit baffled by the careless thing you did?”

“You clearly don’t live around here.” Thorfinn snorted, “as if this shit doesn’t happen all the time.”

“...You can’t be serious.”

“Ask the guy that was about to run off with your purse. The fuck are you doing in these streets anyway?” Thorfinn asked cautiously. Canute Sweynson was the last person he wanted to run into when him and his little clique gave him nothing but dirty looks in the halls after Canute threw his little tantrum at him in the cafeteria the other day.

“...The soup kitchen.” Canute answered, giving Thorfinn a look. Thorfinn frowned.

“The fuck? The one two buses away from here? On the sixth ave?”

“I’m a volunteer.” Canute replied, haughty. “After school, Wednesdays and Fridays until late.”

“Of course.” Thorfinn scoffed.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“A goody two-shoes like you won’t last a day in this neighborhood if you got yourself mugged already, more than once.” Thorfinn presumed Canute's lack of response told him he was right.

“May I ask what are _you_ doing out while it’s late?”

“None of your damn business.”

Canute raised a brow.

“Gym.” It’s partially the truth. He didn’t have to tell Canute everything. “If it weren’t for your dumbass getting robbed I wouldn’t have missed my next bus.” he checked his phone, which wouldn’t be coming for another _fifteen minutes._

“Not anyone else’s fault but yours.” Canute balked.

“Seriously?” Thorfinn scowled, “I thought _I_ saved _your_ life. Both of ours.”

“Robbers want one thing. If you promise them more than they’re bargaining up against then that immediately gives you the upper-hand.” Canute explained in his favor, “maybe that’s not how it works in your book, but I don’t bluff.”

“Someone as dumb as you would mean it giving away ten grand and all your belongings to a dickhead with a gun.”

“You have fantastic assumptions about what I can or can’t handle, Thorfinn Karlsefni.” Canute bridled.

“God, do I hate you people.” Thorfinn laughed. “Heads so far up your ass you can’t see anything else.” They’re both headed toward the bus stop. He looked at Canute. “You don’t got a driver you’re waiting for?”

“I don’t always need a driver to take me everywhere.”

“You’re not taking the same fucking bus as me, Sweynson.”

“I believe I am, unfortunately.” Canute smiled sweetly at him.

“Sure you’re not sneaking off to your boyfriend’s house instead of a soup kitchen?” Not that Thorfinn didn’t buy the excuse for him being in this part of town. It also sounded too good to be true.

“Who?” Canute asked defensibly.

“The prissy fucktard who follows you around like a lovesick puppy.”

“Edmund’s not my partner.”

“Sure he isn’t.”

“I volunteer out of my own sheer will and because I want to give back to the community. Why I am here has no relations to me and Edmund at all.” He still didn’t answer the question as to whether they’re screwing. Thorfinn would take that as a valid answer.

“You must have a lot of free time on your hands.” He quipped. They crossed the street, and he saw Canute glaring into his soul. Fighting the urge to smirk and feigning disinterest when they reached the bus stop.

“You have a knack of poor judgement!”

“Do you always whine this much?”

He had to spend ten minutes waiting and listening to Canute sputter out nonsense in an attempt to justify himself, most of which Thorfinn didn’t bother listening to.

“—I’m not going to stand here and tolerate your impunity.”

Fancy vocabulary. “Go somewhere else.”

“I also take this bus.”

“I _really_ wish you didn’t.” Thorfinn had to light another cigarette after he threw his last one out.

Canute was staring at him, scandalized.

Thorfinn almost laughed, huffing a breath of smoke in the air. “Want one?”

“I do _not_. That is extremely bad for your lungs.”

“Something has to kill us eventually.”

“And you choose for it to be a cancer stick? Typical.”

“You’d probably choose to die in a silk deathbed?”

Before Canute could answer, the bus approached them. The two of them broke eye contact, Thorfinn dropped the cigarette on the ground this time and crushed it beneath his foot. He went in first and sat down in the back. Canute sat in the front. They both glared at each other from afar, the doors closed.

Canute actually got off two stops before Thorfinn did, he had to take two to get home. He scoffed, watching him get off.

Something about his air of nobility pissed Thorfinn the Hell off.

And _he’s_ the one who got heat for it when Askeladd said that he was fucking shit up for them the following week.

“No, no, no you’re doin’ it all wrong!” Askeladd exclaimed, “ _you’re supposed to charm him_! Not make an enemy out of him!”

“He’s the one who came up to _me_ on his high horse and called me out.” Thorfinn grumbled. Asgeir poured him a can of coke, sitting at his bar after Askeladd picked him up after work was over.

“I wonder why that is.” Askeladd sighed out.

“Trouble in paradise?” Asgeir asked, wiping down a glass.

“Well whatever he’s telling Sweyn, I’m the one who’s gettin’ fucked up the ass for it because you don’t know how to play nice.”

Thorfinn laughed. “Are you fucking serious? He _told_.”

“He thinks you got some kinda personal vendetta against him.”

“Hey hey hey!” Thorkell busted into the bar, Asgeir merely ignored him, so did the other patrons knowing he was very much a regular. He just skipped up to Asgeir and hugged him from behind where he stood at the counter. “Guess who’s back from work?”

“Let me guess, you?” Asgeir served another customer their drink, unfazed. They weren’t as terrible as Bjorn and Askeladd, Bjorn babysitting Liz and Astrid right now, because that he wasn’t here. Most of the time it’d be packed with everyone Thorfinn knew once they clocked out of work and they’d even bring the kids along while they whined and caused a shitstorm. If they didn’t like it Asgeir said the door was right there and they could go to the bar down the block since this was a family friendly place.

“How was school, Thorfinn?!” Thorkell asked, hopping over the counter and asking for a drink himself.

“Shit.” Thorfinn answered. His answer never varied once. He asked for a refill of coke.

“I keep tellin’ you not to blow this shit for us.”

Thorfinn grit his teeth, “he’s the one being the douchebag!” _ugh_ , he was tired of this. “Y’know what?”

“What?”

“Fuck the promise.”

Askeladd laughed, mid-sipping from his drink, “you already agreed to the deal, kiddo.”

“It won’t be my fault if it fucks up for you if I work for it myself.”

Askeladd blinked, “you insisting you’d get a _Harley_ yourself.”

“I have a license.” Which he hadn’t used since he wanted to save it for the bike Askeladd was just taking advantage of him for leverage.

Askeladd laughed, “how do you expect to pay for that without me getting it for you?”

“I-I could get a job!”

“We already know what happened the many times you’ve tried to get jobs, Thorfy.”

Thorfinn snarled, knowing Askeladd was right. “I’m callin’ it quits.”

"Kid I swear to God if Sweyn finds out you're pullin' his kid's hair out you're gonna regret it big time. Do whatever the Hell you want, but don't fuck it up for me. Don't _murder the kid_ , you hear me?"

"I just might." Thorfinn joked. "Oh I just fucking might."

“You’ll agree to it soon enough. I'll give it a week.” Askeladd clapped him on the shoulder. He got a call on his Bluetooth and he perked up, “oh, it’s big bear. Gotta take this.”

Thorfinn watched him walk away. He grabbed his backpack and stood up.

“Where ya goin’?!” Thorkell asked, alarmed. “We’re not gonna arm wrestle tonight before you go at least?!”

“Tired.” Thorfinn remembered to pay for the coke, and then he left the bar.

“I thought Askeladd was your ride!” Asgeir reminded him.

“Taking the _bus_.” Thorfinn hollered from outside.

He’d agree if he was completely bluffing when he said he’ll _find a job_. One job he had at Hot Topic and he threatened to stab a customer with a hanger for calling him a little shrimp. It’s not the first instance he either attacked a customer or an employee, whether it be verbally or physically.

Askeladd had money. He worked for it, maybe what he did wasn’t exactly legal— _but_ , he made money. He worked for the house they currently lived in, the fact that he _looked_ like he had his shit together was exactly why he was trusted to raise Thorfinn in the first place (more like Bjorn was more than Askeladd). He said Thorfinn didn’t even need to work for his own money when he could just ask him for anything.

Except the one time Thorfinn wanted something from him genuinely he took that as an opportunity to blackmail him into getting all cozy with his boss’ son.

He could just ignore Canute and continue being a dick to him when they saw each other. But instead, he noticed that he struggled greatly in Algebra and when they had to pair up for group work he plopped down right next to him— watching him struggle was so embarrassing it was annoying.

“You’re not doing it right, idiot.” He’d said. Polynomials were fucking annoying but Thorfinn understood it whenever he did the work.

“Oh.” Canute said, doubting him with a single miffed glance. “I suppose you’d know how to do it?”

Thorfinn took his pencil from him and solved the problem quickly, breaking it down step by step. Canute’s cheeks slowly flushed with embarrassment. “Ahem. M-Mrs. Gro?”

Their teacher came up to them, and Canute asked her if the problem Thorfinn just did for him was correct. She didn’t even take more than a few seconds to analyze, looking it over before she approved it was.

“Good job Canute!”

“It was me who solved it.” Thorfinn said.

“Oh!” She sounded even _more_ pleased, “well it’s good you can help each other because Canute has a little trouble—”

“— _just a little_ ,” Canute interrupted quickly, timid, “I think I’ve got a grasp of it now.”

“Well group work is to just double check with your classmates to make sure you’re doing it right before we go over it. Unless you’d like to go over one of the problems on the board?”

Thorfinn smirked at how uncomfortable Canute appeared. “Yeah. Go for it.” He egged him on. Canute looked like he wanted to smack him.

“Okay, class!” Mrs. Gro caught their attention. “I’d like some volunteers to answer the questions written on the board!”

A few eager students already stood up, some raised their hands, and Mrs. Gro pointed at Canute. “Canute! How about you do number seven?”

“Um I’m actually not d—”

“Or I can do it.” Thorfinn said blandly. Canute, not wanting his pride to be stepped on, decided he’d go up anyway. He glared at Thorfinn, hesitantly rising from his chair and walking up to the board.

Thorfinn gave it a few minutes before he noticed others students went up and did the problems with ease while Canute clearly struggled. He noticed no one took problem six. Normally, he wouldn’t give a shit about participation. But he just had the urge to mess with him some more, standing up and strolling over to the whiteboard.

“Uh.” The dude next to him handed him the marker. “...Y-You need this?”

Thorfinn took it from him wordlessly and the other boy wandered off to his desk. Thorfinn examined the problem. Damn, this shit was pretty easy. He didn’t need to bring his notes with him like most of them did, solving it within a minute, and he stared over at Canute.

Not all pretty people can do math, it seemed. “I thought you knew how to do this shit.”

“I do.”

Thorfinn watched everyone start going back to their seats. “You haven’t written shit and it’s been five minutes.”

“Not everyone takes the same amount of time to solve a problem, Thorfinn.”

“Everyone’s done but you, though.”

“I don’t need your help.” Canute gave him a sideways glance.

Thorfinn’s going to give it another minute.

“Take your seats.”

He wandered back to his chair, waited. Canute quickly scribbled something down, unable to be finished with his problem. It was time to go over each problem, and it turned out it was _terribly wrong_ and in need of correction.

Every person who volunteered to do a problem was required to write their name down beneath. So, everyone knowingly stared at Canute. He looked back at Thorfinn, sitting back in his assigned seat.

When class was over he’s not the least bit surprised to see his face when he closed his locker.

“I have a proposition.”

“Save it.” Thorfinn shoved his shit in his bag he needed for Government.

“ _Both_ our parents—”

“I’d rather stab myself to death before I call him a parent.”

“Mr. Castus _is_ your father, is he not?”

“No.”

“Guardian?”

“No.”

“T-Then—”

“Not your fucking business, alright?” Thorfinn snapped. Canute refused to back down though, and he stopped Thorfinn from slamming his locker shut, stepping closer.

“Why did you help me?”

Thorfinn shrugged. “It’s basic math.”

“That’s not a valid reason.”

Thorfinn had nothing to say to that. “Forget about it.”

“Mr. Castus and my father want us to… _reconcile_.” Canute said, “Believe me, I perfectly understand what’s going on here.”

“I wish I didn’t.”

“How about we get them off our backs?” Now he was speaking comprehensively. Thorfinn shut his locker, throwing his bag over his shoulder.

“Fuck is your point.”

“Pretend to be my suitor.” Canute answered boldly.

Thorfinn simply turned around and walked away, and Canute scurried after him.

“This is a reasonable opportunity!”

“No way in _fuck_ — am I—” He couldn’t even say it without his cheeks reddening a little, “— _you’re out of your damn mind_.”

“It sounds like you’re on board with this because there’s something you also want out of this.”

“Yeah. _A bike_.” Thorfinn spat, “but I can’t get it because Askeladd’s a dick and you’re too prissy and piss me off too much. I already told him I’m calling it quits.”

“You can’t.”

“Who says you called the rules?”

“Please.” Canute pleaded, “ _listen_ I for one, would rather not do this if it were to last option on Earth—”

“—way ahead of you, blondie—”

“—how about this?” Canute offered, and Thorfinn slowed down. “Anything you ask of me I can fulfill for you. Just agree to this.”

Thorfinn would eat his own fist than to ask Canute for any favors. He could do that shit himself. But. He sized Canute down and the other was uncomfortable. “Anything I want?” he asked, almost considering it.

“I have the right to deny certain offers.” Canute objected.

“You think us doing this would get them to shut the fuck up?” Thorfinn asked.

“Positively.” Canute replied.

“You better be right about this shit.” Thorfinn warned.

“Good day, Thorfinn.” Canute smiled. “Oh, Edmund!” he waved, and he walked to catch up with Edmund talking with a friend as they walked out of a classroom down the hall.

 _Man_ he’s not going to live this shit down once he told the others at home about this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Gudrid and Hild show up as Thorfinn's unlikely new friends through this gay crisis fake-dating journey.
> 
> Follow me where I give updates on this fic, listen to my playlist, and feel free to ask me things on my CC! ❤️
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	4. Congratulations Thorfinn, you've got a boyfriend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Thorfinn gains unlikely friends and they tell him he's got to make this more authentic, and so, he ends up telling the rest of his family and their response is extremely unwanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had this done since last week take it akjsdksndknskjnd

_Jesus fuck_ did his shit family rave over Thorfinn saying that he and Canute _were a thing_.

“Cough up the money, shitbags!” For some reason everyone thought Askeladd’s house was a hostel or some shit— because everyone liked to pile in on random ass nights and freeload as if they didn’t have their own homes and working jobs. Thorkell’s making bets now behind his back, because they all reached into their wallets to pull out bills and smacked it in his hand.

“I told you! I told you eventually he was gonna date somebody!”

“I thought he was incapable of romantic feelings!” Askeladd exclaimed.

“Then you don’t know him as much as I do.”

“None of us saw it coming.” Bjorn agreed, “I mean, Thorfinn getting a boyfriend of all people?”

“ _We’re not actually dating._ ” Thorfinn said for the billionth time, but they just laughed at him.

“Oh, of course!” Thorkell winked, “you kids and your weird mixed signals. You don’t have to hide your teenage problems from us! We’re your family!”

“I'm glad I'm related to fucking none of you people.”

“Aw, that’s not nice.” Askeladd pouted. All they do is drink, laugh, argue at each other or the TV, fart, wrestle violently, earlier they were bodyslamming each other into the coffee table. “The one time we’re actually trying to be supportive of you and you spit back in our faces. Being hormonal is normal! We were extremely hormonal at your age!”

“Not talking about this—” Thorfinn stopped at the kitchen. “Who the fuck _missed the garbage can_ completely?!” They made food and they treated the house like it was a zoo, and he was the one who had to clean it up later.

Thorkell’s hoisting Liv and Astrid on his shoulders, “oh, sorry! Might’ve been me!”

The signature chicken bake Bjorn made for them earlier they just tossed in the sink, forgetting to scrape the leftover shit they didn’t eat into the garbage or on the floor it seemed. Thorfinn was exhausted. Tonight was a school night, and they treated tonight like a house party.

“Good job, kiddo!” Askeladd congratulated him, “I knew you’d come around! You truly do have faith in me!”

Thorfinn escaped upstairs before they could ask him any more embarrassing questions. Ylva had FaceTimed him.

This family couldn’t keep their mouth shut because she asked if it was true.

“I’m hanging up.”

“You’re gonna hang up on your own sister?!”

“Yeah.”

“I just wanna know if it’s true!”

“I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“Mom knows anyway.” She said smugly.

“Who the fuck even told you guys?!”

“...Maybeeee Asgeir.” She laughed sheepishly, “hey, dude, I’m not gonna grill you for it. I don’t… have anything _bad_ to say.” he already called bullshit on that.

“It’s not actually real.”

“Yeah when I heard you were dating a rich kid at school I couldn’t bring myself to remotely believe you were one-hundred percent on that. But also, _why_ —” Ylva shook her head, “Do I wanna know, actually?”

“No.” Thorfinn deadpanned.

“Sometimes I’m glad I’m off to college and I’m literally just, blissfully unaware of anything that goes on unless mom tells me.”

Certain times like this Thorfinn wanted what she had, but also— education was a sham and the bane of his existence. But he’d be disappointing his mother if he said he’d run away to the desert and abandon living among civilization entirely than get a history degree.

“Tell me about him, at least!”

“I suddenly have a shit ton of homework to do.”

“What— since when do you even— _Thorfinn—!_ ”

Thorfinn hung up the call.

It was only a matter of time before people started talking. Especially when Canute came up to him in the halls in bright spirits, boldly wrapping his arms around him in a tight embrace. The jasmine Thorfinn smelled made him feel nauseous, the nervous kind.

He was getting _looks_ for the _wrong_ reasons. He’s always getting looks because of who he was as a person— but this was different.

Whenever he’d ask what the fuck Canute thought he was doing, he’d just smile at him and say he’d meet him in class, or after. His _friends_ were congratulating him. Everyone except Edmund, that was— and it was almost hilarious to see his discomfort and how Canute would pretend that nothing was going on at all. The way he’d start asking Thorfinn for help in Algebra when he was having trouble, albeit still begrudgingly, there was still some sort of _petty rivalry_ that one of them could be the first to go up to the board and write the problem correctly and Thorfinn beat him to it every time.

He still refused genuine help, though. He’d bluff that he got the hang of it. He didn’t.

In the cafeteria Thorfinn remained sitting alone in his usual spot because he refused to sit with Canute’s rich friends that kissed each other’s asses and dealt with Edmund asking dumbass questions. _He’s just cautious_ , he said. Sounded like something a boyfriend would do. But Canute kept claiming he wasn’t.

Two girls came strolling up to his table. One was a girl with short blond hair, what looked like a white, bandaid-styled eyepatch on her right eye. The other with dark hair, up to her shoulders.

“Cool eyepatch, Hild!” One of them called after her teasingly. She punched him in the shoulder and his friends howled with laughter at him screeching in agony.

“Next time it’s going for your balls.” She threatened.

“Jesus, Hild!” Her friend hauled her over, “I think one punch in the shoulder is enough.”

“I’ll give him another if he keeps it up.” She rolled her eyes. The two sat down at Thorfinn’s table, and he looked up from his phone where he was playing a game of Tetris on it.

“Hey.” The dark-haired girl caught Thorfinn’s attention. “Is it true?”

“What is.”

“Y’know…?”

“That you’re dating Canute.” Hild finished for her.

This was the first time anyone bothered to ask that. “Why?” Thorfinn asked, growing nervous, “who the fuck told you?”

“...Told us what?” Hild’s friend (or at least, Thorfinn supposed, judging by how close they seemed) asked.

Thorfinn eyed them warily, “What do you know?”

“We just call bullshit—” The other girl nudged Hild on the shoulder, “— _what_? You agree there’s _no way_ the guy who’s been suspended like a dozen times from other schools is dating the school’s prince.”

“Whatever anyone’s telling you is bullshit.” Thorfinn muttered.

“Everyone knows your reputation.” Hild said.

“If you’re here to interrogate me, fuck off.” Thorfinn said. He was about to move when the dark-haired girl grabbed his bag and left it in place.

“I’m Gudrid!” She chirped, cheerful. So cheerful in a way that no one’s ever acted toward Thorfinn, ever, if he could recall. “This is Hild.”

“Why are you introducing me—”

“ _Sorry_ if we seemed abrupt earlier.” Gudrid laughed sheepishly, “but we’re _really_ curious. We have government together, right?”

“What do you want?” Thorfinn asked.

“Nothing.” Hild glared, “c’mon, Gudrid, let’s go.”

“I promise you we’re not interrogating.” Gudrid insisted. “But. We just. Wanna. Know.”

“How the fuck is that not interrogating?”

“God,” Hild sighed out, “because people are gonna call on your fucking bullshit. Sweynson wouldn’t date you in a million years. Especially after he literally just broke up with Edmund last year.”

Thorfinn was listening now. He went bug-eyed. “What the fuck.” he said. “You two are fucking with me.”

“How long you been new here for?” Gudrid asked.

“Maybe like a fucking month?” Thorfinn said. “I _joked_ about the guy being his boyfriend but I didn’t think they were an actual thing.”

Lunchtime was over before Thorfinn could ask more of anything.

“We’ll tell you another time.” Gudrid patted Thorfinn on the shoulder, “nice meeting you!”

“Wait—”

Pretty much everyone was leaving now.

He leaned back against the wall.

Now he had no choice but to spark a conversation with more people.

After the gym he tried to slip home late unnoticed, because Askeladd and Bjorn’s buddies liked to crash after dark. It didn’t help that the dickhead had some sort of Thorfinn detector for when he slipped inside the house.

“ _Thooooooorfy_ —”

“Die.”

“Hey you should bring Canute over sometime! We’d love to meet him!”

“No.”

“There’s leftover rice on the stove.” Bjorn reminded him. They’re shouting at the television and at this point Thorfinn accepted this as casual background noise.

The kitchen was a fucking mess. There’s a stack of dishes in the sink and the stove looked like a bloodbath with stew all over. Animals. God-awful animals.

Askeladd skipped into the kitchen to open the fridge.

“Did you guys wrestle in here?”

“Yeah… we did, help us out later and clean this up?” Askeladd requested, sheepish. Thorfinn would refuse but no one bothered to lift a finger when they crashed and raided the wine cabinet, and then proceeded to pass out on his floor until they had to get up and leave the next morning. He took a can of beer out of it, “so was there no luck in finding a job?”

“I’m still looking.” Thorfinn grumbled. He needed one, too, so he took one out and cranked the can open.

“The deal’s back on.”

“No it’s not.”

“Did you just wanna date the boss’ son for some random reason?” Askeladd cackled, “I thought it was a play!”

“I’m doing this for my own reasons. Who knows when you’ll actually get that promotion and I’m sure as fuck not waiting that long for it.”

“You’re livin’ like a real Castus.” Askeladd said. “Invite him over. Keep it up.”

“Asky they just _scored_!” Thorkell shouted from the living room.

“Shit.” Askeladd turned around, “Motherfucker, why didn’t any of you say anything?!” he rushed back into the living room.

He needed to talk to those girls he met today again.

It turned out that Thorfinn didn’t need to actively seek out Gudrid or Hild because Gudrid had _come after him_ after class.

He was confused. Usually he left class without speaking a single word to any of his classmates given they didn’t speak to him.

“Hi!” She smiled, “hey can you remind me again what the assignment was for next class? I spaced out big time.”

“Textbook pages forty-three to forty-eight.”

“Five pages?!”

“Yeah.”

“Aw man. That’s just so much!” She whined.

Thorfinn actually found himself agreeing with her. “Right?”

“Hey Gudrid!” Some faces whom she knew she greeted back heartily, giving some guy a high five, hugging someone briefly. Thorfinn awkwardly walked beside her, her eyes sparkled when she saw Hild leave a classroom and approach them looking more dead inside than ever.

“Tell me why I was threatened detention for pulling Drake’s chair back when he wasn’t looking.”

“You didn’t.” Gudrid gawked. Hild smirked. They high-fived each other.

“He definitely deserved it. Sexist piece of shit.”

“The quarterback?” Thorfinn asked curiously.

“Yeah.” Gudrid said. “Also the absolute worst. Tried to ask me out as a joke freshman year.”

“Didn’t you shove his friend’s face into a locker?” Hild asked Thorfinn.

He couldn’t remember faces for the life of him. “I might’ve.”

“If you need someone to beat the shit out of, he's one of them. I highly recommend it.”

“Hey, uh,” Thorfinn looked around. They’re about to pass Canute down the hall when he spotted him.

“Thorfinn!” He waved. Thorfinn could only give a quick nod before he grabbed Hild and Gudrid’s hands in a panic.

Hild frowned. “The Hell are you doing, Karlsefni—”

Thorfinn dragged them far down the hall where he was sure no one would be listening. “Okay, both of you shut up. You have to promise me _you won’t tell anyone_ about this. Not a fucking word or I’ll kill you both.”

“Not if I kill you first shitbag—” Gudrid stopped Hild, listening intently.

“What?”

“We’re not actually dating.” Thorfinn said.

“Hah, so this is a freeloading off rich person opportunity?” Hild asked, “I never would’ve guessed.”

“There is a reason behind this, right?” Gudrid asked.

“No it’s his fucking dad that wants this shit and he asked. Uh. Well. He’s not exactly _my_ dad but I _do_ live with him, also wants this. Then Canute asks if we can act like we’re dating to get them off our backs.”

“That is a terrible idea.” Hild said.

“Yeah, thanks. I don’t know a fucking thing about this dating shit but he said he’d do what I ask.”

“Edmund’s not gonna like that.” Gudrid told him. “They dated all throughout junior year and then suddenly they just broke it off, and everyone was so shocked. Canute says they’re still good friends.”

“We’re pretty sure he hasn’t gotten over him yet.” Hild said.

“I have to hold up my end of the fucking bargain somehow.” Thorfinn told them, it’d be stepping over his own pride to immediately back the fuck out of this when his family’s betting on this relationship working out in favor of him and Askeladd.

“Make it believable.” Gudrid suggested. “That… might mean that you have to be a little more open to Canute’s social clique, prepare for lots of people to ask questions, and not be this… mysterious brooding adversary who hates everyone. That’s like, the energy you give off.”

“Who? The fucking rich kids?” Thorfinn asked.

“They’re not bad people!” Gudrid said defensibly, “What’s wrong with them?”

“They exist.” Hild answered. “Act like everyone who isn’t them is the plague and acknowledge you exist only if they want something from you. Of course we hate them.”

"Fuck." Thorfinn clicked his tongue. "So should I call it quits?"

"How long has it been?" Gudrid asked, "two weeks?"

"...is that long enough?"

"You barely even gone past a month." Hild said. "I think you should _at least pretend_ you give a shit."

Thorfinn thought about it.

The diner he went to was two blocks away and the one place downtown everyone liked to go to after school. He preferred to come here later when everyone's already gone home.

And they happened to have killer milkshakes.

The door opened, and he didn't look away from the window until he saw Canute remove his jacket and fold it in his hands neatly, sitting down across from him.

"Thorfinn."

"You were supposed to be here like five minutes ago."

"My apologies. Student government responsibilities." Canute said, and he was given a menu by the waitress who flashed a sweet smile. He bothered to _order_ something for himself, another milkshake. "I too would like something." He said defensively.

They waited until Canute received his strawberry milkshake.

"Had to tell your boyfriend you got business to attend?" He tried not to smirk at the way Canute glared at him.

"He was a bit _reluctant_ , but he was alright with me leaving."

"Don't worry." Thorfinn said, "I bite. Hard."

Canute dropped his bag beside him. "Why do you require my presence here?"

"We need to establish some rules if we're about to do this."

"I thought we already agreed to this sometime ago."

"That was your idea." Thorfinn said. "Now here's my terms. We can't tell anyone about this."

"No one that I talk to on occasion knows this."

"I'm not good with this so none of that… mushy gross shit."

"Which entitles?"

"You're gonna make me fucking say it?" Thorfin asked, aghast.

"I would _suppose_ two people in a… romantic relationship don't necessarily… _have_ to engage in those activities." Canute said. Referring to the people who loved to casually suck faces in the hallway like they'll never see each other again.

"Great." Thorfinn clipped. "We say we're… _in_ a relationship. Cool with your friends and you're fine with whoever I talk to." Undoubtedly isn't much until this past week.

"Would we have to come up with an elaborate excuse?" Canute asked, "...would we say it's believable for someone else that I just happened to fall for the infamous Thorfinn Karlsefni's charms?"

"Whatever shit floats your boat. I don't give a shit." Thorfinn said. "And if they don't believe it let's say I." He couldn't say it without biting his own tongue.

Canute smiled a little, sportive. "You courted me first?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"We could work with that."

"If my _family_ ," he admitted begrudgingly, "they're technically not, but we're gonna go with that— don't ask— wants to see you and shit, you're gonna have to go along with it."

"Is that all?"

"Enough of that weird touchy stuff that you do." Thorfinn said, "not. Uh. Not much of a hugger."

Canute played around with his straw, "what would you prefer that I do then?"

"None of it. It's not grade school."

"It's not _childish_ to be _affectionate_ , Thorfinn." Canute chided, "now it's only fair if I come up with my own set of rules."

"What? No. I asked you to come so I can tell my own fucking rules."

"It's only fair I set _boundaries_ if I am to do anything you say." Canute said. Thorfinn wasn't going to argue with that.

"My uncle Ragnar is also my tutor. His teaching methods I have a hard time understanding. _You_ seem to be quite skilled at math."

"You want me to be your _tutor_." Thorfinn said. "I've never tutored anyone a day in my life."

"But you're good at math, yes?"

"Average at best."

"You mark the highest out of everyone on most exams." Canute observed. "I've seen your scores. No one bothers to look but I see the way Mrs. Gro praises you. For someone who lacks severely in attendance you make up for in your schoolwork." He leaned closer, "I could use a brain like yours, and that's unfortunate, coming from myself."

Thorfinn shook his head, "you could ask anyone else."

"It'd earn extra points in my father's favor if it were my potential suitor." Canute smirked. "Who just happened to be mediocre at best in _everything else_ , but he would see fit."

He brought a good bargain to the table.

Askeladd was more than happy to find out that Canute was coming over.

Except him and Thorfinn spent more time roughhousing than setting up the table,

"I swear to God if you _fuck this up for me_." Thorfinn threatened.

"Big bear, do you remember which shelf where I put the baby pictures?" He pushed Thorfinn's head away as he tried to lunge at him.

"Think it's in the glass cabinet where you shoved all the photo albums." Bjorn said, "Hey Thorfinn, Canute doesn't have any allergies does he?"

" _Askeladd_." Thorfinn smacked his hand off.

" _Or_ should I get the old VHS tapes from Ylva and Helga—"

The doorbell rang. They stopped wrangling each other. The chicken bake's done cooking and Bjorn ignored their fighting, sliding his oven mitts on and opening the oven door. Askeladd and Thorfinn made a break for it to the front door, and he shoved Thorfinn out the way so he could open it first.

He's going to play dirty, huh? Thorfinn dragged the chair from the dining room.

"Canute!" Askeladd welcomed him inside. "So good to see you! Made it just in time!"

"Hello, Mr. Castus." Canute had a gift in his hands. "I brought these. I made them myself."

"Oh? What's these. Smells good."

"They're cookies—" Canute yelped when Thorfinn smashed the chair into the side of Askeladd's head.

" _You little motherfucker_ —" Askeladd dropped on his knees, Thorfinn tossed the chair aside. He's panting a little, shutting the door behind Canute.

"Ignore him." Thorfinn said. "He's a piece of shit."

"Is he—" Canute spluttered, "—is he okay—?"

"Hey." Bjorn nodded at him from the kitchen. "Nice to meet you. You've met Askeladd and Thorfinn. I'm Bjorn. Askeladd's co-worker."

"O-Oh. Hello there." Canute ducked his head. "Pleasure to meet you, Bjorn."

"Mind bringing that chair back?"

Askeladd stood up, blood running down his scalp. "Ay yai yai, sure thing. You almost broke this one, too." He sighed at Thorfinn. "You know how many chairs we've used to hit each other with?" He asked Canute.

"You're bleeding." Canute reminded him, alarmed.

"This ain't anything." Askeladd shoved the chair back at Thorfinn. "Put it back." He smacked him on the side of the head lightly. Thorfinn scowled back at him. Askeladd cackled, going to the kitchen to fetch a napkin and wipe the blood on his head. It was as if Thorfinn hitting him with a chair didn't make him budge at the slightest. Canute left the cookies on the coffee table, puzzled whether he should ask where was the best place after what he just witnessed.

"They're not co-workers." Thorfinn said, Canute removing his jacket and hanging it up on the coat rack, proceeding to toe out of his shoes.

"Pardon?"

"I think they're fucking."

The look on Canute's face made him smirk deviously.

"What makes you—"

"—you'll see. Let's just hurry this up." Thorfinn muttered.

He had to listen to Askeladd tell Canute one his trademark stories about how a man's nearly killed him at a Black Friday sale while they were eating.

"You wanna know what it was over?" Askeladd asked.

Canute didn't realize he was asking him to actually guess. "Was it a television?" It's the fact that he sounded intrigued was what was confusing. But he played his part well. Thorfinn had to deal with hearing this shit a billion times.

"Toilet paper." Bjorn answered for him. That's where he and Askeladd started laughing their asses off. Thorfinn poured more water into his glass and leaned back. He's tempted to smash it over one of their heads.

"Something to wipe your ass with this fucker tries to _stab_ me for it. Kept a whole pocket knife. Went on about how he's served for ten years and how he should be treated with respect. No fuckin' way I'm gonna give up this roll so you can wipe your greasy ass."

"Just a _single_ roll?"

"Just one!"

"Tore open the whole pack and everyone just went back wild." Bjorn explained. "It's a war zone."

"Ever experienced a sale, Canute?"

"None that I've ever dated to experience in person."

Askeladd laughed. "Good choice. But if you do, bring a pocket knife. Stab someone good enough to make them immobile and take what you can get, don't hesitate to beat the shit out of someone who steals it from you and gives you a shit excuse as to why they should have it. It's bullshit. No one believes that tactic except for pushovers."

"I'm not sure if that'd be ethical."

"If you really want something, break someone's arm for it."

"That also mean finding the person who stole the last lawnmower on sale and shitting on their front lawn?" Thorfinn deadpanned.

"Precisely!"

"That's. Very _bold_." Canute commented.

"It also earned me a lawnmower." Askeladd said. "Take initiative."

"I'll be sure to… to keep that in mind, Mr. Castus."

"Mr. Castus? C'mon, makes me feel old. Askeladd is fine."

"You _are_ old, you _fuck_." Thorfinn said crisply.

"So, Canute. How's school treating you?" Bjorn asked.

"Very well. It's nice, and I'm more accustomed to it than I thought I would be. I'm not entirely adjusted yet but I'm getting there. I'm also in the school's student government."

"Student government, you hear that Thorfy?" Askeladd praised, intending to mock him as per usual. "People who wanna do good things for their school and put _effort_ and take advantage of their extracurricular activities."

Thorfinn tossed the knife by his plate Askeladd's way and he caught it easily by the handle. "A thing or two you should consider doing instead of skipping classes," he sliced open his chicken breast with the same knife.

Thorfinn flipped the bird. "I don't need the input of someone who scams for a living."

For some reason, Askeladd didn't take that too lightly as he usually did. "And I didn't ask to raise a brat who doesn't listen to anyone but himself."

Bjorn sighed heavily, "oh boy."

"I didn't ask for this shit." Thorfinn said. "This was your choice."

"It was."

"So why go through with it?!"

"Because I was _doing your_ family a favor you little shit—!" Askeladd exclaimed, "I'm tired of you being ungrateful for the things I do for you, the things _Bjorn_ and I do for you!"

"You haven't done a single thing for me old man!" Thorfinn argued. "News flash, my life's still been _shit_ since you agreed to take care of me!"

"We're really gonna do this when a guest is over?" Bjorn asked wearily.

"Shut up!" Thorfinn barked. "None of you actually give a shit about me."

"So whaddya expect me to do?" Askeladd asked, vexing, "sometimes I wonder how Thors even took care of you, but it's clearly not enough when you turned out like this."

"Since you can't _bring him back_ ," Thorfinn stood up, " _why don't you just take his place already_ and die?" He shouted. With that, he left the dinner table abruptly and ran upstairs.

He didn't turn back after he shut the door behind him.

Canute stared at Thorfinn's empty dinner table.

Askeladd pinched the bridge of his nose.

"You wanna keep that in the fridge for later?" He asked Bjorn. "He'd just come lookin' for it tomorrow anyway."

The way he said it was as if this routine was repeated a thousand times over.

"Either Thorkell or one of the others might just end up eating it." Bjorn told him. "Unless we try and hide it."

"Make sure they don't." Askeladd said. They're both finished with their food, but Canute was too worried about Thorfinn to eat anymore.

"Excuse me." He pushed his chair back. "Um. Thank you very much for the meal." He said quickly, and polite.

It should be none of his business. He could get his coat and go his merry way, tell Ragnar the dinner he had with Thorfinn was over…

But there was still an agreement between them. One they needed to uphold. It was never directly discussed but the notion was there, an obligation. Part of Canute had the kindness in him to go after him.

Instead of going out the door, Canute prompted toward going upstairs. He could feel the two older men's gaze on him as he did so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: angst in my salad??? it's more likely than you think.
> 
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> 
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	5. The story of how a boy becomes an apprentice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there's awkward tension after the dinner with Askeladd and Bjorn went awry, so Thorfinn strives to resolve it. Gudrid and Hild inform him of a new job opportunity, unfortunately, it meshes with tutoring sessions with Canute.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woooo this chapter's longer than most cause i got kinda carried away lol

Thorfinn slammed the door shut behind him. _Dickhead._ If it weren't for the fact that his mother and sister were across the country he'd pack his shit and come running back.

But he didn't think they'd need his deadweight. Especially not since Ylva went off to college. He sat down on his bed and flopped back against it.

 _What was he doing with his life_?

He's just about _barely_ getting by in school, let alone figuring out what the Hell he wanted to do with his future.

Did he even have a future?

He wasn't even sure he was going to live past eighteen with just how badly he sucked at life in general. It's his final year and the crisis of a proper _future_ was getting to him that he's going to disappoint everyone who loved him— which surprisingly scared the Hell out of Thorfinn.

Some _con artist_ fuck who landed a job at corporate can't tell him shit about what his dad wanted for him. Anything but that.

The anniversary of his death was stalking close by and the dread washed over him that it's another year of his life he's done nothing noteworthy.

Someone knocked on the door.

 _"Get out._ " Thorfinn snarled. He didn't care who it was, his sour mood couldn't be fixed with simple pep talk from Bjorn or Askeladd telling him his food's in this fridge.

The door opened anyway.

Thorfinn shot up, grabbing the nearest pillow and he was about to chuck it. "— _I said don't come in_ —!" He stopped when he met startled blue eyes and sighed loudly.

Thorfinn forgot he invited little miss princess over. "The fuck do you want?" He asked, still cautious, but he wasn't going to throw a pillow at his face when he's not Askeladd.

"I…" Canute stayed put at the doorway. "Wanted to see if you were. Well. What happened. Back there."

"Jesus do you talk any slower?"

Canute, alarmed, turned bitter quickly. " _Are you alright_ is what I'm asking!" He exclaimed, "Mr. Castus and Bjorn are clearing up the table and I thought I should go and _check up_ on you."

"Yeah well, I feel like shit if you're wondering." Thorfinn smirked grimly, "now get out before I ruin your mood too. Why're you still here anyway?"

He expected the other to leave. The dinner's technically _over_ — he had homework to do and sad playlists to listen to so he can wallow in despair.

Maybe he should paint his nails over again and get rid of this chipped black polish. Ugly as fuck when he bit it and it got like this.

Thorfinn dropped back against the mattress, head hitting his pillow. He heard the door creaking, and it shut quietly.

But he felt uneasy.

The faintest dip of the mattress had Thorfinn springing up and pinning them down, a second close to taking his spare knife he hid under his bed for when Askeladd liked to hit him with surprise attacks in the morning.

Canute's breath hitched. Thorfinn caught a whiff of jasmine. He saw Canute swallow visibly.

"What do you think you're doing princess?" Thorfinn asked slowly, his gaze pinned on Canute. "What? You think I'm just as shitty and fucked up as them because we're not as loving as you and your daddy—"

"I've also lost my mother." Canute confessed. He didn't shift under Thorfinn's strong grip on his shoulders. “And I’ve barely ever gotten to know her.”

Thorfinn’s grip loosened, lifting his head slightly.

“None of the other women my father _married_ even counts. We’ve had to move so much that I expected us to be on our own by the time we settled on another place.”

Thorfinn slowly extracted himself from Canute. His emotions were all over the place, and he knew what was going to come out of his mouth was utter bullshit, all things considered.

“At least your father ain’t dead.” Thorfinn huffed.

Canute sat up. Thorfinn saw the fire brimming in his teal eyes. The pillow Thorfinn was about to use to throw at the door was thrown right into his face, _hard_.

“Good night, Thorfinn.” Canute stood up. “And I am truly sorry, for your loss,” the next words hit Thorfinn like the sharp end of a dagger, “and for Mr. Castus and Bjorn.” he whispered, storming out of the bedroom.

Thorifnn watched the door slam shut.

The pillow thrown at his face landed right in his lap. He scowled to himself, recoiling at what just occurred.

He should’ve just kept his mouth shut. _Damn it._

__

“Way to go, dumbass.”

The sweat and musk that a hundred kids could radiate from a single school gym was abysmal, and yet here they were. Seven thirty in the morning, throwing basketballs into a hoop in breakout groups.

Hild made a perfect shot, caught the ball in her hands and threw it at Thorfinn’s chest. Well, his face, if it weren’t for his stunt in height. “You managed to make the prince like you less.”

“Listen! I didn’t mean to!” Thorfinn dribbled the ball and attempted to make a shot, but it hit the corners. “Fuck.” he hissed, chasing after it, but Gudrid insisted she had it.

“Pass it to me!”

“You have to steal the ball from him in order to get it.” Hild reminded her. “He’s short so it’s easy.”

“Fuck off.” Thorfinn growled.

“Ooh, here.” Gudrid skipped over to him. Thorfinn wasn’t going to attempt curving her. He just threw the ball at her and she screamed, running away from it.

“Every single time.” Hild grabbed the ball and dribbled it, “Gudrid. Look at me.”

“Y-Yeah?” She squeaked, “Please don’t throw it too hard.”

“I won’t. I promise.”

“Pass the ball already!” Someone else shouted impatiently. Hild flipped them off. She approached Gudrid closely and passed her the ball as gently as she could.

“Thanks!” Gudrid smiled, gleeful. Thorfinn saw the faint red dusting Hild’s cheeks and he felt like he wanted to gag.

“Make the shot already.” Hild said. “Don’t worry, I’ll guard you so someone doesn’t fucking steal it.” It sounded like the others were too scared to anyway. Gudrid had the experience of a stale piece of bread in basketball but she did her best to dribble and make it to the hoop while Hild guarded her from anyone who tried to steal the ball from her. She made the shot, and she cheered.

“Yes!” She grabbed Hild’s hands, “I got it!”

The way Hild might faint by Gudrid’s enthusiasm was almost embarrassing to watch. He saw that Canute was sitting on the bleachers, drinking a bottle of water and watching the other kids play.

“I wonder if the whole health condition thing is legit.” Hild said, “y’know, the reason why he can’t really play in gym?”

“It’s like a waste of a period, then.” Thorfinn muttered. “Why come here if you’re not gonna suffer like the rest of us? Might as well do what I do most the time and skip.”

“It’s called privilege, Thorfinn. Pretty privilege.”

“If I sat out for even two seconds Mrs. Hacon would threaten to give me an F.” Gudrid’s breathless compared to Hild and Thorfinn. “My aunt would kill me if she found out I failed gym again for the second time.”

“I hate this shit.” Thorfinn grumbled. No wonder why most people skipped out on having gym this early to begin with. No one had the mental capacity to wake themselves up at half past seven every Thursday unless they were insane. “How do I. Make things, uh. Not, bad?”

“What happened between you and Canute?” Gudrid asked. Having to multitask talking and playing sports was a hassle. He told Hild during warmups what happened, and Gudrid was still changing in the locker room.

“Canute told him about family issues and Thorfinn decided to be a dick about it.”

“Don’t put it like that!”

Hild smiled sweetly at him. She caught the ball when someone else passed it to her and quickly swerved through the forming crowd that wanted to snag the ball away so she could shoot. Each time, she made flawless shots, while most would miss.

“I told her she should try out for the basketball team.” Gudrid said, “she’s really good. Right?”

Thorfinn shrugged. “I guess.”

“She wants to do archery. Her dad owns this cool range and stuff but he won’t let her take lessons unless she gets into the college he wants her to go to.”

Thorfinn could admit, he can sympathize with that. Just a tad bit. “It sucks when parents have a chokehold on your goals and dreams.”

“He’s actually pretty accepting with her playing basketball though. But it’s up to her.” Gudrid said, “so what did… you tell Canute? I noticed you two have been, _way_ off for the past week.”

Everything’s been off.

“Uh. Just. I made him come over for dinner and stuff. Askeladd’s being a dick as usual. I told him to eat shit and he had to see the whole thing. Which is pathetic, I know. He comes in telling me all this shit about how he didn’t even know his mom.” He won’t go into details, because it’s not wholly his business to tell. “I was angry and I basically brushed it off as him being lucky he has two loving parents. I don’t exactly live with my _real_ mom and my older sister would basically be like a close second guardian.”

“Was Askeladd like, divorced?”

“I don’t even fucking know, but God, not to my mom either.” Thorfinn said, “but they have relations, which is why he’s taking care of me.”

“He was trying to make you feel better.” Gudrid said.

“What could he possibly do to not make me feel worse? He knows how we live now pretty much!”

“Not everyone’s perfect.” Gudrid emphasized, “Go apologize to him. He’s your boyfriend.”

“We’re not—”

“Gudrid!” Hild held up the ball, shoving another guy away, “I’m gonna pass this to you, okay?”

Their conversation ended abruptly, Thorfinn grumbled to himself.

“Okay!”

Before Hild could throw it though, some other girl had knocked the ball out her hands. Thorfinn watched the ball go flying toward the bleachers.

 _Right_ where Canute was sitting.

_Oh no._

Thorfinn sprinted so fast that no one witnessed anything other than a quick flash. Canute’s eyes widened and he quickly ducked, needing to shield himself. Thorfinn stepped in front of him and grabbed the ball, right in the nick of time.

“Oops! Sorry!” They apologized.

“Nice one.” Hild glared.

Thorfinn threw the ball right at Gudrid. He made sure no one else was in range to catch it but her.

“You’re better off just skipping.” Thorfinn said, turning his head slightly, but not facing Canute entirely. “Or at least sit near the door so you don’t get hit.”

“Skipping might be your priority,” Canute grabbed his things and stood up, “ _but it isn’t mine.”_ he glared, walking away.

“Are you alright?!”

“I’m fine.” Canute answered with a slight wave, “I’m moving, so you don’t have to worry about hitting me.”

So he’s not going to thank him at all for that, huh? Thorfinn scoffed.

Thorfinn noticed Canute hadn’t really been sitting with his friends anymore. Not even Edmund.

If anything, whenever Thorfinn happened to catch sight of them in the halls it just looked like they were in a heated debate about something.

It’s strange.

Gudrid kept bugging him to apologize. They weren’t even up to the usual banter in Algebra anymore. Thorfinn still helped him, given he wanted to uphold his end of the bargain. But Canute would just thank him dryly and leave the moment class was over.

Dr. Davis said to mull over the things he said and think about what he would say to himself if he were in Canute’s shoes. Words don’t go as smoothly with your next door neighbor than it would with a best friend you’ve known for like, ten years. Unfortunately, Thorfinn didn’t have a single friend long enough to know what that was like.

He hadn’t been speaking to Askeladd, either. He quietly slipped into the home while their relatives and friends were over. Thorkell still loudly greeted him and Bjorn told him there’s food waiting for him in the kitchen. Nothing from Askeladd. Thorfinn liked it that way. He’d just throw his bag across the room, shower, eat, do homework, and lock himself in the room to play Call of Duty for the rest of the night.

He’s not going to Aesgir’s bar either if it meant having to see his fucking face. Ylva’s texting him about what she and Helga are planning to do for their father’s anniversary, nothing big, just making his favorite dish and writing something thoughtful about him. They usually asked if Thorfinn wanted to contribute anything while they’re away from each other, just for the sake of being more _involved_ with their traditional familial activities.

He felt bad he couldn’t think of anything much other than sulking about it. If it weren’t for money-related issues Ylva would’ve dragged his ass down south with him kicking and screaming.

Eventually, he apologized. He found Canute in the library, dropping his bag next to him while he poured through a textbook and sat on the table. Ignoring the glare coming from the librarian into his soul.

“I was being an ass.” He said. “Sorry. About that night.”

“Wouldn’t you like to know the significance of owning up to your actions, Thorfinn Karlsefni?”

Thorfinn’s lips jutted into a pout, “well that’s why I’m apologizing, isn’t it?”

Canute rolled his eyes. “What do you want, Thorfinn?”

“I just. Didn’t.” Thorfinn wished this went easier like how it did in his head. “No one outside of my family’s seen how I _live_ and shit like how you do. And you’re little miss perfect. But it didn’t give me a right to say what I said.”

“Don’t fret about it.” Canute replied, tuckered, “because everyone’s a personal threat to you and your miniscule ego you have to make everyone feel horrible for showing an ounce of sympathy. I’m quite used to your character.”

“You’re nice.”

Canute stared up at him.

Thorfinn flushed, scratching his head. “I mean. You. You don’t judge. I just. Felt. Like you were. But you were. You were _nice_ about it.”

Canute sighed, his gaze averting to other working students, and some quietly chatting among themselves. “My uncle, Ragnar, would like for you to come over next week Monday.”

Thorfinn blinked, “huh?”

“Tutoring arrangements.”

“ _T-That’s still a thing_?”

“Shh!”

Thorfinn ducked his head in slight embarrassment. He heard a quiet snort coming from Canute.

“It was never cancelled. I’m sure you’d be able to make it. That is, once you get over your disingenuous misanthropy.” Canute closed the textbook shut, and put it away. “I have student government matters to attend to.” He slung his bag over his shoulder, gracefully walking away.

“W-What— hey—” Canute was already out the door. _Why that little._

“Excuse me, sir.” The librarian finally decided to speak up after noticing he’s been improperly seated on the table for a good ten minutes, “but you must sit in a _seat_ or I’m afraid I might have to ask you to leave.”

Thorfinn clicked his tongue, grabbing his shit and leaving the library.

If anything, Askeladd’s being even more enthusiastic now that him and Thorfinn weren’t on proper speaking terms.

Bjorn’s seen this happen a billion times, so he could care less about their dispute. He mostly just ignored it as Thorfinn’s been opting to take the bus in the mornings instead and he offered to drop him home from the gym and therapy if he wanted. But that meant seeing Askeladd one way or the other because those two were like Clyde _and_ Clyde, fucking inseparable.

Helga sent him a letter telling him about what’s been happening recently, and she’s also reminding him about the anniversary. Thorfinn didn’t shred these letters, he kept them somewhere in his drawer. He didn’t have the heart to respond back, but sometimes he wanted to tell her that he missed her. He just didn’t know how. They don’t have the money to see each other much in means of the holidays, and the last time was two years ago, where Ylva single-handedly beat Bjorn in an arm-wrestling contest and Askeladd in a drinking contest. Where Askeladd proceeded to vomit and then pass out on the coffee table.

She said that if their mother was struggling so much it wouldn’t hurt to tell her a damn thing or two as her son. He’s just guilty he chose leaving with his dad instead of thinking about coming back home.

“I need to find a job.”

They’re discussing this over milkshakes, burgers, and fries.

“You’re better off without one.” Hild said.

“How about you go fuck yourself?”

“I can smash your head against this window first, Karlsefni.”

“Oh.” Gudrid tapped her chin, “what about Ketil’s Repairs?”

Thorfinn stopped chowing down his burger, “where?” he asked.

“Einar and Snake’s place?”

“What, what hold on.” Thorfinn sat up, raising a leg up on the cushion of the chair because he was the only one sitting on his side. “What place are you guys talking about?”

“It’s a bike shop.” Gudrid replied, “They actually really need a volunteer. Last guy walked out because he had a ton of personal issues, and they don’t mind inexperienced trainees.”

“Where is this place?” Thorfinn asked, “please, I need to find a job as soon as possible to save up for a bike anyway because Askeladd won’t get one for me.”

“I don’t think working there’s gonna get your dumbass a free bike.” Hild snorted, “it doesn’t work like that.”

“They’re pretty desperate.” Gudrid defended.

“How do you guys know this? You’re not bullshittin’ me, right?”

“Hild went over there one time when her car broke down and they offered to fix it up for free. It’s someone that my aunt knew that did repairs and stuff, so they said it was on the house out of courtesy, they also knew Hild’s dad. Small world, right?” Gudrid explained, “anyway we really wanted to pay them back but they said no and since then we’ve kinda just, hung out with them. They both went to trade school and they’re full-time mechanics, so don’t worry, they’re legit.”

“Their boss is a bag of shit.” Hild added, “he’s also exactly why the last guy left. His dad doesn’t do much because he’s old and sick, so it’s just him, and he needs more employees so they don’t run themselves out of business for extra hands.”

“So far they have no luck.” Gudrid said, “so you should try stopping by and asking.”

“I. I don’t have a car.” Thorfinn said, at least, not yet. “How far is it?”

“...Hmm, you know that bakery across the street? From the uh… the hardware store, and the CVS?”

Thorfinn perked up, “what’s the name of the bakery?”

“Cordelia’s Baked Goods.”

“That’s one of my cousins.” Thorfinn said, “I know where that place is.” They come over there all the time for special occasions because they trusted Cordelia more than any other baker, the last guy tried to poison their cake for Liv and Astrid’s baby shower. Fortunately only one person was affected by it when they were forced to take the first bite as a taste test. Cyanide’s a baker’s best friend, apparently.

He was okay, just barely.

Thorfinn could guess what the fuck Askeladd did to piss off a baker of all people. So they settled with Cordelia when she was able to finally get her shop up and running and surprisingly had done well the past three years, Thorfinn’s just sad for her that their family’s a bunch of fucking leeches. As long as they were the reason the sales had been racking up ten times more than it was first opening.

Gudrid and Hild looked at each other.

The mechanics at Ketil’s repairs were… just what Hild and Gudrid described. Two… admittedly attractive mechanics, one a brunet, another with dark, black hair. Both bearded men, sturdy, quite generous.

Ketil’s Repairs had been running for a couple years. Snake’s been working there longer than Einar had, because Einar had a bit of a rough bump in the road with finishing requirements for his auto-mechanic license. So he had to retake the course, then he succeeded the second time without fail.

Their boss, Ketil, was a douche. Thorfinn could already tell by looking at the bastard’s face. Luckily there was a bus that took him there after school and it just happened to be right before closing time.

“Uh.” Thorfinn realized that he had no business coming here if he didn’t drive a car, that was broken, either.

Einar seemed to understand, though. “Holy shit Snake, what did I tell you?!”

“Huh?” Snake’s reading a magazine, a cigarette in his mouth as he leaned back in an old chair. The place had a fan because presumably they didn’t have proper air conditioning, the place looked outdated, anyway.

Einar picked up a wrench, not hesitating to throw it at Snake. He caught it with ease. “Get out the damn chair! We got a newbie!”

“A what?” Thorfinn questioned, baffled.

“Did you read our advertisement online?”

“No one reads online advertisements.” Snake parroted back, leaving the chair and rolling his shoulders. The two men towered over Thorfinn by a couple inches.

“I just. Uh.” Thorfinn panicked a little. “Well I was told about this place.”

“By who?” Snake asked.

“Do you know anyone named Hild, or Gudrid?”

The two men’s serious facial expressions softened.

“Ah!” Einar gasped, “Those two!”

“We’ve been telling them to ask around if there’s a young stud that can help us out and shit. But they never got around to it.” Snake said, “so our boss has been hasslin’ us to get the word out there we need an apprentice, paid, at that.”

Thorfinn wasn’t going to miss out on this chance. “That’s why I’m here.”

“You wanna work as our apprentice?” Snake asked. “Well would you look at that? No advertisin’ did shit but word of mouth did.”

“It doesn’t matter anyway!” Einar argued, “we got someone right here! So Ketil’s not gonna let us go.”

“He won’t when we make him money anyway. Okay.” Snake cocked his head toward the office. “Let’s make this shit quick, kid, I’m cravin’ like, a BLT right now and we were just about ready to start clockin’ out early.”

“O-Okay.” Thorfinn followed them.

“We wouldn’t have actually because he’s supposed to help me.” Einar muttered. “But I’m always doing the closing myself.”

“You’re strong and tough.” Snake clapped his shoulder, “I’d prefer you do it anyway while I get my relax time.” he winked at Einar, and the other man glared, a blush dusting his cheeks. Thorfinn eyed the two of them curiously.

The interview was quite short.

Ketil wasn’t there for the most part. He’s there when it’s important, and said important times were as rare as they come. Most likely because his father was in critical care and left the business to him before it fell in shambles, and it turned him into more of an asshole. Thorfinn wasn’t exactly here to hear the history of this shitty mechanic shop but he was interested anyway while Snake explained it.

“You the same age as Gudrid and Hild, yeah?” Einar asked.

“Yeah.”

“Do you like bikes?”

“I… I do.”

Snake whistled. “And we were just about to give up. Are you looking to be a full-time mechanic after graduation?”

“Um.” Thorfinn scratched his cheek, “I don’t. Well. I haven’t really decided what I wanted to do for college.” He’s told his college counselor the same thing and she kept pressing him on looking into his possible interests for when the time came around, going to college fairs and all that shit. He liked history, but that was a mere hobby. He didn’t see himself doing that for the long-term. But _this_ …

“Trade school?” Einar asked. “Y’know if people aren’t feelin’ universities and shit and you’re lookin’ for somethin’ licensed, like a technician, a plumber, construction, air traffic, could be in any department. Normally you’d come here if you have an interest in an apprenticeship at your age.”

Thorfinn just wanted extra cash, if he’s thinking hard about it. “How does it work?”

“We train you.” Snake said. “Once you graduate we can refer you to gettin’ licensed in case you’re lookin’ for somethin’ serious. You’re still a kid, so you gotta figure all that shit out. Like, we get it. Also, we just need somebody we can train so that our boss don’t cut our dicks off, ya feel me?”

Thorfinn nodded slowly.

“It ain’t gonna be an easy job.” Snake said, “unlike your local janitor’s job, respect to them, this is a repair shop. So you gotta know the ropes.”

“Don’t scare him into leaving now.” Einar laughed, “we’re gonna be the ones to teach you anyway! What’s your name?”

“Thorfinn.”

“You have any prior job experience?”

“...Hot Topic.”

Snake and Einar exchanged slightly doubtful glances. “Well you look like you could use a job that’s less pussy than that.” Snake said, puffing out more smoke from his cigarette. “You go to school still?"

“Y-Yeah.” Thorfinn sat up, “Listen I can learn. I like bikes. A lot. I want one. Well that’s not why I’m here,” it was, entirely, “I just. I think I could handle it. Preferably something I can do after school for as long as this place is open, I don’t care how late it is. I really need a fucking job and I can come in whenever I'm done with school.”

“Hmm.” Einar stroked his chin, “whaddya say, Snake? Seems dedicated.”

Snake leaned back in his chair. “Could be worse.”

Einar plucked the cigarette out of Snake’s mouth and tossed it in the tiny trash bin at the corner of the office. Snake yelped, sitting up in his chair.

“What the Hell, Einar—?!”

“You got a resume on you?” Einar asked.

“You’re supposed to bring that?” Thorfinn asked. He got hired at the mall for the same reason, a last-minute attempt at grabbing an employee to cover weekend day shifts early in the morning and Thorfinn wasn’t cut out for that shit, so he barely lasted two weeks.

“Don’t.” Snake said. “It’s good you bring your documentation for regulation sake, and so that he doesn’t think we’re taking in, I dunno, a criminal, I mean… you don’t have a criminal record on you, do you?”

“No.” Thorfinn said, “but my family does. That sounds bad, doesn’t it?”

Snake and Einar laughed.

“You’re supposed to lie about that shit.” Snake said, “but we honestly don’t give a shit. It’s more lenient with felons here. Education and all that don’t really matter. As long as you're willin' to work your ass off and if you can _do it_ is much more important."

“What are the uh... documentation requirements.” Thorfinn asked. Admittedly he let Bjorn help him with that part.

“Same as any other gig. Straight-forward. Uh. ID. Permit. Whatever the fuck. Anything that tells us that you’re not a serial killer fakin’ your identity so we can hire you.” Snake answered.

Einar smacked Thorfinn on the shoulder, “who’s to say we can’t hire ‘im now?”

“We need to _pretend_ we’re considerin’.” Snake hissed.

"You're hired." Einar ignored him. "Einar." he stuck his hand out to Thorfinn, cocking his head Snake's direction. "This asshole you saw reading a magazine earlier is Roald but we all call 'im Snake 'round here, we're the only working employees here."

Thorfinn took his hand. "Uh. Hi." He nodded.

"Nice to meet you, kid."

Snake sighed loudly. "We still need to go over a few things so we'd have to call you _back_ before anything's official."

“Uh. Thank you.” Thorfinn ducked his head. “When can I… when can I come back?”

Fortunately, Thorfinn got the job.

Unfortunately, his shifts meant that the Monday he was supposed to meet Canute for a study date he’d spend it through vigorous hours of training. Thorfinn didn’t have any experience in mechanics whatsoever, and that was already a disadvantage on his end. Einar said that normally they’d look for people who have completed the requirements of auto-mechanics and was seeking an apprenticeship before proper qualification.

But Ketil didn’t give a shit about who it was, he just needed someone to start working in the shop by the end of the week or he’s letting them go. So they had to shove several hours of apprenticeship training into Thorfinn’s schedule.

It turned out that Snake’s more of the one who gave the run-down of how things worked around the shop and Einar was the teacher.

They were meant to be his mentors, however, he more saw them as laid back, older friends who he could come to for advice and not his scary fellow co-workers. But he still tried his best to respect them as his superiors, as if he were rude, Snake would give him a piece of his mind. He couldn’t be rude to Ketil either as much as he was a dick who’d just come in to ask them to run errands when they were in the middle of working, and wouldn’t take no for an answer.

Thorfinn’s been so caught up in training that he realized he was late for Canute’s study session, by half an hour. Canute started sending him texts and calling him asking where he was. So he practically begged them to let him close early and clock out.

 **Princess [8:30 P.M]:** Thorfinn Karlsefni.

 **Princess [8:30 P.M]:** You better come over here THIS INSTANT.

 **Princess [8:30 P.M]:** I will be extremely upset if you CANCEL this. Ragnar is asking me about you and when you are coming.

 **Princess [8:30 P.M]:** THORFINN.

"No texting." Einar chided.

"Sorry, uh. I've really gotta get going for something." Thorfinn explained, "something important I forgot I had today."

“Gotta hot date, eh?” Einar asked.

“No.” Thorfinn flushed deeply, “but. Uh. Just something important. Personal.” A real convincing reply when he just repeated himself.

"You know this apprenticeship requires all your focus and dedication."

"I know. I should've told you ahead of time if I was more... responsible."

“Sure, sure.” Einar said, “but it’s gonna cost you. Any day you take off whether it be early or a sick day it’s gonna add to your hours.”

Thorfinn would pay that price so Canute didn’t snitch on him again.

Besides, he’s a little comfortable working there. It took some progression, the hours were torture and he had to push sessions with Dr. Davis for his days he had off, and he’d take jogs to make up for skipping the gym.

Einar offered to give him a ride.

Thorfinn politely declined, twice, and then he ended up in his car driving to Canute’s house. Embarrassingly admitting that it _kind of like a date_ but it’s also not.

Thorfinn called Canute on the phone to shut him up, "alright alright I'm coming already! Don't get your panties in a twist!"

_"Well you're not being fast enough."_

"Don't rush me, God damn it."

 _"I will be waiting."_ Canute hung up the call.

"Wait! Hey!" Thorfinn clicked his tongue. He waited for Einar to leave the shop with his car keys, letting Snake know that Thorfinn would be stepping out a little bit early tonight and taking him to Canute's house.

The drive was another thirty minutes. Traffic decided to say hello on their way there.

“It’s like that awkward _is but not_ phase, eh?” Einar questioned, “buddy I definitely get where you’re going with this.”

“Do you?” Thorfinn asked.

“Of course!” Einar nudged him, “don’t get your hopes up, though. You never know when things can switch up.”

Thorfinn didn’t know how to explain that they’re doing this so their families can shake hands and none of it was meant to be genuine with any emotional attachment related to it.

“Sure.”

“Have fun.”

Thorfinn left the car.

“You gotta come in tomorrow at five o’clock, on the dot.” Einar reminded him, “or else Snake’s gonna tear you a new one.”

“Yeah…”

The person who Canute mentioned, Ragnar, was there to welcome him after a housekeeper opened the door. Her name was Karrianna, a small timid woman who looked quite young.

“Canute!” Ragnar called him down, “his father is out, currently. He usually doesn’t arrive until early morning.”

“Yeah.” Thorfinn had his bag slung over his shoulder, still in the jumpsuit he was required to wear. It belonged to the guy who walked out on the job and quit, unzipped, and he looked underdressed, but he was too exhausted to care right now.

Canute descended the stairs, dressed in a knitted, v-neck white sweater, and black leggings, house slippers on his feet. His glasses on, and his hair done in a side braid. He was cradling a tiny, fluffy white kitten in his arms, letting it down so she can scurry up to Thorfinn.

Thorfinn looked down at the cat, stepping back. It stared right back up at him, circling his shoes.

“Took you long enough.” He told Thorfinn. “Be polite to strangers, Astra.”

Astra stopped scurrying around Thorfinn and went back to Canute, sitting right behind him.

“She’s like that with everyone.” Ragnar chuckled.

“Would you both like a snack?” Karrianna asked.

“Bring it upstairs, would you, thank you. Karrianna.” Canute grabbed Thorfinn’s hand. “We’ll be going upstairs now, Ragnar.”

“O-Oh. You sure you wouldn’t like Thorfinn to settle in?” Ragnar asked.

“It’s just to study. Nothing too serious.”

Astra followed Karrianna into the kitchen, it’s probably mealtime for her as well.

“Hey!” Thorfinn didn’t appreciate being dragged up the stairs, but Canute did anyway. His grand house was nothing short of Thorfinn’s expectation upon walking in, but he’s blown away by the spacious interior, the polished floors, the fancy hanging lights, paintings hung up neatly on the walls. Not a single broken antique out of place, someone’s sock lying on the ground. A bone from a piece of chicken someone failed to throw in the garbage can, flies here and there from rotten food. They had butlers, housekeepers, and a fucking roomba.

Thorfinn used his vacuum to hit Askeladd with so it barely worked anymore.

His astounding bedroom had two doors Canute pushed open, much like that of a price. A fur-covered duvet, a couch seat of the finest red cushions at the window sill, sleek, marbled floors. A mirror where he sat to primp himself, a desk where he was able to do his work.

“We’ll be studying on my bed.” Canute announced. He moved across the floor gracefully, and Thorfinn simply threw his bag on the mattress.

“Make this fucking quick, princess.” Thorfinn said, “I had a long day.” he sat on the bed beside him.

“I would’ve.” Canute said, “however, you decided to show up thirty minutes after your designated time.”

“It’s just thirty fucking minutes.” Thorfinn frowned. “I had work.”

“Work?”

“If you didn’t realize,” Thorfinn gestured to his work uniform, “I got a damn job. I’ve spent the past week workin’ my ass off and my schedule wasn’t gonna mesh.”

“Don’t you think it would’ve been possible to tell me beforehand?”

“I… forgot.” Thorfinn mumbled.

“I suppose it wouldn’t be too much trouble to work your way around it. We _do_ have a deal.” _Cunt._

Thorfinn scoffed. “So where do we start with this shit?” He unzipped his jumpsuit, leaving a plain black shirt underneath. He didn’t have a change of clothes because he forgot about the study session and was fully intending on going straight home after work was over.

Karrianna came upstairs to offer them snacks, and Thorfinn decided to pretend this place was like his own. Asking if she had any apple juice to give him and chips, rather than plain crackers. Canute looked at him, aghast, and Thorfinn ignored him.

She did as he requested, often Ragnar coming in to check on them while Canute stated what they’d be working on, starting from the topics he had the most struggle with up to the least.

Thorfinn calmed down a little now that he was rested, and made an attempt to teach Canute to the best of his abilities. Once again, he was new at this. But he was apparently expected to do what he usually did during classwork time, except, he’d have more time to break down the problems step by step and do practice questions. Often Canute would struggle and Thorfinn had to harshly berate him for it, make him try again, again, and again, (admittedly taking a little satisfaction in how long it’d take him to break) and feign nonchalance when he got an answer right.

“If you don’t wanna retake this class, don’t pretend you know what you’re doing to prove a point.”

“S-Sometimes it’s good to make confirmations for yourself!” Canute argued.

“The tutor is the one who’s right.”

“That doesn’t mean you’re incapable of making mistakes.”

“Name one mistake I’ve made.”

“You’re staying an extra _hour_ than intended, I hope you’re aware of that, Thorfinn Karlsefni.”

“Past your bedtime, probably?” Thorfinn smirked.

“My bedtime isn’t until ten-thirty, mind you.”

He cackled, “you’re shittin’ me.”

“I’m not!”

“ _Ten-thirty?_ ”

“When is yours?”

“I don’t have one, princess. I never will.”

“That’s preposterous.”

“Your daddy’s out working. And you still follow house rules.” Thorfinn snorted. “That’s pretty fucking cute.”

“Ragnar’s the one who enforces them.” Canute said, bashful.

“It’s probably best if I don’t keep you up too long.”

Canute glared. It’s easy to get him to blush like that. “What really made you agree to this anyway?”

“What?”

“Us… courting each other.”

“What, you mean like dating?”

“Yes.”

Thorfinn sighed. “If I’m being honest, I could care less about what the fuck your dad wants or what Askeladd wants. I wanted a bike out of this.” He opened the bag of salt potato chips and shoved a handful into his mouth, some crumbs spilled onto their worksheets, and he merely swiped them off.

“Karrianna has to clean that.”

“Then she can clean it.”

Canute shook his head, shifting his seated position so that his knees could rest. “A bike.” he repeated. “You’re courting me for a bike?”

“I was. Then I decided that I’m not gonna let Askeladd use me as a pawn for his bullshit, so I’m gonna get a job and make enough money to buy one myself.”

“That’s ludicrous. A car isn’t cheap unless it’s bought used.”

“Then I can get the cheapest one I could get my hands on. I can drive legally, I just don’t have a whip.”

“It could take ages.”

“I already said what I said.” Thorfinn answered, nettled. “If he can’t buy it, I’ll buy it myself.”

“That’s… your obligatory motive.”

“Do you have a much better one?”

Canute looked down, “not necessarily.” he replied, quieter. “My father decides what he wants for me, and I go along with it. And he thinks that your father has potential.”

Thorfinn laughed. “Oh, he’s good at that.”

“At what?”

“Fooling the shit out of people.”

“As I’d expect.” Canute said. “While I also find it undoubtable.”

“There’s surely more than just wanting to do what he says.”

“He said he’d eventually fund going to culinary school for me.”

“Cooking.”

“You sound very judgemental.”

Thorfinn snickered, “yeah, just be a good little son and you’re able to get what you want so easily. Gimme a break.”

“It’s… not as simple as you think.” Canute said. “Listen I don’t expect you to fulfil your obligations more than a certain degree, so we’re only compromising to get something we both want.”

“And we don’t question it.” Thorfinn said. He didn’t think he’d land a job so that’s why he agreed to Askeladd’s deal, but he did, but he isn’t stupid. He knew that it’d take a lot more in his savings for him to invest in a new motorcycle just like that. He’s still in school and only fucking worked part-time. He’d calculate he’d take until his first or second year of college he’d be near the designated price he wanted.

“Fair enough.” Canute answered, “and thank you.”

“For what?”

“What happened during gym.” Canute said, “um. You didn’t have to.”

“Whatever.” Thorfinn muttered.

“Our qualms we have about each other are understandable and for everyone else’s sake we just need to work through them.”

“We ain’t getting fucking married or anything, so it’s not like we gotta like each other outside of this.” Thorfinn explained, “I help you study. You make Askeladd happy. Your dad doesn’t flip his shit. Everyone’s happy. Great.”

Canute seemed reluctant about that, “Since you could handle things better considerably simplex.”

“Go fuck yourself, princess.”

Thorfinn had to pay the penalty of staying past their dinner time and helping Canute study because he came late, and because Canute had a hard time on the last topic, Thorfinn didn’t have the mental capacity to stay too long to help him with that when he had to get home himself and do his own schoolwork.

“I thought we agreed we can’t move on until I’ve officially understood everything!”

“And I’ve gotta get my ass home. The sweet bread was good, by the way.”

“Thorfinn!”

“We can continue another time.”

“And when will another time be?” Canute followed him outside, Thorfinn decided he’d call Bjorn to give him a ride back. Fuck, it really sucked not having a motorcycle right now.

“Maybe… next week.”

“Next week?!” Canute gawked, “absolutely not!”

“If not next week then you’re gonna have to find another tutor. I got a strict work schedule.”

“What happened to upholding our bargains?”

“I’m proposing another date!” Thorfinn vexed, “what the Hell do you want me to do? Quit?! I just got this damn job!”

“It has to be after school five days a week.” Canute said, “weekends are an exception unless I state otherwise.”

“I ain’t doing that, princess.”

“Then my father would hate to know that you’re stirring up trouble in our relationship.”

Thorfinn laughed, “you think you can threaten me with this shit now?!” he barked.

“Thorfinn!” Ragnar stepped outside, “Are you going now?”

“Yeah I am.” Thorfinn responded.

“I’m just seeing him out.” Canute told him.

“I see, I see! It’s cold out. Don’t stay out too long. Canute must rest immediately. It’s very late!”

“Ragnar—” Thorfinn snorted, and Canute lightly swatted him, “— _I will be in in a moment_ , please do not worry!”

“Karrianna’s making preparations. Come inside soon.” Ragnar left the doors closed halfway.

“I’m not being your tutor for five days awake. I ain’t juggling two jobs at once.” Thorfinn said, “I don’t care if you need me to come like once a week to make nice with Ragnar and your servants but I got shit I need to do too.”

“Last time I can recall, you agreed to be my _partner_.” Canute reasoned, “therefore, I have every right to establish rules of my own.”

“New rule, if I don’t fucking agree with it then I’m not doing it.”

“That’s invalid.”

“Bullshit.”

“Once a week won’t do when we have a test in two. You’d just have to pour more hours into our study sessions.”

Thorfinn huffed a laugh, “you planning on paying me?”

“That’s a generous demand.” The sarcasm was heavy in Canute’s tone.

“Canute!” Ragnar called again.

“I’m on my way!”

“Two times a week.”

“No.”

“Take it or leave it.”

“I cannot fail any of my classes if it would not please Ragnar.”

“I don’t just do this shit for the Hell of it either.”

Ragnar’s conehead popped out of the door again, “You must come inside this instant!”

Thorfinn had an idea. Just as Canute was about to say something, he tugged him close and leaned up, getting on his tiptoes temporarily so he could slot their lips together firmly. Canute gasped into his lips, close to pushing him off, but Thorfinn only pulled him tightly against him by the waist.

“Three times a week.” Thorfinn whispered in his ear, haughty, “take it or leave it.”

Canute backed away as if he’d been burned. “T-Thorfinn Karlsefni—!” he fumed, face as red as a tomato, “ _how dare you_ —”

“Later, _babe_.” Thorfinn walked away casually, waving. He left Canute there, gaping like a fish out of water. Ragnar rushed outside to bring him back indoors. “Have a good night.” he called back to Ragnar, and once he reached the end of the block he fought the urge to smirk to himself, calling Bjorn on the phone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: WOO einar and snake have made an appearance!! stay tuned for more shenanigans.
> 
> Follow me where I give updates on this fic, listen to my playlist, and feel free to ask me things on my CC! ❤️
> 
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	6. How to get dragged into a drug cartel scheme, by accident

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the strain put on Askeladd and Thorfinn's relationship prompts him to spend more time with Canute. Gudrid and Hild convince him to come to a halloween party. He supposes that nothing would go wrong on a night out, right?
> 
> Boy, were they all wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> god idk how this ended up so long KAKNJNAJKSNKDN

"Sure he's not standing you up?" Asgeir asked. Askeladd chuckled as he slid another hard drink his way.

"Bjorn would never." Askeladd answered. "He always comes runnin' to my rescue. Like my knight and shinin' armor."

"More like he's always coming to pull your ass out of whatever nonsense you got yourself into." Asgeir teased.

"That's a more blunt way to put it." Askeladd said, "been like what, over twenty years?"

"Your bail. Your cunning con schemes. Swindling the law enforcement. Jesus, it's like you're a criminal mastermind and the poor guy's your sidekick."

"If I can recall you've had to help Thorkell out a few times haven't 'cha? Also he had that failed marriage and all that drama with his ex-wife, her family and shit. And then Cordelia popped out of that. Oh boy."

Asgeir sighed. "Okay, okay, fair enough. That was... certainly a time."

"I can't believe he's teachin' kids how to throw footballs and shit." Askeladd said. "Well I don't think workin' in corporate like us folks is his kinda thing."

"He loves them." Asgeir smiled fondly, "it was his idea we'd adopt two of our own. I feel like they love him more than they love me."

"Huh." Askeladd drank his glass. "But they do love you, at least."

"Hm?"

"Liv and Astrid."

"Well I'm not home very often because I work night shifts." Asgeir explained. "Sometimes he offers to take over while I go home and take care of the kids. They never like any of their babysitters but we can't always ask one of you to watch them. I never ask him for a single thing. He always does everything for me."

"He'd make a good husband won't he?" Askeladd grinned. Asgeir almost dropped his glass he was wiping down.

"W-We haven't necessarily talked about that yet."

"C'mon! You two were high school sweethearts! Bjorn's shitty parents never liked me so you know we had that break going on up until midway through college!"

“Did you?” Asgeir asked, “I wonder why.”

“Because my devilish good looks, obviously.”

“You’re still such a bachelor, Askeladd.”

Askeladd stared down into his glass. “Everyone’s gotta assume growing older means settling down and tryin’ not to break your back.”

“That’s exactly what it is.” Asgeir cackled.

“Ugh, it’s no fun. Shoutin’ about mortgages and goin’ to your day jobs, night jobs, whatever, and you got kids screamin’ about every two fuckin’ seconds.”

“Might I remind you,” Asgeir leaned in, “you _do_ have a child of your own.”

Just as Askeladd was about to answer, someone else walked in. It’s one of those late work nights, meaning only deadbeat regulars showed up looking to down alcohol until they forget the pain of a single work day, these motherfuckers definitely worked overtime. He felt them. Right now, Sweyn’s keeping him on a placeholder and never actually owned up to any considerations of that promotion.

He hated his shitty office he had currently because it was a spare and too cramped, he’s looking to the new one he was promised. He’s not getting it. Shit’s looking slower than he thought and he didn’t want to rub the stupid old fuck’s shoulders too much or he’d catch on that he’s up to something. Besides, he coughed up a storm too much to want to stand within ten feet near him. Neither do any of his employees.

“Big bear!” Askeladd exclaimed upon Bjorn’s arrival, the other looked quite displeased to see him. “I was thinkin’ you stood me up!”

“I was about to.” Bjorn said, shuffling in the stool next to Askeladd. “You barely ask me to come join you.”

“Maybe I was… feelin’ a little lonely?”

“Like Hell you are.”

“C’mon! We’re colleagues, right? So we could at least spend some actual _downtime_ together.”

“I remember.” Asgeir nodded at Bjorn, already preparing his drink for him.

“Impressive. He only comes here like twice every other week.”

“I know which regulars I get no matter how scarce their schedules are.” Asgeir said, “helps me remember their go-tos depending on the hour.”

“I’m jealous.”

“Askeladd.” Bjorn looked at him, “you only ever ask me to come here _for_ a reason.”

“Yeah,” Askeladd shrugged, “to spend quality time with my _favorite_ colleague.”

“No.” Bjorn sighed, “You wanna talk about shit, is that it?”

“Straight to the point.” Askeladd snorted, “sugarcoat it a lil’ won’t cha?”

“We been doin’ this way too many times to sugarcoat shit.” He accepted the glass Asgeir handed to him, “thanks. Thorkell ain’t coverin’ for you tonight?”

“He’s ending a late meeting, and then he’s taking care of the kids.”

“It's harder when they’re young.” Askeladd chimed in, “somebody’s always gotta watch over them because they can’t do shit by themselves without screwin’ somethin’ up.”

“What do you think he’s doing right now?” Bjorn asked. Another customer caught Asgeir’s attention, so he wasn’t tuning into their more hushed conversation.

“Who?” Askeladd pretended that he needed Bjorn to elaborate.

“Do you even know what he does when he’s not at home?”

Askeladd snorted, “I mean he’s got a therapist, which I’m payin’ for, and a gym membership, which I’m also payin’ for. What else?”

“You tend to forget that he’s not a kid anymore.” Bjorn said. “Sorry, how should I rephrase this, he’s not just a lost little puppy you can toss around and say whatever you want to it.”

“Should we have let Thorkell take the kid? I mean, he doesn’t even know Kelly’s got relations to his pops and his mom.”

“He has two little demons he has to take care of already. He would’ve already tried to run away.” Bjorn grimaced, “not that Kel’s a terrible pops, no, that’d go to my deadbeat piece of shit dad, but it’s just that…”

Askeladd waited for him to finish. “ _You_ just have a way of raising him that he’s adapting far better to than a normal old family could do.”

“Then I wonder why he wants me to take his dad’s place.” Askeladd replied woefully, “ya heard that too.”

“And we both know ever since then you both have been playing this fucking silent treatment with each other.”

“He started it.”

Bjorn clicked his tongue, “Jesus, Asky, the problem is that the way you used to raise him ain’t always gonna work in the long run. Treating him like deadweight.”

“I’ve done some legitimate good things for him!”

“Using him as a scapegoat for your stupid shit that got you in trouble with the law isn’t exactly a favor.”

“I anointed him as head of the house and access to all my savings in case I die as the next person in line.”

“...Really something you shouldn’t be offering to him given the fact that he’d try to kill you on a daily basis.”

“He never wants to spend quality time with me regardless of what I do, Bjorn.” Askeladd said, a stubborn scowl etched on his face, “I offered to get him a motorcycle he’s been eyein’ for some time now. But I kinda held it off in case he got his shit together. ‘Cause you know, kids need to be disciplined properly. Says fuck you and insists he’d get a job. Since then he’s been comin’ home late and I found out from Cordelia he got a job at some repair shop across the street. He didn’t even tell me he got the job or anything, just came home one day and I noticed he had his uniform all folded up on his bed.”

“Do you ever ask him how he’s doing?” Bjorn questioned, “and I don’t mean the same how’s school bullshit. We already know that part. I mean in general.”

“Why?” Askeladd laughed, “what am I? That’s his therapist’s job, ain’t it?”

“It’s also a parent’s job.”

“He doesn’t wanna say shit to me so why should I push? It just ticks me off that the kid always acts like I’m the cause of what happened to Thors when we’re just helpin’ his mom out.”

“You think they’re easy, but when they go through something like that they start to develop a mind of their own.” Bjorn said, “the more you ignore it, the more you disconnect. Why the fuck did you agree to take care of the kid for Kel in the first place if you can’t even ask him if he’s doing alright?”

“Maybe I should’ve gotten him more happy meals.” Askeladd stroked his chin.

“Oh Jesus.” Bjorn asked for another drink. Asgeir shared his lament, although Askeladd didn’t seem to get what the problem was. “You’re still a fucking idiot after twenty years.”

“You got any better ideas, then?” Askeladd gruffed,

“I do,” Bjorn said, “the kid actually says one or two words to me compared to you.”

“Sounds like he sees you more like a dad than I’d ever be.”

“Believe it or not, he just _needs_ one. Liv, Astrid, and Cordelia love Kel ‘cause he makes sure to lend them helping hands when they need it. Maybe he might’ve not been there to clean all their fucking diapers but Hell does he show some dedication to makin’ sure that the world treats them right so they don’t turn out however the Hell Thorfinn did.”

Askeladd laughed sadly, “what the fuck are we doing then, Bjorn? I mean, I thought it’d be easy. Tryin’ to take in a fatherless kid.”

“We’re people who fool the capitalist system for a living.” Bjorn answered. “You tell me.”

“I don’t know.” Askeladd leaned forward on the counter. “...Did you think I’d make a good parent?”

“Fuck no.” Bjorn laughed. It’s rare, but the sound of it makes Askeladd’s chest feel a little lighter. “Never in a million fucking years.”

“You let me do it.”

“I’m not your parent.” Bjorn said. “But we do have that stupid fucking oath. So whatever you want, I don’t care. As long as it doesn’t put me in your deep shit. Unfortunately, it already did.”

“Did I make a mistake?”

“I think it’s a little too late to ask that question.” Bjorn answered. “He already takes it that you don’t give a shit about his life unless it benefits you. So once he’s done living in that house, he doesn’t see you in his future any longer.”

Askeladd reached inside his blazer and took his wallet out, slapping a few bills over the counter. “Asgeir.” he said, “I’ll probably be back tomorrow night.”

“Did you carpool here?” Bjorn asked.

“Atli’s a lifesaver.” Askeladd stumbled out his stool, and Bjorn knowingly got up.

“Get him home safely.” Asgeir told Bjorn directly.

Bjorn didn’t say anything, wrapping an arm around Askeladd’s side. He towered over Askeladd by a few inches. All taut muscle, a permanent frown, that’s why Askeladd often reminded him that he’s like a big, cuddly bear. Since they were teens. Eventually Bjorn stopped getting irritated by the nickname and let it slide. Bjorn drove here, and he helped Askeladd into his car first, shutting the door on his end and entering from the driver’s seat.

“Maybe I should just kick the kid out or somethin’ for a few days.” Askeladd said, “if he doesn’t like livin’ under my roof then he don’t gotta.”

“Fuck’s wrong with you?” Bjorn asked. “You can’t just do that.”

Askeladd didn’t bother to buckle his seatbelt, leaning against Bjorn. “Ask Helga if he could stay with them?”

“He’d be pissed if he found out you did that without telling him a word.”

“He’d be happier without me, and you know it.” Askeladd mumbled. “He’s old enough. Find his own place if I care. I don’t care if he doesn’t wanna talk to me. I’m the best parent anyone can ever confide in, if they need money, support, crazy good advice? I mean,” he laughed, “look at me! I gave him a roof to live under, you support him, Kelly does, the family appreciates him, and he just pushes it all away. He can just ask me. I can’t read signals.”

“How much did you drink?” Bjorn asked quietly.

“.....Don’ remember.” Askeladd’s eyes folded shut. “Say, been a while since I spent some time at your place.”

“Askeladd.”

“Who says we still can’t have fun?” Askeladd tilted his head to look up at Bjorn, “did I mention how much it gets me goin’ when you talk sense into me like that? You always know what to say. Like my hero.”

He smelt the cinnamon off Bjorn’s jacket, lifting himself off the other’s body and smirking at him gently. Bjorn’s response halted, starting up the car engine.

“I’ll book a stay at a motel.” Bjorn said, giving in. “No way am I letting you stay at my place and turn it into a shithole like you always did when you stayed over.”

“A gentleman.” Askeladd buckled his seatbelt, the booze buzzing in his system once they began driving. “...Always liked that about you, big bear.”

They had a new employee come into Ketil’s Repairs.

His name was also Thorfinn, apparently. However, Snake called him Bug Eyes, and they ran with that to clear up any confusion. It’s a suitable nickname. Easily startled dude who’d jump if someone slammed the door a little too hard or smacked a wrench against a wheel.

As if Thorfinn’s work days couldn’t get any busier, Einar said that Thorfinn had to train Bug Eyes. _An evaluation_ , he said. Thorfinn barely had been working here for more than three weeks now and having to train somebody else was not under his agenda. He didn’t do too good with leadership, but he’s grown too accustomed here to start rebelling against some unfair working conditions.

They had regulars that came in and out the shop and Snake wasted no time putting them front and center when it came to making business. It’d go smoothly if Bug Eyes wasn’t too intimidated by every fucking customer. Then Einar would just laugh and sweet talk them to make the encounter less awkward, only for the sake of the customer’s comfort. Most of the time Snake smoked in the office and read his magazines and was dragged out when he needed to put some work in.

Good news was that they were a set of four instead of three. It meant more hands for jobs that weren't just meant for one. Thorfinn actually began to like the extra company. They’d spend time talking after closing time and Hild and Gudrid found time to drop by when they could, with Gudrid’s baby brother, Karli. He was about four, adorable, and barely reacted to most things. But the shop actually kept watch of him when Gudrid’s aunt wasn’t around.

It also meant Thorfinn had the time to clear his schedule so he could attend those tutoring sessions with Canute. As for the bad news, still, Bug Eyes wasn’t that efficient at his job and not much of a fast learner as Thorfinn was. So Einar demanded that he’d stay for extra time to help him out. Each time, Canute doxxed that out of their next session and Thorfinn ended up having to attend extra hours. If he had enough, it’d total up to an extra day. Which was completely not his fault. But Canute claimed that every fucking hour counted.

He noticed that when he came home deadbeat tired and a mountain of homework he hadn’t touched that Askeladd just wasn’t home at all. It’s quite rare to come home to an empty house. The family only showed up because Bjorn and Askeladd invited them, though Thorfinn was positively sure they showed up uninvited. He figured Askeladd was working late. They don’t leave sticky notes or any of that shit, just left the house free for Thorfinn to roam. Piss with the bathroom door open, raid the fridge of all the beer, and play video games and scream as loud as he can and as long as he wants without being berated for it.

On the downside. Thorfinn’s stomach grumbled.

He could make a peanut butter sandwich. Order a pizza. Grab some chips. Bjorn usually cooked for him. Thorfinn could cook an egg and make grilled cheese, anything that required less than fifteen minutes of being in the kitchen he could whip up without question. Except…

The sandwiches that Karrianna made were _so much_ better.

Fuck playing video games.

He called Canute on the phone.

“Hey.” Thorfinn climbed out his window, landing safely on the ground. If he was going to leave the house he’d still be smart about it.

_“Why are you calling me, Thorfinn Karlsefni?”_

“Don’t get too excited. Is your dad home?”

_“No…? Ragnar’s also out right now, and Karrianna leaves once it’s ten thirty.”_

“Cool.” Thorfinn hung up the phone. He jogged up to the bus stop and hopped on once the bus arrived a few minutes later.

He’s been getting rides to Canute’s place since their deal began so he knew which stops led to where and followed the same path down the block where all the bigger, fancier homes resided.

Canute’s sending texts, confused. Thorfinn ignored it. He picked up a few rocks by the sidewalk and climbed up the tree by his house, throwing a couple at the window. Not too hard. He didn’t want to break it by accident.

He looked up at the window, putting down the book he was reading and walking up to the window cautiously. Thorfinn threw another rock, frowning. He should know by now that the only person who’d show up that he was expecting was him.

Canute opened the window. “Astra, stay back.” he whispered. The tiny kitten in question scurried away from the window. He turned back to Thorfinn, baffled, “ _are you mad?!_ ”

“Aren’t you home alone?”

“Why are you climbing this tree?! It’s dangerous!”

“I’ve climbed shit since I was six, princess. Now let me in. It’s cold as balls out here.”

Canute sighed, stepping back. Unfortunately there was a concerning bridge between the window and the branch Thorfinn was standing on. So he took a leap for the open window, and landed safely on the ledge. There’s a window sill seat right beneath that smoothed down the fall by a longshot.

“What are you doing here Thorfinn?” Canute checked outside the window, “I sincerely hope no one noticed you on your way here climbing our tree like a lunatic.”

“I came here alone.” Thorfinn hopped on his bed. “Disappointed?” he smirked.

“Very.” Canute shut the window. “We don’t have a session today. Did we speak of a change in schedule I’ve forgotten about or is this one of your spontaneous ideas?”

Thorfinn shrugged. “None.”

“I find that extremely hard to believe.” Canute took his glasses off and folded them neatly, placing it on his pristine white dresser.

Thorfinn was too embarrassed to admit the reason why he was really here. “Actually.” he said. “There was. I don’t think we finished the topic on exponential functions.”

Canute’s walking slowed. He tended to do this thing when he twidled around with a piece of his hair when he pondered on. “I thought we concluded that part of the topic. That’s the last we need to go over before the next test.”

“I know what I’m talking about.” Thorfinn glared, “anyways I wanted to do a fucking recap, so, let’s do it.”

“It’s quite late, don’t you think?” Canute grabbed his bag and sat on his bed next to Thorfinn. “Did you end work early?”

“I’m off today.” Thorfinn answered. “Just. Gym.” and therapy.

Canute didn’t question his surprise visit too much. Thorfinn automatically shut it down when questions got too personal. He wouldn’t try to ask the same of Canute when it’s not his business. So it only made sense to turn his visit into something they always did on the regular.

His stomach growling during it gave away the sole reason. Didn’t take too long.

Canute looked at his phone set neatly on his bedside. “Oh, just in the nick of time.” He said. “I was actually baking.”

Thorfinn blinked, “you were what.”

“Cookies.”

“But you were reading when I showed up.”

“That’s because it was in the _oven._ ” Canute rolled his eyes.

“It’s past your bedtime for that shit, isn’t it?”

Canute flushed, “maybe so.” he admitted, “but he’s not home. So. I’d like to do something during my free time.”

“Oh, goody two shoes like to break a few rules?”

“Perfect you’re here.” Canute smiled. “I need a volunteer for a taste test, anyway.”

Thorfinn had no idea what the fuck that meant, until he’s led downstairs into the big kitchen and the pleasant smell of freshly baked cookies hit him. Canute slipping on red oven mitts, carefully pulling a tray out the oven and sliding it on the island counter.

They let it cool down for a bit. “It’s supposed to be for a bake sale.” Canute responded, offering Thorfinn a single cookie, “but I’m trying out new recipes. Chocolate chip, peanut butter, and M&M’s.”

“Am I your fucking test dummy now?” Thorfinn asked, taking a bite anyway. He’s not going to lie, the first time Canute sent them cookies as a gift he finished them in under two hours. There’s a reason for that. The chewy deliciousness of the chocolate was incredibly _good_. “They’re alright.” he said. He tried each cookie of different flavor.

“Such thoughtful critique.” Canute said, unconvinced.

“Well they don’t taste burnt.”

“I have experience.”

“Like you’re a next fucking Chef Boyardee?”

“I’ve been baking with Ragnar since I was six myself.” Canute explained, “I usually trust his critique. But he’s been very busy with work lately. Just like daddy does.”

“He’s probably playing cards or some shit with your dad and Askeladd.” Thorfinn shoved his hands in his pockets, eating another cookie. “He ain’t home either.”

“Is that why you’re here?”

“Not really.” Thorfinn lied. Canute smacked his hand before he could eat another cookie.

“ _These_ are for the school’s bake sale. Not for _you_. If you’d like another, do more than just freeload my home and help me pack these up.”

“How many of these do you gotta make?”

“I actually have to make one more batch.” Canute pointed at the three fancily wrapped boxes of containers off to the side of the counter. “So I’m going to be up quite a bit. Since you’re here, you might as well help me.”

“Baking fucking cookies?” Thorfinn scoffed, “do I look like a chef to you?”

“I can teach you preferably, but you lack any qualities of someone remotely teachable.”

“I just tasted your stupid cookies for you, if I was a dick, I would’ve said they were shit.”

“Maybe if you help me,” Canute side-eyed him, “I’d allow you the grace of trying another. Almond cookies.”

Thorfinn didn’t have anything better to do. Besides, he hadn’t eaten since lunch. The leftovers he’s been living off of thanks to Bjorn wasn’t going to last forever and he’d eventually have to whip up something of his own, and he was far too lazy to do that. So he helped Canute in baking another batch of cookies. It’s a ton of ingredients to follow through and he insisted he’d look it over himself, but he was struggling, and this was clearly Canute’s strong-suit. So he was being a smug little shit about it.

“Okay, I get it.” Thorfinn shoved the bowl Canute’s way they used for mixing their batter, “you’re the expert here. Instead of rubbing it in my face show me how to do this.”

“I thought you’d never ask.”

“I never planned on it.”

“Quite simple.”

Thorfinn wanted to fling the spoon at that pretty face of his. But they’ve already gotten flour on them after running around the kitchen for another hour, and he was able to just barely pour the batter into the pan without making a mess. He put it in the oven, and they spent another half hour fixing up the kitchen. It turned into a full hour when Canute _accidentally_ wiped flour on his nose when he made a remark about how he could do this with his eyes closed.

The kitchen had to be cleaned all over again or else Canute would have a heart attack if Ragnar came back and saw it was turned into a disaster. In the meantime, Canute took out the tray from the oven and set it on top of the counter. His phone started going off. Thorfinn wiped the sweat off his brow, the kitchen hotter than usual from opening the oven and being hard at work. His hair tied up into a ponytail. He saw Canute’s phone vibrating and Edmund’s name flashed on the screen.

“Your boyfriend’s calling.” Thorfinn idly walked for the fridge and found a bottle of water to open up and take a sip out of. What he didn’t pick up on was that Canute left his phone haphazardly on the edge of the counter in a hurry to take the cookies out before they got burnt. He was cleaning himself up, turning around and realizing it was about to slip right off. He lunged for it, his hand hitting the edge of the scorching hot tray of cookies and he screamed in pain.

“Fuck.” Thorfinn spilled his water, squeezing it on accident when he slammed it on the counter and rushed toward Canute. He didn’t catch his phone in time, it dropped face first on the floor and the counter was quite a far height up from the tiled kitchen floor. That didn’t matter, though. “Idiot.” Canute didn’t have an oven mitt on his right hand because he was using it to clean up. He took Canute’s hand and inspected the burn on it. It’s blistering.

They went over to the sink and Thorfinn immediately ran cold water over it. Canute winced.

Neither of them said anything. Though Thorfinn did notice the prickling tears in Canute’s eyes. He sighed to himself.

“You got vaseline anywhere?” Thorfinn asked.

Canute blinked. “Um. Should be in the bathroom down the hall, to the right…”

“Sit here.” Thorfinn said, guiding him back to the stool at the island.

This house was so fucking big he still had trouble navigating which room was which when there was twenty in this damn house. Astra followed behind him. It seemed like she was his guide, because whenever he was lost she’d call out to him and wait for him to follow before she led him to the right room. The bathroom Canute referred to. There was a large posh shelf where a couple bath products, soaps, and antiques sat upon. One of which was a tiny pack of petroleum jelly.

There was also a first aid kit handy in one of the cabinets.

He looked down at Astra. “Thanks.” he grumbled. Her response was a vague gesture of acknowledgement, turning around and running off. Canute’s still waiting in the living room, barely having moved from where Thorfinn told him to sit.

“Don’t put any other ointments on this shit.” Thorfinn said, carefully spreading the vaseline over the burn, and Canute’s eyes scrunched shut, biting his lip to hide another whimper of pain. “That’s how it gets infected. Just put this on a couple times a day.”

“I didn’t take it you were knowledgeable in first aid.”

“When you go hunting with your psycho family that often brutally beat the shit out of each other for a living, you kinda need to learn how to do that shit on your own.” Thorfinn said.

“You’d be better off as a paramedic, but I doubt you have the skill of patience for that.” Canute teased.

He’s probably right. Thorfinn didn’t say anything else other than a scoff, bandaging up his wrist. “I got it.” He said.

“Got what?”

“I’ll pack up the rest. Just tell me what to do.”

Canute obliged. Once Thorfinn stacked the boxes on top of each other, Canute picked up his phone.

“Oh dear.” He feared, “Ragnar’s going to kill me.”

“Did it crack?” Thorfinn asked.

“What does _this_ look like to you?” Canute showed him his phone.

“You could easily get a new one, right?”

“...Maybe if I didn’t just get this one about two weeks ago because I dropped it in a sewer.”

“How the fuck did you—”

“—I don’t know! It was when we had that storm and I had to run home late so I’d dropped it in a hurry.”

“No wonder why he’d be fucking pissed.” Thorfinn said. He thought about something. “Hold on. I got an idea.”

“What?”

“When’s Ragnar coming back?”

“...Not until morning.”

“Hm.” Thorfinn pulled his phone out, sending a text to Bug Eyes.

As soon as he received a text back, Thorfinn cocked his head to the door.

“C’mon.” He said.

“W-Where are we going?”

“I know somebody.”

Einar and Snake knew a couple connections around town. First, he needed to borrow a bike, because he preferred they’d make it there and back in one piece. Bug Eyes left one there for him when they stopped there.

“What is this place?” Canute asked.

“This is where I work.” Thorfinn replied, “don’t worry. Just borrowin’ it.” He looked at Canute and frowned. “Well you gonna get on or not?”

“I sincerely hope you know what you’re doing.” Canute got on behind him.

“Did you bring the phone with you?” Thorfinn ignored him, asking.

“I did.”

Thorfinn didn’t wait, veering off. Canute scrambled to hold onto him. Neither of them are wearing helmets.

Garm’s place isn’t very far. His shop’s open during the late hours and people only came here if they wanted to do sketchy business, mostly dealing dope, but he also did tattoos and piercings, so he’s running a joint shop. It looked mundane on the outside like any open vendor, a back door led to the inside where he had his second shop properly set up.

“Yo.” His wild blond hair came into view when he lifted his head from the counter. Canute walked closely behind Thorfinn. He smiled, shark bite piercings on his lower lip and another on his tongue whenever he grinned wide or laughed.

“You Garm?” Thorfinn asked.

“Einar and Snake send you here?”

“Bug Eyes did.”

“Ah.” Garm leaned over the counter, “it’s a bit too late to be askin’ for tats. But I do do walk-ins.”

“Not right now.” Thorfinn said, “how much does it cost to fix a broken screen?”

“Not even here to ask for the good stuff?” Garm asked.

“Do you repair phones or not?”

Garm sighed, “lemme see it.”

Canute hesitantly handed his phone to Thorfinn, and he showed it to Garm.

“Not too bad. A hundred bucks.”

“You can do it for fifty.” Thorfinn responded.

“Well I ain’t got a discount. A hunny in cash, dude.”

Thorfinn clicked his tongue, “just gimme the tools then and I can fix it myself for half the price.”

“Good bargain.” Garm mused. “Sixty.”

Thorfinn rolled his eyes, and he added another ten to the total, sliding it over the counter.

“I could pay for it.” Canute insisted.

“No, save your money.” Thorfinn refused. “I can pay for it.”

Garm handed the tools over. “Sure you don’t need anything else? I got a pretty good selection.”

“Nah.” Thorfinn took the tools.

“I’ll be out back.” Garm winked, “I gotta take a call anyway. Nice doing business with you.” he pulled his phone out and opened the door to the other shop. Thorfinn scoffed.

“Did he just offer us drugs?” Canute asked. Thorfinn placed his phone down and worked on detaching the cracked screen.

“He deals.” Thorfinn responded coolly. “At least everyone I know knows Garm deals. Even your rich friends.”

“So you know him.”

“Not really. The guys I work with do. He drops by sometimes to talk and shit, do business on our block.” Thorfinn snorted, “He’s fucking weird as shit. But he’s your go-to if you want cheap dope.”

Canute appeared uncomfortable to be here. He even went as far as to put on some hand sanitizer he kept in his pocket to rub on his hands. “Just make this quick. I’m not even supposed to be out around this time.”

“I’m workin’ as fast as I fucking can. Or else you wanna show Ragnar your broken screen ‘cause you touched a hot pan of cookies.”

“I didn’t know you knew how to do this.”

“It’s not that hard.” Thorfinn said. He disassembled the parts briefly to do a bit of tweaking, then put it back together carefully. “So you ignoring calls from him?”

“From who?” Canute asked defensibly.

“Your rich boyfriend.”

“Stop calling him that.”

“Sounded like a desperate call. But I noticed you didn’t even bother to call him back.”

“I already know you have your qualms about him.” Canute said, “but any reason you have to despise him is disingenuous.”

“I noticed ever since he found out we’re together him and your little friends don’t look too happy.” Thorfinn answered, “probably it’s because I’m a delinquent.”

“That’s quite obvious.”

Thorfinn took more offense to that than he should’ve. “You’re the one who begged to date said delinquent.”

“It’s to make a compromise.” Canute said, a weak argument, if you asked Thorfinn. “They’re just not as supportive of my decision as I expected them to be. But you needn’t worry, I’m not going to let your _lifestyle_ be detrimental to my future.”

“The fuck do you think you know about my life?” Thorfinn looked him in the eye, and Canute’s gaze flit away. “A little harsh, princess. I thought you’d be a little more open after we kissed the other night.”

“I know as much as needed.” Canute flushed slightly, “father doesn’t think too highly of your type, either.”

Thorfinn stepped closer to Canute, far enough to have him pinned against the wall. He stared up at Canute’s frame, stiffening once he felt Thorfinn’s breath fanning over his face.

“None of your friends give a shit about you if they don’t support your choice.” Thorfinn said, “sounds like culinary school’s not important if you don’t wanna date someone like me, huh?”

Canute turned his face away. Thorfinn noticed he was trembling. “It’s none of your concern.”

“What is?”

“What they think about you.”

Thorfinn pushed himself off Canute, staring down at his bandaged hand he brought to his chest. He handed Canute his phone, throwing his hood over his head. He left toward his bike without another word, and Canute rushed after him.

Thorfinn didn’t come back inside after he dropped Canute off. He kept his gaze ahead, taking the motorbike back to the shop and taking off on foot. He thanked Bug Eyes for promising that he’d take care of it later, taking the bus back home.

Something him and Canute had in common tonight.

Coming back to an empty house.

Gudrid told them about a Halloween party someone they knew was throwing at lunch.

Thorfinn bitterly watched Canute’s friends pamper him after he got his hand burnt the night he snuck in. He’s getting all this sympathy after spending hours prepping for the bake sale it was pathetic.

He’s probably leaving out the part where Thorfinn helped him patch up that wound himself.

“Hey.” Hild caught Thorfinn’s attention. “You going?”

“To where?” Thorfinn scoffed, resting a knee on the bench so he could put his hand against his cheek.

“Revna’s party.” Gudrid said. She wiggled her eyebrows, “Canute’s coming. Guess what I heard he’s dressing up as?”

“I don’t care.” Thorfinn drank from his can of coke.

“Bunny.”

Thorfinn spit out his drink on the table.

Hild smirked at him. “You got a thing for bunnies, Karlsefni?”

“Shut the fuck up.” Thorfinn croaked, “you’re fucking serious?”

“Yeah. They’re all doing some kinda thing. I don’t know.” Gudrid shrugged, “But I’m gonna be a pirate!”

“Huh.” Thorfinn looked at Hild, “you’re going to this shit too?”

“Well. She’s. Uh. She’s going.” Hild admitted, “so she convinced me to dress up as a biker.”

“You already do.”

“Exactly.”

“You should come!” Gudrid exclaimed, “Snake’s our ride. He said that him and Einar would come along to see the hype.”

“They’re basically chaperoning.”

“Not really.”

“I’ll pass.” Thorfinn said. Those were never really his thing.

“You’re off work this Friday. Do you have plans?”

“Sure I do. I got. Gym stuff.”

Gudrid’s not convinced. “After the gym?”

“Pssh.” Thorfinn snorted, “...I got shit to do. Obviously.”

“Sure.” Hild munched on a chicken tender. “Well when you’re done doing your busy shit, we’ll be at Revna’s Friday night.”

The look in her eye was pleading that Thorfinn come along so that she’s not alone with Gudrid at a rowdy party. Thorfinn’s not having it.

He had plans.

He had a life.

He most _definitely_ had a life.

...That was, playing video games all night and screaming at people through a microphone online. Snacking on everything in the fridge. Hating everything and everyone.

Askeladd isn’t at home as much as he should be. Every now and then, however, he told Thorfinn if there was food in the fridge or how was work, the gym, or his session with Dr. Davis.

He’d admit that it took him off guard because they hadn’t had a proper conversation in so long. It was quite short, however. Then Askeladd would go back to watching TV and minded his own business. He could hear Askeladd and Bjorn conversing at the dinner table from upstairs, and turned his volume up to tune out any distractions.

Everyone he followed on Instagram talked about this stupid party. Thorfinn ignored it. He’d just play video games all night so that it passed and he wouldn’t have to hear about what he missed. At least, that was the original plan. Ragnar said that his services wouldn’t be needed for the week to allow him the grace of a break, and it made it better so that he didn’t have to awkwardly face Canute. The other did a good job at pretending they hadn’t even met up at all. Formally greeted him in the halls and flashed smiles. So it’s back to being civil again. Mrs. Gro said he had the highest test score of the class the day prior and Thorfinn was a little envious. That title usually went to him. He left the room feeling bitter instead of saying good job.

His father’s anniversary passed and Ylva telling him that he should stop doing fuck-all with his life was getting to his head.

The night of the party, Askeladd said he’d be home late.

There’s no fucking way he’s dressing up for this shitty stupid party. So he showed up there, surprisingly, he wasn’t all that out of place. Some people preferred to just show up dressed down in their own unique ways and Thorfinn blended in quite easily.

There’s a massive swarm of people everywhere. A girl with a big pirate hat stood out in the crowd and Thorfinn mistook her as being someone else at first, but she turned around, and she shouted his name. “FINNY!”

_Finny?_

No one’s ever called him a nickname before.

Thorfinn met up with her, and the rest were there. Just less noticeable. Hild had a black bandanna around her hair, a black eyepatch on. As expected, her biker outfit didn’t vary too much from her usual outfits. Snake and Einar didn’t dress up either, but they were wearing something casual, and it’s weird to see them out of their work uniforms at a regular event.

“You didn’t dress up either?” Einar asked, “oh thank God. I thought we’d look weird.”

“You already do.” Hild said. “You’re like, one of the oldest people here.”

“Not grandpa.” Thorfinn pointed at a man probably about Askeladd’s age drinking from a keg while a crowd of people cheered him on. “I think you two are fine.”

“Haha… Revna did mention her grandpa’s still got a lot of spirit left in him.” Gudrid said.

“Maybe tonight a heart attack will take that spirit out of him.” Snake deadpanned.

“I thought you were busy.” Hild answered. Her eye said _thank God you’re here_ , however. She handed him a drink.

“Well I’m done being busy.” Thorfinn grumbled. His eyes were hooked in on Canute and fuck Gudrid wasn’t lying.

 _Fucking bunnies._ The ears and the shoes and _fucking Jesus Christ._ He looked away.

Gudrid had a lot of friends of her own here, so they dragged her off to play some beer pong.

“We’re gonna be over there having a joint.” Snake said, “none of the other shit here interests us all that much, so if you need something, we’ll be over there.”

“Don’t have too much fun now.” Einar winked. The two men left on the couch. They didn’t take too long to blend right in with a couple stoners on the couch. Leaving just Hild and Thorfinn there to bask in the absolute destruction unfolding in front of them.

Her eye, however, was on Gudrid. Laughing brightly and bouncing around in her cute pirate outfit.

“What the fuck is she doing?” Hild asked. Another guy twirled her around while they danced and talked gleefully, and she high-fived her friend when she made a score. Taking a drink out of one of the red cups.

“Playing beer pong?” Thorfinn asked, as if it were obvious.

“No.” Hild sighed. “I mean. What is she doing hanging out with me?”

“Isn’t she your friend?”

“W-Well… yeah…” Hild marched over to the drink table and Thorfinn cluelessly followed her, pouring whatever drink she could find and downing all of its contents in one-go. “Ugh, I just— _she’s too good for me_!”

Thorfinn’s… still not following. “Fuck’s wrong with you?” he handed her a jug of water, “don’t drink too much of that shit without drinking water, it’s gonna make your insides explode.”

She snatched it away and drank it right out of the jug without even bothering to pour one into a damn cup, gasping when she slammed it on the table. “She’s just good. To me.”

“Yeah.”

“Everyone loves Gudrid. It’s because she’s so nice. I mean she even befriended you and you have a reputation of beating the shit out of everyone who even looks at you wrong.”

“Fair enough.” Thorfinn agreed.

“Thing is, that’s the problem. She has all these people who’d die to be her friend, so much closer to her but then she chooses me. Like I don’t get it. Her friend is all I could ever even be…” she trailed off and looked at Thorfinn, her face flushed instantly.

“Puckett.” Thorfinn stared dead at her, “...do you _like_ Gudrid?”

“Pfft.” Hild cackled, “what? No! No. No I just. No. We’re friends. Like, I could never.”

“Okay…”

Hild heard a bunch of bustling laughter and it belonged to Canute and his group of friends. “Do you like Canute?”

Thorfinn was almost offended she even asked that question, “fuck no.” he snorted. “God, no. Like I said. It’s fake. It’s not real. I don’t even… fucking… see us actually dating for real, I mean no fucking way.”

“Cool.” The two of them stood side by side, a little buzzed up, and fading in and out of reality.

Something snapped in their brains then and there.

 _“I swear to God if you tell anyone I’ll kill you_ —” both of them said at the same time. They stopped, and glared at each other.

“Who wants to arm wrestle the all-time champion! Svend?! Winner gets fifty bucks!”

Hild took her jacket off. “Listen to me, Karlsefni.” she muttered to him, “you and I never spoke about this, ever.”

“Likewise.” Thorfinn said, and he took off his jacket as well.

“Wait a sec!” Bo, one of Svend’s friends, stopped them. “In order to face off with him you gotta enter the arm wrestling tournament.”

“Alright.” Thorfinn said. “You go first.”

“I can end this tournament in five minutes.” Hild said.

“Like Hell you can.”

“Wanna time me?”

“You’re on.”

Hild took about four minutes and twenty three seconds to get through all the participants, which immensely shriveled up their massive egos, and beat Svend within thirty. Now she had a whole crowd intensely watching her, more than psyched to see that she’s won.

Thorfinn didn’t have high hopes he could beat her score too far off, but he wanted to just by a couple seconds more.

And then Bo had the nerve to call him _shorty_ right before the match between them started. So Thorfinn broke his arm.

“Oh.” Thorfinn watched him scream in agony while his friends crowded around him. “My bad.”

“What the fuck, Karlsefni?!”

“My hand slipped.”

“Four minutes and nineteen seconds.” Hild nodded in approval, “not bad. Still, if it weren’t for Kare I would’ve knocked it down to three minutes.”

Thorfinn shucked his jacket back on. “I was just being generous.”

“Hild!” Gudrid shouted, “oh my God that was awesome! You’re so strong!”

“It’s not that big a deal.” Hild laughed, “they’re just weak.”

“We should arm wrestle too!”

“I-I think I’m exhausted.”

“Let’s go sit somewhere.” Gudrid practically dragged her away and Thorfinn offered no help to the look of panic in Hild’s eye. He wanted somewhere to have a smoke, so he left the living room for one of the balconies upstairs.

“He’s not who you think he is.” He overheard someone speaking as he lit up a cigarette.

“You know who he is. You’ve seen how many fights he’s gotten into.”

“Why does that concern you?”

“You broke off what we had just so you can go after some dropout?”

“I thought we both agreed it’d be best to focus on our studies and wait until after graduation.”

“Just because our fathers’ businesses are clashing with each other doesn’t mean we have to keep it cordial. We can ignore all that.”

“My father never liked us seeing each other for that sole reason.”

They stopped when Thorfinn walked in. He knew it was Canute and Edmund quarreling about their dumb shit, and he could care less. “Get lost if you’re gonna whine about shit.” he said, “I’m just here to get some fresh air.”

“I can’t believe this.” Edmund brushed passed Thorfinn, entering the house.

“How much did you hear?” Canute asked.

“That’s not a dropout’s business to tell, is it?” Thorfinn didn’t glance at Canute.

“He’s just.”

“Hmm, scared that I’ll corrupt you?”

“Thorfinn.”

“He doesn’t have to worry about shit.” Thorfinn said, “just tell him that it’s not serious.”

“H-He wouldn’t believe it if I tried to explain myself. We broke it off last year because of our parents, and I said it’d be best if we just focused on our separate futures.”

“It’s not a smart idea to get into a thing with me right after you broke it off with him is it?”

“That’s more than enough time for him to get over it.”

“Have you?”

“Does it worry you to not know the answer to that?”

Thorfinn scoffed, “whatever.” Just so happened that Askeladd waited for the worst moment to pop in and rub Sweyn’s shoulders while he’s in the middle of a war with another rivaling corporate company. The man’s getting old. Everyone wanted to use this chance to take his seat because he can’t run the business forever.

“I heard you broke Bo’s arm.”

“Bo’s a dick.”

“As expected of you.” Canute said. “So you were able to make it without trouble?”

“I hate this shit.” Thorfinn took another puff, “I’m only here because I got nothin’ better to do. Sorry to break in on your slapfight.”

Canute rubbed his arms, even through his jacket he still shivered in the jumpsuit. “It’s not what you think. They care about me. That’s all.”

“Yeah, sure.”

“They want the best for me. Even if they brush me aside sometimes.”

“That don’t sound like friends to me.”

“What would you know?”

Thorfinn put out his cigarette, “well the people I hang out with? They don’t judge me for the shit I do, though I still question why they even hang out with me. They don’t act like they have a stick shoved up their ass and they don’t annoy me. They be themselves.” he looked at Canute, “maybe your friends could learn a thing or two from them.”

He was about to leave when Canute followed him.

“I’d like to see for myself.” He said.

By the time Thorfinn and Canute came back, Snake, Einar, Gudrid, and Hild were unwinding by joining the others on the dance floor and goofing off. If anything, they didn’t question that Canute wanted to join them at all. They joined in on some of the party activities. Thorfinn didn’t exactly do much of the dancing, but he felt himself growing comfortable being here.

It’s weird. This was what it felt like to have friends to be comfortable around. He pretty much ignored any glares of Canute’s friends and that gave him more fuel to enjoy himself instead of sulking all night. They convinced Thorfinn to do a keg stand. He’s had enough alcohol hanging out with Askeladd and company whenever they were together tearing his house apart to know he had a strong alcohol tolerance. But Canute was too scared to drink another cup with the fear of getting tipsy. Einar and Snake was the party’s favorite in under an hour.

He’s starting to forget the loneliness he felt when he’d come home hoping that he’d say more than a few words to Askeladd instead of nothing at all.

 _Missing_ Askeladd.

Jesus Christ he’s drinking too fucking much.

“I gotta take a piss.” Thorfinn told the others, and he ventured the large house for the bathroom. He accidentally stumbled into one room where a bunch of guys, looking older than most of them here, having a serious conversation. The strong smell of weed hit the air.

“Shit, sorry.” Thorfinn shut the door. He’s far too relaxed. Too relaxed to register that there’s a drug deal going on in that room, probably. But who cares. Another room two people, or more, were having sex in. He just walked out and found the bathroom two doors down to his right. Fucking finally.

When he finished, he went downstairs. Einar’s yammering about some story to them while they stood at a corner, listening attentively. Thorfinn joined them, hands shoved in his pockets.

“Yo,” he said, “I think there’s some kinda drug deal going on upstairs in one of the rooms.”

His comment kind of flew over their heads when the party was at full swing and the atmosphere of the dimmed lights was enough to make them all lightheaded.

“And so he comes in all angry at me because he thinks that I fucking slept with her!” Einar continued.

“Wait, wait,” Snake stopped Einar’s story, “Finn, what did you say you just saw?”

“Um. Drug deal.”

“Where?”

“...Upstairs?”

“Whoa, whoa.” Hild laughed, “holy shit. Did you see cash?”

“I don’t fucking know.” Thorfinn said, “I just needed to find the bathroom.”

“Revna is kinda dating that one kid who deals a ton.” Gudrid explained, “maybe he was like, in there?”

“I hadn’t known that.” Canute said.

“Dude, they been going out since sophomore year.” Hild told him. It suddenly didn’t seem like a big deal anymore that someone they knew was using their house to talk cartel business at a Halloween party, completely unsuspecting.

Until gunshots ripped through the house.

People began to scream bloody murder and scattered like scared mice. Trampling over one another to get the fuck out of the house.

There’s another group of men here with ski masks over their faces.

“Oh great. It’s a gang war.” Snake muttered.

“I beg your pardon?!” Canute screeched.

“GANGS?!” Gudrid cried out.

“Out! Out!” Snake demanded, “we gotta get the fuck out of here!”

Just as they’re running another gunshot sent flying ripped right through Einar’s arm, and he dropped to the floor, swearing loudly.

“Shit!” Thorfinn stopped to help him up.

“C’mon!” Hild shouted after them. Canute got shoved out the way to the floor while the other people in the house were scrambling to leave.

Snake ran back to help Einar out himself. Thorfinn rushed toward Canute, lifting him up.

“You good?” he asked.

“I’m fine.” Canute let go of him.

“Can you run?”

Canute nodded.

“Hey!”

They turned around. It’s Revna’s fucking boyfriend, holding a backpack in his hands. His snapback flipped off his head in the stampede and his stupid cheesy gold chain dangled from his neck. “I’m sorry man.” he shoved the backpack to Thorfinn’s chest.

“What the fuck is this?!” Thorfinn asked.

“Just deliver it.”

“To who?!”

“Just do what they ask!” He ran off.

They left the house, finding the rest of the group outside. The sound of a siren wailing in the distance meant that their time here was definitely up.

“What is that?” Canute asked.

“I don’t have a single fucking clue.” Thorfinn said.

“Everyone get in my truck.” Snake demanded. He’s surprisingly the calmest in this situation, “I drove here.”

“Are you okay?!” Gudrid asked Einar.

“No, I got shot!” He shouted.

“Where’s Edmund and everyone else?” Canute asked, trying to look through the sea of fleeing people if there was anyone with a recognizable face.

“It’s either you risk getting arrested finding them or you leave with us.” Thorfinn said. “Your choice, Sweynson.”

Snake didn’t wait. They’re already helping Einar into the truck and piling inside. Thorfinn grabbed his hand before he could make a proper decision.

“I can’t just leave them there!”

“Newsflash! Chances are they already ditched you too!”

“Get the fuck in the car!” Snake honked the horn, “what the Hell are you two waiting for?!”

“I can’t believe I’m doing this.” Canute said, panicked, “I can’t believe this is happening.”

“Yeah well, me neither.” Thorfinn opened the door and they squeezed themselves in the back seat. He’s been through this rodeo a billion times already.

“We should go to the hospital.” Gudrid said, trying to stop the blood from Einar’s wound.

“No.” Einar grit out. “We’re not going to the damn hospital.”

“So you’re just gonna bleed to death?” Hild asked. “Dude!”

“My father’s going to kill me.” Canute said. “ _Ragnar’s_ going to kill me.”

“I think it’s too late to be worryin’ about that.” Thorfinn quipped.

“Snake he’s bleeding!” Gudrid exclaimed, perturbed.

“Everybody shut the fuck up.” Snake started up the car, “I know where we’re going.”

Their next destination was the repair shop. “We’re gonna get the wound out his arm ourselves.” Snake said.

“Us?” Gudrid questioned.

“Who else?! Now help him get out of the damn car!” Snake called Bug Eyes on the phone, “unlock the door. We got a situation.”

They had no choice but to oblige, his groans sounded like it was quite painful. Helping him onto the table in the office, and scrambling around for a pair of tweezers, tongs, whatever the fuck they could find, and settled for what they had to pull out the bullet. Gudrid and Canute found a first aid kit. Hild found some water and a towel. Snake and Thorfinn found some tools with the help of Bug Eyes.

“Motherfucker.” Einar wheezed. “Shot me right in the arm!”

“Way to go, Einar.” Hild sighed.

“How is this my fault?!”

“You just decided to get shot!”

_“So it’s my fault?!”_

“Throw out the bullet.” Snake told one of them. Gudrid wrapped the bullet up in the bloody towel and threw it away.

“How is it that any of this even occurred?” Bug Eyes asked, “you’re telling me a bunch of gang members shot up a party? A high school party?”

“Welcome to Vinland.” Hild said, feigning a chirpy manner.

“Is he gonna be okay?” Gudrid asked Snake. Einar’s lying down on the table still, but he’s not in as much pain as he was before they yanked the bullet out his arm.

“Yeah.” Snake waved a hand. “Just give it a week or two.”

“Thorfinn.” Canute said, “are you going to tell them about the backpack?”

He was so caught up with getting Einar to the shop that he almost forgot. Revna’s boyfriend was a piece of shit. Thorfinn sighed heavily.

“Oh, yeah.” Thorfinn dropped the backpack from his shoulder, and tossed it on the floor. “Endre gave me this before he got cuffed by the cops.”

Everyone in the shop froze.

“Karlsefni.” Hild asked carefully, “...what the fuck is in the backpack?”

“If anyone wants to check for themselves, be my guest.”

No one wanted to check the bag. They stood put where they were, like it was a bomb or something far worse.

Snake rolled his eyes, “oh for fuck’s sake.” he bent down and opened the bag, and that’s when they stalked closer to it, looming over with precaution.

As if this night didn’t go south quick enough. Even Einar had sat up, his arm bandaged up now. Their eyes bulging at what they found inside the backpack.

“Yep.” Snake said. Once again, his calmness baffling, but also to no one’s surprise. “It’s drugs.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: thorfinn was given a backpack full of drugs. einar got shot. boy none of this sounds good at all. i wonder what the fuck they're gonna do next. find out next week!
> 
> My twitter, spotify, and curiouscat:
> 
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	7. Coping with loneliness is the worst mechanism

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Thorfinn reconsiders what it's like to have company and yearns for the joy of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry to get a little angstyyyy

“What now?!” Bug Eyes asked, appalled.

 _“DRUGS?!”_ Canute and Gudrid shrieked at the same time.

“Yeah.” Snake said without missing a beat.

“Why the fuck do you have this bag with you?!” Hild asked Thorfinn.

“In case no one was listening the first time,” Thorfinn glared, “ _Endre_ gave this to me.”

“Endre Askinas?” Einar asked strangely.

They all looked at him.

“I think he’s one of Garm’s top connects.” Einar explained. With another grunt, he shuffled slightly. “Young, but he does the job.”

“He got arrested tonight.” Thorfinn explained. “He threw his fucking dope at me and told me to deliver it.”

“To where?” Snake asked.

“Hell if I know!”

“I can’t be involved in this.” Canute said, “I was supposed to be at this party to see my own friends, to see Edmund, and then _this happens_.”

“Slow down princess. You’re just as much as an accomplice as all of us are.” Thorfinn said.

“Me?!”

“Yes you!”

“Thorfinn’s the one with the bag.” Hild said. He looked at her, betrayed, and she shrugged. Giving him a knowing look. “Maybe he thought you’d be the delivery guy.”

“The only time I spoke to Endre was when I punched him in the face for pulling a prank on me in the boys locker room.” Thorfinn said. “It’s not like we’re fucking friends or anything.”

“I think we’re missing the point here.” Snake intervened, “A connect gives you a package, it means they are placing the responsibility on you entirely.”

“That doesn’t mean we have to go through with it, right?” Bug Eyes questioned, “haha, we can just— throw it in the ocean?”

“That’s a great idea!” Gudrid agreed, “let’s get rid of it.”

“Except.” Snake said, “the cops open an investigation contemplating where these drugs were smuggled off to.”

“They won’t know we have it.” Hild scoffed. “Endre got his dumbass arrested.”

“Here’s the thing,” Einar wheezed out, “he’s bound to snitch that he doesn’t have the drugs.”

“To get himself more time in prison?” Thorfinn asked, “well that’s a pretty stupid idea.”

“Juvie.” Canute corrected firmly.

“Same difference.”

“Not exactly.”

“To get himself out.” Snake answered. “Sure he’s gonna face heat from the connects because their rivals tried to take ‘em out. They fucked up once they got the cops involved, and now they have less time to deliver it.”

“You guys aren’t expecting me to deliver it.” Thorfinn looked at them. No one said anything. He looked at Snake and Einar, “you guys know this dude by proxy!”

“We also have a professional business to run.” Snake gestured to his shop which they were currently sheltering themselves in until the fiasco several blocks away died down, “we’re gonna get heat if we keep a backpack full of drugs in our fuckin’ store.”

“No can do.” Einar refused.

Bug Eyes shook his head furiously, “n-no way man.”

“Don’t look at me.” Hild scowled.

“I am not involved in this.” Canute said.

“Trust me I’m the worst person at hiding things.” Gudrid declined as well, “plus my aunt searches my room a lot!”

“Yeah so we should just let Thorfinn keep the bag.” Thorfinn said, “pretty asshole-ish.” he was more directing that toward his fellow classmates than his superiors.

“Listen kid, we’re not saying we won’t help you out.” Snake clarified, “...but Endre gave that to you, and your name is gonna come outta his mouth when his buddies ask him why the fuck he doesn’t have the coke. You understand that this is serious shit, and we can’t just let anyone take this.” he zipped up the backpack, lifted it up, and threw it back at Thorfinn. This was heavier than bricks. “You kinda mentioned your family’s already been through some crazy shit.”

Thorfinn sighed. “I was never part of _this_!”

“From today on you’re now a cartel delivery boy.” Snake winked. “And every single one of us is helping him.”

The rest of them didn’t sound too pleased upon hearing that. “We’re suspects regardless because we were all at that party.”

“I truly believe he should just hand it over to the cops.” Canute said.

“Yeah sure, give them a backpack full of coke and tell them that one of my buddies just gave it to me because he thought I’d like to keep them while he’s being interrogated by the police.” Thorfinn answered sarcastically, “they would totally understand and be like _you’re doing such good deeds by turning in drugs without completely turning yourself in_!”

“I don’t want anything to do with this!”

“Neither do I!”

“Well you’re not turning that shit in to the cops, Karlsefni!” Hild shouted, “you want all of us to get arrested?!”

“I never said I was!”

While they started arguing, Bug Eyes started panicking. Einar and Snake exchanged glances, and Snake decided that he was going to kick them out of their shop.

“Go home and go the fuck to sleep.” Snake said. “Einar, Bug Eyes, and I gotta close this shit down, and I’m not gonna have you whine and bitch at each other about who keeps the drugs. Do rock, paper, scissors if you have to. Or discuss it like mature adults. Just don’t do it in my shop. Good night.” he slammed the doors shut.

The four of them stood outside, utterly speechless.

“He’s right.” Gudrid said, “maybe we should sleep on this. It’s not like they’re not gonna help us out. They just want us to keep it safe until we figure something out.”

“...Hey, ‘Drid.” Hild pondered.

“Yeah?”

“You’d be the one anyone would least suspect.”

“...Uh-huh?”

“So what if you kept the bag?”

“L-Like I said… I can’t hide things very well.”

“But no one would think you’re hiding something like that.”

“What about Canute?” Canute startled when Gudrid pointed at him, “I heard he lives in like, a mansion!”

“Absolutely not.” Canute refused, “me? _Narcotics?_ ”

“Not like your daddy’s there to see it.” Thorfinn smirked. “You’d be the perfect volunteer.”

“Ragnar and Karianna would see it!” Canute exclaimed, “and regarding that, I also claimed repeatedly I wasn’t involved in this.”

“Your friends would shit themselves if they found out you got involved in a drug bust huh?”

“If it weren’t for your meddling habits!”

“Huh, so this is my fault now?!”

“It is.” Hild said.

“You know what, fuck you Hild!” Thorfinn spat, “for someone who was pouring their dumb feelings out to me about a stupid crush you’re sure a two-faced shitbag!”

“I’m a shitbag?!” Hild laughed hysterically, “all you’re ever is is a dickhead to everybody because you’re _so_ edgy!”

“You should keep the damn drugs since you’re so intent on letting me have it.”

Hild shoved him, “Don’t push it Karlsefni.”

“Or what?”

“Stop!” Gudrid screamed. They heard a faint siren blaring in the distance, but not closing in on their block thankfully. “Snake just told us we shouldn’t fight!”

Hild stared at her, looking a little guilty. “I’m going home.” she muttered, brushing past Thorfinn and stomping down the sidewalk.

Gudrid looked at them both and sighed. “This isn’t going anywhere. Thanks a lot, Thorfinn.” she walked past them both, rushing after Hild.

“Back to my fault.” Thorfinn said, once they were out of earshot.

“You should really re-evaluate why you’re in the predicament you’re in now.” Canute whispered. “Goodbye Thorfinn.” he walked away last.

Thorfinn would admit.

Hearing that, and knowing all his friends basically gave up hope on talking things through, was what stung a little.

Huh.

He hadn’t felt anything tight tug at his chest like that since his father.

Thorfinn came home at ten in the night. It’s just Askeladd in the living room.

“Hey Thorfy.” he turned back, “you’re back kinda late.”

Thorfinn was about to ignore him and go straight upstairs. But he stood behind the couch, backpack slung over his shoulder.

“I was at a party.” He said.

“Oh!” Askeladd shoved plantain chips into his mouth, “well how was it?”

“Someone shot it up.”

Askeladd whistled, “did you run from the cops without gettin’ caught?”

“I’m not that stupid.”

“Thatta boy.”

Thorfinn scoffed. Feeling himself smile a little. “Some guy, uh.”

Askeladd turned around and looked at him.

“He gave me a backpack full of drugs.” Thorfinn said without thinking it through, blabbering before he knew it, “he was the boyfriend of the girl throwing the party, I guess he pissed off a bunch of connects because they busted in shooting down the place.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, it’s crazy shit.”

“Let me see that shit.”

Thorfinn walked around the couch and sat down, showing Askeladd the bag. Askeladd picked up the bag and he noticed how heavy it was.

“Feels like five hundred grams.” Askeladd cackled, “must have some balls to smuggle this much.” he opened the bag and saw the grams inside. “Who’d you tell about this?”

“Just my friends. And… my work. Don’t flip your shit old man, they were there too.”

“You been carryin’ this shit around with you all night?”

“We freaked out over what we should do with this and I’m the one who’s keeping it, I guess.” Thorfinn muttered, “...we had a stupid argument before I got back. Me and my friends, and Canute.”

“He was in on this?”

“Well he was there when we almost died, so.”

Askeladd nodded slowly, “...wow, I been missin’ a lot about what’s goin’ on in your life.”

Thorfinn arched a brow. “That’s ‘cause you never gave a shit.”

“I—” Askeladd snorted, “—well you ain’t wrong there— but— look at you.” he gestured fondly, “you’re making friends now?”

“I might lose them over a backpack full of possibly five hundred grams of cocaine.” Thorfinn said, “I’m losing my fucking shit here, Askeladd.”

“You don’t wanna lose them.”

Thorfinn thought he was crazy for saying that. _Losing them?_ He laughed at first, then he pondered deeply on the thought.

He… didn’t _despise_ their company, and he didn’t _not_ like them. They dealt with his brooding shithead self constantly when all he did was glare and be a dickhead. Gudrid was a sweet girl. She had her clueless moments. Something Thorfinn could resonate with. But she was honest, she said what was on her mind, and did things out of the kindness of her heart. Hild wasn’t exactly his favorite person, likewise with her, but they just understood things that the others couldn’t. Even if she’s often barking at him and getting into scuffles about God knows what.

And Canute.

Thorfinn wanted to fucking despite him the most.

He’s a goody two-shoes and wanted to be so badly like the people who very much hated having him around, only because he wanted to maintain a perfect image to keep his father in his seat and to not stress him out.

But he stood his ground on his opinions, albeit stubborn, tentative, he knew his goals in life and had all the means of grasping exactly what he wanted with no failure. Thorfinn envied that.

“...I guess…” Thorfinn’s voice quieted down, “I’m just not used to. Any of this.”

“Would you think I’d be lying if I told you Bjorn was like my only friend, for like, over twenty years?” Askeladd asked.

“No.” Thorfinn said, “you were probably fucking insufferable.”

“I just didn’t know how to open up to anyone else. But him, he was a tough one. I just liked to bother him.”

“I hope he punched you.”

“He did! Many times.”

They actually _laughed_ , it was brief. But it was also something they hadn’t done in weeks. “I kept bothering him until he decided he was too tired to tell me to fuck off anymore. Plus, we were on the same football team. He was stuck with me, and he hated it.”

“I’m not surprised he didn’t want to be friends with you.”

“Me neither!” Askeladd laughed, “but here we are. Business partners. He’s like my rock. I don’t know what I’d do without him.”

“I don’t know why he hasn’t beat you to death with one yet.”

“Oh, Thorfy. You’ll understand. Your friends probably ask themselves the same question.”

Thorfinn glared at him.

“Well not exactly the same.” Askeladd lazily corrected himself, “more like, why do they put up with your shit?”

“...I don’t know.” Thorfinn shrugged.

“It’s because friends drive each other crazy all the time.”

“Why are you doing this?”

Askeladd drank from his beer can now, humming.

“Giving me advice.” Thorfinn elaborated.

“I’m just saying what feels like is right.” Askeladd shrugged, “call it what you want. Hey. You got a backpack full of drugs ‘cause someone was being a stupid fuck. That ain’t just something you can breeze through as easily as most things. And you’re going through a lot of crazy emotions and all that weird shit right now. It happens, and you’ll hate it. It’s just part of growing up.”

“The drugs part?”

“Well the drugs is just an example of trials and tribulations!” Askeladd said, “Bjorn and I used to deal shrooms, we had to shove it up where the sun don’t shine so they don’t catch us during locker searches— disregardin’ that— it was uncomfortable by the way and I don’t suggest it but—”

“—You can’t shove coke up your ass.”

“—and you’re definitely right, that’s why the term blood diamonds exist. Anyway, you learn more about yourself when you go through problems with other people.” Askeladd explained, “so if you’re feeling guilty, that’s expected.”

“I guess.” Thorfinn mumbled.

“Are you nervous?”

“I’ve never smuggled fucking drugs around before, Askeladd. Of course I am! And I’m the one who has to take full responsibility over it!” Thorfinn shouted.

“Fair, fair.” Askeladd put his hands up in surrender, “you’re not alone in this, right?”

“Well, no—”

“—well perfect. Most advice I can give you is to make sure you don’t turn yourself in, and to keep it safe until you’re able to deliver it.”

Thorfinn raised both brows, “so you want me to keep it too?”

“Of course you need to fucking guard that shit. It’s narcotics. Do you know how long you’re in the slammer for that shit?”

“Twenty years.”

“Exactly. You know what happened to Uncle Dagfinn. And why did that happen to Uncle Dagfinn?”

“Uncle Dagfinn’s a dumb fuck.”

“Precisely.” Askeladd said, “so now more than ever is when you gotta tread carefully in how to handle this shit. But if you feel like you’re in hot water, you can just ask either me or Bjorn, uncle Kel too.”

“No thanks.” Thorfinn answered, “this is my shit. But. Uh.” he reluctantly pulled his gaze away from Askeladd, “thanks… or whatever the fuck that was…”

“No problem. Oh, me and Bjorn were giving out candy to the kids down the block.” Askeladd pointed at the table where a bucket of candy rested. “One of them tried to stab me for the whole thing.”

“I hope they succeeded.”

“They didn’t steal the candy, silly.”

“I hope they stabbed you.” Thorfinn deadpanned.

“They did.” Askeladd grinned, and he lifted his shirt to expose a bandage wrapped around his stomach where the supposed scar should’ve been. “Feisty little kids. Reminds me of you. Anyways, Bjorn patched me up. He let them have half the candy in the bucket. So there’s not much.”

Thorfinn stood up and took the bag with him. “No thanks.” he said. “I don’t know what was injected in that shit and I don’t wanna know.”

“It’s a surprise. Like a jack-in-the-box.”

Thorfinn shook his head. “I’m tired, actually.”

“...Take it easy.”

He stared at Askeladd. “Don’t push yourself to get everything in gear so quick.”

“Can you blame me for trying to do something with my shitty life?”

“You shouldn’t deny yourself happiness.” Askeladd said as Thorfinn inched closer to the stairwell. “Don’t make everyone else feel like shit because you still do. You’ve gotta get over yourself eventually.”

“Fuck off.” Thorfinn discerned him, ascending the steps.

“Food’s in the fridge!” He heard Askeladd exclaim just as Thorfinn shut the door.

He held back a snort.

One thing undoubtedly lingered the rest of the night, however.

He still felt that heavy tug on his chest the majority of the night.

It lingered until morning.

It felt weird, going to school and knowing the events that occurred last night. It’s the hottest gossip right now, but they still had to wake up at ass-crack of dawn and continue doing their usual shit.

Except, he hadn’t really been talking to the others. They’d say hello in the halls, but they drifted off to sit with other friends during lunch time. Well, more like Thorfinn sat alone like he usually did. They walked past each other without a single word on some days. Canute was glued to his fake friends all over again, and no one spoke of the party. At least, what had happened after it.

He wanted to bring it up when he came to Canute’s place for tutoring sessions, but they’d just end up breezing through one lesson after the other and carefully averting the topic.

Thorfinn had a bag of dope in his fucking closet and saying jack shit about it was getting under his skin. It’s putting a strain on their relationship, not just with Canute, but with everyone.

Unfortunately he didn’t know how to be the confrontational type in these situations, not when he hadn’t experienced _space_ before… or whatever this was called.

Einar and Snake preferred not to discuss anything unrelated to work when Thorfinn showed up to the repair shop. Bug Eyes’ still losing his shit a little and talking about it would make him panic that they’d all get caught, so it was best to be avoided for the most part. But his two superiors told him that Thorfinn should tell them right away if something new came up.

Fine. If they were going to act all bitter and petty over their dumb argument, Thorfinn was an expert at doing that. He could play that game, too. He continued to ignore them when he saw any of them, and tried to focus on school more to distract himself. Pretend that the drugs in his closet don’t fucking exist. He was okay. He was going to figure this shit out on his own. Despite the fact that he couldn’t bring himself to look through the bag thoroughly since he tossed it in the closet. It was because he was nervous as all Hell. It’s not his business to dig through Endre’s stash and he preferred if he left it untouched for now.

It hadn’t been more than a week when Thorfinn started to feel uneasy— not because of the backpack— but because he started to _hate_ being on his own.

He understood that Gudrid, Hild, and Canute were just like him. People who had their own morals, values, beliefs, and all that shit. Things that differed widely from Thorfinn’s own with the family of crazy psycho fucks he was raised by. They didn’t want to get caught into the shit he roped himself into by force, and he was just unfortunate to be the butt of the joke.

Maybe he deserved it and this was his stupid karma.

But God damn, was this how it felt like to miss someone?

They hadn’t spent decades together. It’s been a single school year. But late November rolled in, and he was growing anxious. If that shred of… decency he felt with other people was actually pretty short-lived because of his actions and his tendency to push everything and everyone away.

He’s stabbing into the lunch table with his switchblade, ignoring his school lunch, when he saw someone sit at his table in front of him.

Thorfinn said nothing.

Friends aren’t Thorfinn’s favorite thing in the world anymore. Fuck that.

“Hey.” Gudrid said quietly. Thorfinn didn’t look up.

“Hild’s in the library.”

Thorfinn kept carving deeper into the table.

“She hasn’t been talking to me much lately. Well. I think she’s… been avoiding me since that night.”

“She’s not the only one.” Thorfinn carved the perfect _FUCK YOU_ into the table, working on making sure the lettering came out sharp enough.

“It just bugs me. You said something about a crush.”

Thorfinn stared up at Gudrid, blinking. “...I did?”

“Y-Yeah…”

“When?”

“The night we left the party.”

Thorfinn whispered a silent _fuck_ under his breath, “I don’t remember.”

“Oh…” Gudrid wrung the sleeves to her shirt down to her wrists, “well I feel like since then things changed. Well… everything, kinda changed.”

Thorfinn slowed his carving.

“I miss it.” Gudrid said. “I miss _everything_ before that stupid party.”

Thorfinn pursed his lips together tightly, looking out the window of the lunch room. “If you’re wondering, I didn’t snitch or anything.”

“I know you wouldn’t.”

“I didn’t ditch it either.”

“I know.”

“So if you don’t wanna associate with me because of it anymore—”

“—that’s not the case at all.” Gudrid said. “That’s not true.”

“So why did we all just stop fucking talking then? Why’s everyone being all weird and shit? Even Canute’s going back to his prissy little rich friends—” he bit back his words, maybe that’s how it should be. “—who cares, anyway… the party fucked everyone up.”

“Thorfinn.”

“Your friends seem to be callin’ you over.” Thorfinn went back to carving. She turned around, seeing that her friends were trying to get her attention since she left their table. “You barely used to sit with them before. Now’s always a good time for changes, huh?” he smiled, tight-lipped at her.

Gudrid turned back to Thorfinn. He didn’t want to see the guilt in her eyes or else he’d feel his heart aching or some weird shit again. They’re not his friends. Screw them. They ditched him when he needed them.

But then again.

He convinced himself he didn’t need them around.

Maybe he’s meant to be alone instead.

“Come to Hillevi’s tomorrow after school.” Gudrid told him. She’s still looking at him. Thorfinn carved a little harder into the table. “I miss that diner we used to go to a lot. I wanna talk this out with everyone. You don’t deserve to go through this alone.”

“I should handle it.”

“But we’re a team, y’know?” Gudrid swayed. “You don’t have to. I understand if you wanna figure it out yourself. I hope everything’s okay, Finn.”

“I’ll be less miserable eventually.” Thorfinn flipped his knife around in his hand and snapped it shut.

Gudrid seemed to give up then, standing up and wandering back to her friends with one last glance at Thorfinn.

Thorfinn decided he’s going to get another soda from the vending machine. Chips, too. He headed to the side of the canteen, ignoring the bitterness in his chest and his conscious screaming at him to listen to Ylva and his mother and to finally fucking _get over himself._

He noticed that Canute was there, as he struggled to get something out of the vending machine.

Thorfinn shoved his hands in his pockets.

“Hurry up!” The dickhead behind him angrily shouted, “I’m tryna get some snacks here!”

“Sorry,” Canute apologized, “it just seems to be stuck.”

“Well tough luck!”

“Just give me a second.”

“Dude, you can just get another one.”

“Yo.” Thorfinn caught his attention, and the asshole looked at him. “He said his snack is stuck in there. How about you wait for another minute?”

“Who the fuck are you to tell me what to do, Karlsefni?”

“A wait won’t kill you.”

Jocks had the habit of getting up in his face to intimidate him. Thorfinn sized him up and down, unflinching.

“Tough talk for a midget.”

Thorfinn slammed his fist into his stomach.

“Thorfinn.” Canute stood up. Thorfinn ignored him, shoving the guy aside.

“Either you wait a second or next punch ain’t gonna hurt any less.”

“ _Thorfinn_.”

The guy’s friend pulled him aside, staring Thorfinn down. But neither of them wanted to get in trouble with the staff, already eyeing them down. Fortunately, they missed the part where Thorfinn punched him. He would’ve done more if he didn’t allow himself the grace of keeping his calm.

He walked past Canute, once again, disregarding the heated calling of his name. Thorfinn kicked the vending machine a few times.

Canute’s soda fell through. Thorfinn bent down and pulled it out.

“It does that sometimes.” He said, handing Canute his soda. “Just kick it around and it’ll cough it up.”

“You don’t have to pretend you care what happens to me.”

“Then don’t let people treat you like that.” Thorfinn said. “It pisses me off when others think they can be as disrespectful as they please.”

Canute didn’t leave as Thorfinn selected what he wanted from the vending machine, taking out his chips, then his soda can, shoving it into his backpack for later.

“Gudrid said to meet her at Hillevi’s tomorrow.” He said, quieter.

Thorfinn looked down at his can.

“Are you going?” Canute asked, the faintness of hope in his tone, stepping closer to Thorfinn.

His chest felt tight all over again.

“You don’t have to pretend to like me anymore, either.” Thorfinn muttered. He looked Canute in his enamoring blue eyes, surprise swirling in them at Thorfinn’s chagrin. “People oughta think we’re goin’ through a break-up.” He smiled bitterly.

“—Thorfinn—”

“—that’s what they want, right?”

“—that may be the case—”

“—so what?”

“ _But it’s not for me._ ” Canute pressed. Thorfinn’s heart pounded in his chest. He laughed. Finding that hard to believe.

“You and I are never gonna see eye to eye on shit.” Thorfinn said, “face it. I don’t care what you tell your dad about what’s going on between us, but leave me out of it. The deal’s still on and that’s all there is to it.”

“Is it really?” Canute asked, taking Thorfinn’s hand.

He noticed that people were staring at them.

“Please be honest with me.” Canute pleaded.

“I’ll try my best to show up to your place as soon as I end my shift tonight. I’m gonna go to the bleachers.” Thorfinn pried his hand away, trying not to be too rough in doing so. “You shouldn’t be seen with me too much.” he walked away.

Canute didn’t follow him out the cafeteria when Thorfinn escaped to the bleachers to light up a cigarette.

He saw Hild leave the library, saying goodbye to the librarian when they both made eye contact.

Lunch was almost over soon. She’s probably heading into the cafeteria just to hang around until the bell rang.

She and Thorfinn held each other’s gaze, and then they looked ahead. Crossing paths in opposite directions.

It’s much better being outside than in that shithole.

Thorfinn lit a cigarette and stared at the empty field ahead.

He opened his phone, opening his photos. He swiped through pointless family photos Askeladd sent him over the years… stopping on the ones Helga sent to him.

There’s one, an old photo, frameless, taken of his father, Helga, Ylva, and Thorfinn. When he was much younger.

The necklace around his chest of a tiny horn with black strings connected to it. Thorfinn touched his neck. He hadn’t worn that necklace in years. It was his father’s.

A text from Gudrid distracted him from his thoughts.

 **Gudrid [12:15 P.M]:** think it over.

 **Gudrid [12:16 P.M]:** please

Thorfinn shut his phone off.

 _Fuck._ Thorfinn flicked off the ash at the rear end, his eyes narrowing in defeat.

He missed those assholes.

Terribly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: maybe the gang just might get back together
> 
> My twitter, spotify, and curiouscat:
> 
>  **[Twitter](http://twitter.com/danganphobia)** | **[Spotify Playlist](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4MxTZT09N2j7OqiZLmVBin?si=o67s_KWMRE-pitReWrGbow)** | **[Curious Cat](https://curiouscat.me/danganphobia)**


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